Contents Basics Confusions Advanced Appendix A: Getting a ClientAppendix B: GlossaryAppendix C: Index

ifMUD Glossary

Some of these terms are mud-specific; others are used throughout the internet. We're trying to cover all our bases here. We're not, however, trying to cover every ifMUD injoke ever - that would be silly. For IF-specific jargon, we recommend the glossary at IFwiki.

If you're already on the MUD, Alex may be a quicker way to check up an unknown term than this glossary. Just whisper a question to him:

.alex wtf?
Alex whispers, "Awwwk! Word on the street is that WTF is What The Fuck. Also, (tm) Gunther. Also, Wring the Frogs. Also, Walk Through Forever. Also, World Taekwondo Federation. No, really. Check out and see."
Usually the first answer will be the one you're looking for, but you'll also probably get a whole lot of information you don't need.

As Far As I Can Tell.

As Far As I Know.

Away From Keyboard. Indicates that someone's going to be briefly idle.

As Much as the Next Girl. A reference to Adam Cadre's game I-0, which contained the phrase "Though you spend as much time splittin' the kitten as the next girl, this may not be the right moment." This got transmuted in the ifMUD consciousness to "You enjoy splittin' the kitten as much as the next girl, but now really isn't the time." Used when someone's making a cheap double-entendre for any kind of sexual activity.
For instance, one of the default olounges is:

foobar likes to 'enter the lounge' AMATNG.
bot, Auda watches channel usage to see which public channels have been most active lately. She doesn't keep logs or record names. To get more information about how she works, page auda = help.

Baf's Guide, a powerful index/searching tool for the IF Archive.

A program that looks superficially like a MUD user; they do useful (and not-so-useful) stuff. Major bots include Alex, Markov and Floyd.

Akin to re, this is said when people are briefly disconnected.

cork nut
An almond. The real-life inspiration for
Alex, not knowing a word for 'almond', invented his own by combining the words 'cork' and 'nut'. If you mention either almonds or corknuts around Alex, he will express his desire for them.

Used as a noun, this is a message that displays when someone logs into the MUD. See also disconnect.

Computer-Switching Bastard. People say this when they are about to log out and then log in again from a different computer.

Used as a noun, this is a message that displays when someone logs off the MUD. See also connect.

bot, Floyd lives in the Toyshop. You can use him to run IF games over the MUD, as well as multiplayer games like Werewolf. To find out how he works, go to the Toyshop and look floyd's instructions.

For What It's Worth.

Hope This Helps.

A player is idle if they're connected to the MUD but haven't done anything for a while - they might be away from the computer or just in another window.

IF Archive
The repository of most freeware IF. You can visit it
here, although it's probably easier to use Baf's Guide (see also Baf's Guide).

IF language
A high-level programming language in which IF is written. Although there are dozens of IF languages, the most modern and powerful are Inform (which produces games in Z-code), TADS and Hugo. Adrift, less powerful but easier to use, is also popular.

If I Recall Correctly.

I Just Like To Say.

I Like a Channel. People say this when they accidentally type on the wrong
channel (this tends to happen when people are talking on several channels at once). Sometimes intentionally misspelled ILAK.

I Like a Fucking Channel. (See ILAC).

I Like a Lounge. Like ILAC, except for when you speak on a channel when you meant to speak in the lounge.

I Like a Whisper.

In My (Humble) Opinion.

Akin to a textdump (see textdump). Giving vast amounts of information all at once.

If You Know What I Mean.

Not an acronym, but a reference to David Cornelson's game Cattus Atrox. It's just something that ifMUDders think it's funny to shout.

bot, Markov logs MUD conversations and scrambles them. Talking to him about stuff produces occasionally-funny gibberish. (This should be done on #markov or through whispers, or people will get annoyed).

Noun and verb. To mischannel is to say something on the wrong channel, or to emote instead of speaking on a channel (by mixing up : and ; ), etc. A mischannel is an instance of this happening. "oops, mischannel" or something of the sort is equivalent to ILAC.

Not Enough Information. "More details, please."

A message printed when someone goes home (usually when they log out). Most people set their own.

A message printed when someone enters the lounge. By default they're random, but most people set their own. See
here for how to set your own.

On The Other Hand.

Pasting a huge chunk of text into speech, etc. This can really annoy people, and should be used sparingly, with good warnings, only with good reason, and on the #pastebomb channel.

plover, a site currently maintained by Peter Seebach that hosts a lot of MUDders' pages.

raif / rgif / r*if
Two IF-related Usenet newsgroups, and Many (but by no means all) ifMUD regulars are also r*if regulars, and vice versa.

People say this sometimes instead of their usual greeting if their connection to the mud dropped so they had to log back in, or sometimes just if they logged off the mud for a fairly short amount of time.

Expression of wry amusement.

Information about a game that someone who hasn't played it wouldn't know, particularly if knowing that information beforehand would affect their playing experience, 'spoiling' the game for them. Spoilers should be kept on the channel for the relevant game, in the spoiler room southeast of the lounge, or on the #spoilers channel (with due warning).

Many channels are entitled 'whatever-sux'. This isn't to say that the channel's exclusively for bitching about the subject, although plenty of that may go on. The default channel for talking about r*if, for instance, is called #r*if-sux, and gets used regardless of whether people are complaining about it or not.

Saying, emoting, etc. a huge chunk of text. The MUD is basically a chatroom, not a forum; doing this is like getting up and delivering an epic monologue in the middle of a friendly chat. See also pastebomb.

Too Much Information. Conversation about gross stuff should be confined to the appropriate channel, #tmi.

That Sounds Dirty. ifMUD is not known for its purity of mind. There's an entire channel for this, #tsd.

vanity channel
A channel made by one person - for instance, #maga-angst or #dustworld - on which they can talk about the random minutiae, woes, and miscellaneous crap of their lives, without anybody telling them to shut up.

Work In Progress - i.e. IF that hasn't been finished yet. Often called WNIP (Work Not In Progress) when authors are having a bad day.

What The Fuck?

Way Too Much Information. For the really nasty stuff. Has its own channel, #wtmi. The distinction between this and TMI is a matter of judgement.

Contents Basics Confusions Advanced Appendix A: Getting a ClientAppendix B: GlossaryAppendix C: Index

This FAQ was assembled by Storme Winfield (Storme) and Sam Kabo Ashwell (maga), with help from Jacqueline Lott (Jacqueline), with useful suggestions from various MUDders, notably Peter Berman (mcp). Based in part upon ifMUD Frequently Asked Questions 2.1.3, by Mark J. Musante (markm), with additions by Adam Cadre (Adam) and Admiral Jota (Jota).