ClubFloyd Transcript:
Adventurers Consumer Guide by Řyvind Thorsby

As played on ifMUD on September 25, 2010

The idea behind ClubFloyd is that each week at a pre-arranged time, a group of people meet online to cooperatively play a game of interactive fiction.

Below is a transcript of Adventurers Consumer Guide, written by Řyvind Thorsby. Adventurers Consumer Guide was originally released in 2007. You can learn more about the game, including how to download it, by visiting the ifWiki.

WARNING! Below you will find a transcript of people playing this game, and it goes without saying that the transcript is full of spoilers. So, if you've never played this game, and think you might like to at some point, I do not recommend reading any further. Instead, you might want to return to the interactive fiction page.


ToyShop & Floyditorium
#ClubFloyd Discussion
 
DavidW says (to Floyd), "load acg"
Floyd | Welcome to the Cheap Glk Implementation, library version 0.9.0.
Floyd |
Floyd |
Floyd | Adventurer's Consumer Guide
Floyd | You are a product tester for the Adventurer's Consumer Guide, a
Floyd | magazine that reviews all sorts of equipment an adventurer might need
Floyd | for his adventures. Your magazine is highly respected because of the
Floyd | thorough tests you put the equipment through. The tests aren't just
Floyd | done at the magazine's offices. No, the product testers go on actual
Floyd | adventures to test the equipment out in the field. Sometimes you kill
Floyd | an evil overlord; sometimes you rescue a fair maiden. Most of the time,
Floyd | like today, you just go out looking for a treasure in Treasure Cave
Floyd | Mountain, a perfect place for adventures as it contains plenty of
Floyd | caves, treasures, monsters and traps.
Floyd |
Floyd | As you are putting on the soon-to-be-tested magical coat, magical ring
Floyd | and magical helmet, your editor says, "On this mission you'll be having
Floyd | a helper with you."
Floyd | "Really?" you say. You usually work alone.
Floyd | "Yeah, but it's part of a test. See, there's this new agency that is
Floyd | renting out sidekicks. We are going to write a review about it. Oh,
Floyd | here he is now."
Floyd | Into your office walks a goblin: a green humanoid creature with pointy
Floyd | ears, about a meter tall. "Hi, you must be my new boss," he says to
Floyd | you.
Floyd | "I guess I am. What is it you're supposed to do, exactly?"
Floyd | "Well, I'm very brave and helpful, plus I'm a ferocious killing
Floyd | machine. If you see any kind of monster, or anything at all, and you
Floyd | want it killed, just tell me, and it's toast."
Floyd | "Okay... well, I think we should get going."
Floyd |
Floyd | You and your new companion are off to Treasure Cave Mountain. Your
Floyd | mission is to return with one really big treasure. Any really big
Floyd | treasure.
Floyd |
Floyd | If you are unfamiliar with interactive fiction, type HELP.
Floyd | If you care, type CREDITS.
Floyd | In this game you can't examine things. Instead use either "look" to see
Floyd | descriptions of the things in the room you are in, or "inventory" to
Floyd | see descriptions of what you are carrying. You also can't use "look
Floyd | inside", "look under", "look behind", "look <direction>" or "search".
Floyd | But you can use "read".
Floyd | To see your inventory without the long descriptions of all you are
Floyd | carrying, type: "inventory short". Or simply: "i s". Or simply: "is".
Floyd | No time passes when you use "look" or "inventory".
Floyd | You communicate by "talk to [whatever]", or by giving commands in this
Floyd | format: "goblin, give me the cow-o-meter".
Floyd | It is possible to put this game in an unwinnable state, but you should
Floyd | be able to figure out when this has happened.
Floyd | Should you wish to re-read the above information during the game, type
Floyd | ABOUT.
Floyd |
Floyd | Release 1 / Serial number 070501 / Inform v6.30 Library 6/11 S
Floyd |
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading west (where you came from) and east. To
Floyd | the north is a tall mountain wall and to the south a long drop.
Floyd | Very far to the east, near the end of the ledge, a huge monster is
Floyd | crouching. Its green skin is scaly, its body is bloated like a balloon,
Floyd | its four feet have long terrible claws, its wide mouth has thousands of
Floyd | sharp teeth and on top of its head is a cluster of about fifty bulging
Floyd | eyes as big as your head.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see the goblin sidekick here.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, kill me"
Floyd | >Before you have a chance to say anything you get a nasty electric
Floyd | shock from your helmet. You hear a calm pleasant female voice in your
Floyd | head: "It wouldn't be very heroic to ask somebody else to do your
Floyd | fighting for you."
Floyd |
inky exclaims, " ha ha" inky says, "er"
Gerynar Nature, in fact, abhors a lot of things, including vacuums, ships named Marie Celeste, the chuck keys to electric drills, and at this moment, Gerynar being in the lounge.
Gerynar has disconnected. eladnarra asks, "hm. inventory, then?"
DavidW says, "please do"
DavidW says, "(Use: f command )"
DavidW says, "Um, I've already played this. I hope someone will give a command to Floyd."
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "i"
Floyd | >The new magical sword from Adventurer's Emporium. According to the
Floyd | commercial it will start to vibrate when you are close to danger.
Floyd | A mail-ordered short metal staff with a clear orb on the end. Its
Floyd | manufacturers say the staff will remove any creature that comes in
Floyd | contact with the orb. Inside the orb you can see a small unmoving
Floyd | cluster of turquoise tentacles.
Floyd | A Remmingheim Supreme crossbow, loaded with an arrow. The Supreme model
Floyd | is supposed to have a special feature. When you shoot it, the arrow
Floyd | will magically return, and the crossbow will be loaded again. The hard,
Floyd | razor-sharp arrow is protruding a good ten centimeters from the front
Floyd | of the crossbow.
Floyd | "The Ultimate Creature Manual" by Arthur Hippoman. According to the
Floyd | back it contains information about every single monster in the world,
Floyd | and how to defend yourself against them. It is suspiciously thin.
Floyd | A small cage. It is closed and locked with a code-lock (You know the
Floyd | code.). A gremlin, a small green humanoid creature with pointy ears, is
Floyd | trapped inside. He is wearing a tiny ring. He is smoking a tiny
Floyd | cigarette. His thin arms are sticking through the bars of the cage, and
Floyd | he is fiddling with the code-lock, trying one combination at a time.
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | A Hustlespleen & Poe Coat of Invisibility, though at the moment it
Floyd | looks like an ordinary, long, brown, coat. It is supposed to turn
Floyd | invisible (or turn visible again) whenever you say the magic word
Floyd | "tango".
Floyd | A Super Champion Helmet fastened with a strap under your chin. It is
Floyd | round and made of thin metal. It is supposed to magically turn you into
Floyd | a hero.
Floyd | On your finger is a Snuffelburg & Co. Type F Magical Ring. It is red
Floyd | and golden. It is supposed to protect you from any magical rays, by
Floyd | moving the effect of the ray away from you and onto the gremlin, which
Floyd | is wearing a smaller, magically connected, ring.
Floyd | A pair of red boxer shorts, decorated with tiny teddy-bears dressed as
Floyd | sailors. They are not something you are supposed to test; they are your
Floyd | own.
Floyd |
eladnarra says, "sorry, was still dealing with foodstuffs"
Jizaboz says, "look"
Jizaboz says (to floyd), "look"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading west (where you came from) and east. To
Floyd | the north is a tall mountain wall and to the south a long drop.
Floyd | Very far to the east, near the end of the ledge, a huge monster is
Floyd | crouching. Its green skin is scaly, its body is bloated like a balloon,
Floyd | its four feet have long terrible claws, its wide mouth has thousands of
Floyd | sharp teeth and on top of its head is a cluster of about fifty bulging
Floyd | eyes as big as your head.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see the goblin sidekick here.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot crossbow at goblin"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | Before you have a chance to do it, you get a nasty electrical shock
Floyd | from your helmet. You hear a calm pleasant female voice in your head:
Floyd | "It wouldn't be very heroic to go around shooting creatures."
Floyd |
inky says, "this helmet sucks"
inky says (to Floyd), "x helmet"
Floyd | >In this game you can't examine things. Instead use either "look" to
Floyd | see descriptions of the things in the room you are in, or "inventory"
Floyd | to see descriptions of what you are carrying. You also can't use "look
Floyd | inside", "look under", "look behind", "look <direction>" or "search".
Floyd | But you can use "read".
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "remove helmet"
Floyd | >You try to remove the helmet, but it is stuck. The strap under your
Floyd | chin is too tight.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "cut strap with arrow"
Floyd | >You cut the strap with the arrow, and pull off the helmet.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot crossbow at goblin"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | You pull the trigger. The arrow magically returns to the crossbow and
Floyd | the crossbow is loaded again. Huh? That happened fast. The arrow did
Floyd | not even have time to leave the crossbow entirely! In fact, it barely
Floyd | moved!
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
eladnarra says, "oh dear :D"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "read book"
Floyd | >You must say what page to read, like "read page 1" or "read 1"
Floyd |
Jizaboz says (to floyd), "load crossbow"
Floyd | >You can't just load something. You have to have some kind of
Floyd | ammunition.
Floyd |
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "read 1"
Floyd | >On the front is a badly drawn picture of three monsters running away
Floyd | from a man who is holding a copy of the book over his head.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "heh heh"
eladnarra says, "a promising cover"
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "read 2"
Floyd | >So, you have spotted a monster. How many legs does it have?
Floyd | None: read page 3
Floyd | One: read page 35
Floyd | Two: read page 36
Floyd | Three: read page 62
Floyd | Four: read page 63
Floyd | Six: read page 86
Floyd | Eight: read page 87
Floyd | Forty eight billion and five: read page 90
Floyd | It varies: read page 91
Floyd |
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "read 63"
Floyd | >Does it have hooves?
Floyd | Yes: read page 64
Floyd | No: read page 72
Floyd |
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "read 72"
Floyd | >Is it hairy?
Floyd | Yes: read page 73
Floyd | No: read page 79
Floyd |
dsimon arrives, ready to play with the toys.
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "read 79"
Floyd | >Does it have large bulging eyes?
Floyd | No: read page 80
Floyd | Yes: read page 81
Floyd |
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "read 81"
Floyd | >Is it green?
Floyd | No: read page 82
Floyd | Yes: read page 83
Floyd |
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "read 83"
Floyd | >Does it have a wide mouth?
Floyd | No: read page 84
Floyd | Yes: read page 85
Floyd |
DavidW says, "This book is so wack."
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "read 85"
Floyd | >Oh, it's just a frog then. Nothing to worry about.
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Hi everyone"
eladnarra says, "hahahaha"
DavidW says, "hi dsimon"
eladnarra says, "hi~"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "x frog"
Floyd | >In this game you can't examine things. Instead use either "look" to
Floyd | see descriptions of the things in the room you are in, or "inventory"
Floyd | to see descriptions of what you are carrying. You also can't use "look
Floyd | inside", "look under", "look behind", "look <direction>" or "search".
Floyd | But you can use "read".
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "l"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading west (where you came from) and east. To
Floyd | the north is a tall mountain wall and to the south a long drop.
Floyd | Very far to the east, near the end of the ledge, a huge monster is
Floyd | crouching. Its green skin is scaly, its body is bloated like a balloon,
Floyd | its four feet have long terrible claws, its wide mouth has thousands of
Floyd | sharp teeth and on top of its head is a cluster of about fifty bulging
Floyd | eyes as big as your head.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see the goblin sidekick here.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, attack frog"
Floyd | >"We aren't close enough boss!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, attack monster"
Floyd | >"We aren't close enough boss!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading west and east.
Floyd | Quite far to the east, near the end of the ledge, a huge monster is
Floyd | crouching. Its green skin is scaly, its body is bloated like a balloon,
Floyd | its four feet have long terrible claws, its wide mouth has thousands of
Floyd | sharp teeth and on top of its head is a cluster of about fifty bulging
Floyd | eyes as big as your head.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword starts vibrating ever so slightly.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading west and east.
Floyd | Some distance to the east, near the end of the ledge, a huge monster is
Floyd | crouching. Its green skin is scaly, its body is bloated like a balloon,
Floyd | its four feet have long terrible claws, its wide mouth has thousands of
Floyd | sharp teeth and on top of its head is a cluster of about fifty bulging
Floyd | eyes as big as your head.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword starts shaking quite a lot.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading west and east.
Floyd | Not all that far to the east, near the end of the ledge, a huge monster
Floyd | is crouching. Its green skin is scaly, its body is bloated like a
Floyd | balloon, its four feet have long terrible claws, its wide mouth has
Floyd | thousands of sharp teeth and on top of its head is a cluster of about
Floyd | fifty bulging eyes as big as your head.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword starts shaking like crazy.
Floyd |
Floyd | You have a hard time holding on to the sword, and you have to struggle
Floyd | to keep from slashing yourself.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, attack monster"
Floyd | >"We aren't close enough boss!"
Floyd |
Floyd | You have a hard time holding on to the sword, and you have to struggle
Floyd | to keep from slashing yourself.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd | A huge monster is crouching on the ledge. Its green skin is scaly, its
Floyd | body is bloated like a balloon, its four feet have long terrible claws,
Floyd | its wide mouth has thousands of sharp teeth and on top of its head is a
Floyd | cluster of about fifty bulging eyes as big as your head.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword goes even crazier and starts thrashing like a headless
Floyd | chicken on drugs.
Floyd |
Floyd | Unable to control the sword, you are slashed into little pieces.
Floyd |
Floyd |     *** You have pulled the plug. ***
Floyd |
Floyd |
Floyd | In that game you scored 1 out of a possible 100, in 24 turns. You get
Floyd | reincarnated as a germ, living in the left pinky toe of Else Mogen, a
Floyd | neurotic hairdresser from Copenhagen.
Floyd | Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, UNDO your last move or
Floyd | QUIT?
DavidW says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | > On a mountain ledge
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "drop sword"
Floyd | >Dropped.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd | A huge monster is crouching on the ledge. Its green skin is scaly, its
Floyd | body is bloated like a balloon, its four feet have long terrible claws,
Floyd | its wide mouth has thousands of sharp teeth and on top of its head is a
Floyd | cluster of about fifty bulging eyes as big as your head.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | All the eyes of the green monster swivel round and stare at the goblin.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, attack frog"
Floyd | >The goblin throws himself at the monster. The monster opens its jaws
Floyd | and lunges forward. The mouth closes around the goblin. You hear some
Floyd | muffled goblin screams from within the monster's head. Just when you
Floyd | think your sidekick's career came to very early stop, the monster
Floyd | sneezes and the green guy comes shooting out of the monster's nostril
Floyd | and lands in a heap. Confused he shakes his head and mutters, "Sorry
Floyd | boss."
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster roars.
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Heh"
dsimon goes home.
dsimon has disconnected. DavidW says, "I'll remind everyone that 'is' is 'inventory short' in this game."
DavidW says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >A staff (with tentacles)
Floyd | A Supreme crossbow (loaded)
Floyd | A manual
Floyd | A cage (with a gremlin) (closed and locked)
Floyd | A helmet
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | A coat (visible)
Floyd | A ring
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
eladnarra says, "hm..."
dsimon arrives, ready to play with the toys.
djfletch says (to Floyd), "goblin, attack frog"
Floyd | >The goblin throws himself at the monster. The monster opens its jaws
Floyd | and lunges forward. The mouth closes around the goblin. You hear some
Floyd | muffled goblin screams from within the monster's head. Just when you
Floyd | think your sidekick's career came to very early stop, the monster
Floyd | sneezes and the green guy comes shooting out of the monster's nostril
Floyd | and lands in a heap. Confused he shakes his head and mutters, "Sorry
Floyd | boss."
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster's tongue shoots out towards your legs, but you manage
Floyd | to jump to the side.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "yeah, that doesn't work."
dsimon says, "Argh, mud client keeps crashing"
dsimon says, "Suppose we give the sword to the goblin? Maybe he can use it better"
djfletch says, "hmm could work"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading west and east.
Floyd | Not all that far to the east, near the end of the ledge, a huge monster
Floyd | is crouching. Its green skin is scaly, its body is bloated like a
Floyd | balloon, its four feet have long terrible claws, its wide mouth has
Floyd | thousands of sharp teeth and on top of its head is a cluster of about
Floyd | fifty bulging eyes as big as your head.
Floyd |
Floyd | The new magical sword from Adventurer's Emporium is here. According to
Floyd | the commercial it will start to vibrate when you are close to danger.
Floyd | It is shaking like crazy.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take sword"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
Floyd | You have a hard time holding on to the sword, and you have to struggle
Floyd | to keep from slashing yourself.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "give sword to goblin"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | The goblin says, "No thanks. Carrying around a vibrating sword sounds
Floyd | kind of dangerous."
Floyd |
Floyd | You have a hard time holding on to the sword, and you have to struggle
Floyd | to keep from slashing yourself.
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Bah, he's smarter than I expected"
eladnarra says, "heh"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to goblin"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | "What should I do now?" you ask.
Floyd | "I think we must deal with that monster, boss. How bout you hit it with
Floyd | the staff?"
Floyd |
Floyd | You have a hard time holding on to the sword, and you have to struggle
Floyd | to keep from slashing yourself.
Floyd |
dsimon asks, "Staff?"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "i"
Floyd | >The new magical sword from Adventurer's Emporium. According to the
Floyd | commercial it will start to vibrate when you are close to danger. It is
Floyd | shaking like crazy, and you can barely hold on to it or prevent it from
Floyd | cutting yourself.
Floyd | A mail-ordered short metal staff with a clear orb on the end. Its
Floyd | manufacturers say the staff will remove any creature that comes in
Floyd | contact with the orb. Inside the orb you can see a small unmoving
Floyd | cluster of turquoise tentacles.
Floyd | A Remmingheim Supreme crossbow, loaded with an arrow. The Supreme model
Floyd | is supposed to have a special feature. When you shoot it, the arrow
Floyd | will magically return, and the crossbow will be loaded again. The hard,
Floyd | razor-sharp arrow is protruding a good ten centimeters from the front
Floyd | of the crossbow.
Floyd | "The Ultimate Creature Manual" by Arthur Hippoman. According to the
Floyd | back it contains information about every single monster in the world,
Floyd | and how to defend yourself against them. It is suspiciously thin.
Floyd | A small cage. It is closed and locked with a code-lock (You know the
Floyd | code.). A gremlin, a small green humanoid creature with pointy ears, is
Floyd | trapped inside. He is wearing a tiny ring. He is smoking a tiny
Floyd | cigarette. His thin arms are sticking through the bars of the cage, and
Floyd | he is fiddling with the code-lock, trying one combination at a time.
Floyd | A Super Champion Helmet. It is round and made of thin metal. It was
Floyd | supposed to magically turn you into a hero.
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | A Hustlespleen & Poe Coat of Invisibility, though at the moment it
Floyd | looks like an ordinary, long, brown, coat. It is supposed to turn
Floyd | invisible (or turn visible again) whenever you say the magic word
Floyd | "tango".
Floyd | On your finger is a Snuffelburg & Co. Type F Magical Ring. It is red
Floyd | and golden. It is supposed to protect you from any magical rays, by
Floyd | moving the effect of the ray away from you and onto the gremlin, which
Floyd | is wearing a smaller, magically connected, ring.
Floyd | A pair of red boxer shorts, decorated with tiny teddy-bears dressed as
Floyd | sailors. They are not something you are supposed to test; they are your
Floyd | own.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "Yes, we have a staff with an orb at one end."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to helmet"
Floyd | >You can only do that to something animate.
Floyd |
Jacqueline arrives, ready to play with the toys.
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "drop sword"
Floyd | >Dropped.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "hey Jacqueline!"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd | A huge monster is crouching on the ledge. Its green skin is scaly, its
Floyd | body is bloated like a balloon, its four feet have long terrible claws,
Floyd | its wide mouth has thousands of sharp teeth and on top of its head is a
Floyd | cluster of about fifty bulging eyes as big as your head.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster roars.
Floyd |
Jacqueline says, "And now suddenly it lets me in... weird."
Jacqueline gets bored and wanders off to the Toyshop.
Jacqueline arrives, ready to play with the toys.
dsimon says (to Floyd), "shoot monster with crossbow"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. The arrow magically returns to the crossbow and
Floyd | the crossbow is loaded again. Huh? That happened fast. The arrow did
Floyd | not even have time to leave the crossbow entirely! In fact, it barely
Floyd | moved!
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster steps on the goblin. The poor goblin disappears
Floyd | completely beneath the huge foot. After a while the monster lifts the
Floyd | foot, while looking down as if to see if the goblin is dead. He isn't.
Floyd | Dazed, the goblin gets up, shakes his head, and takes some steps away
Floyd | from the monster.
Floyd |
Jizaboz says, "Hey Jacqueline"
eladnarra says, "woot, you made it~"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "hit monster with staff"
Floyd | >The huge monster vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | A gigantic monster appears. It seems to consist entirely of many
Floyd | entwined writhing turquoise tentacles. There are no legs or arms or
Floyd | head. Each tentacle is as thick as a person and none seem to be shorter
Floyd | than five meters.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the huge monster is inside the orb now, tiny and
Floyd | unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle grabs one of the goblin's ears and lifts him from the
Floyd | ground. The goblin screams before the ear slides out of the tentacles
Floyd | grip, and he falls down.
Floyd |
Jacqueline says, "Oh, but I'm still terribly lagged. This hotel hates the ifMUD."
Jacqueline says, "Weird."
Jizaboz says, "that is weird"
dsimon says, "Okay so now we have a bigger problem..."
dsimon says (to Floyd), "hit monster with staff"
Floyd | >The gigantic tentacle monster vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The huge green monster appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the gigantic tentacle monster is inside the orb now,
Floyd | tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster's tongue wraps itself around the waist of the goblin.
Floyd | The goblin is dragged kicking and screaming towards the monster's
Floyd | mouth. You manage to grab one of the goblin's arms and pull him loose
Floyd | from the tongue.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "we could look up the tentacle monster"
inky says, "ok I see this one"
eladnarra says, "wow. such useless stuff we're testing :D"
inky says (to Floyd), "hit goblin with staff"
dsimon goes home.
dsimon has disconnected.
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick with the staff)
Floyd | The goblin sidekick vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | A gigantic monster appears. It seems to consist entirely of many
Floyd | entwined writhing turquoise tentacles. There are no legs or arms or
Floyd | head. Each tentacle is as thick as a person and none seem to be shorter
Floyd | than five meters.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the goblin sidekick is inside the orb now, tiny and
Floyd | unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle grabs the tongue of the green monster and begins to pull.
Floyd | But the tongue pulls back, and the tentacle is dragged into the mouth
Floyd | of the green monster. The green monster bites off the end of the
Floyd | tentacle. The wounded tentacle, bleeding dark blue liquid, withdraws
Floyd | into the cluster of tentacles. The green monster chews on the tip of
Floyd | the tentacle for a while then swallows.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster swings one of its legs at a tentacle, but misses.
Floyd |
eladnarra says, "oh~"
djfletch says, "cunning"
inky says (to Floyd), "z"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle wraps around the green monster's head. The monster scratches
Floyd | the tentacle with its claws, and the tentacle withdraws.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster swings one of its legs at a tentacle, but misses.
Floyd |
inky says, "I can't actually tell if this is doing anything useful or not"
inky says (to Floyd), "z"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle grabs your arm, and you are pulled towards the cluster. You
Floyd | hit the tentacle and it lets go.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster tries to hit you with the claws of one foot, but you
Floyd | manage to step back just in time.
Floyd |
inky says, "I guess not really"
eladnarra says, "aw"
DavidW says, "Nice try, though."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "read 2"
Floyd | >So, you have spotted a monster. How many legs does it have?
Floyd | None: read page 3
Floyd | One: read page 35
Floyd | Two: read page 36
Floyd | Three: read page 62
Floyd | Four: read page 63
Floyd | Six: read page 86
Floyd | Eight: read page 87
Floyd | Forty eight billion and five: read page 90
Floyd | It varies: read page 91
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle grabs you around your feet and lifts you up. You are hanging
Floyd | upside down. You wiggle your legs, until the tentacle lets go and you
Floyd | fall down.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster swings one of its legs at a tentacle, but misses.
Floyd |
dsimon arrives, ready to play with the toys. DavidW says, "And you do need to experiment with your equipment."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "read 3"
Floyd | >Which of the following body parts does it have?
Floyd | Fins: read page 4
Floyd | Branches: read page 8
Floyd | Tentacles: read page 11
Floyd | Arms: read page 14
Floyd | None of the above: read page 29
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle grabs the tongue of the green monster and begins to pull.
Floyd | But the tongue pulls back, and the tentacle is dragged into the mouth
Floyd | of the green monster. The green monster bites off the end of the
Floyd | tentacle. The wounded tentacle, bleeding dark blue liquid, withdraws
Floyd | into the cluster of tentacles. The green monster chews on the tip of
Floyd | the tentacle for a while then swallows.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster tries to hit you with the claws of one foot, but you
Floyd | manage to step back just in time.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "read 11"
Floyd | >How many tentacles?
Floyd | Eight: read page 12
Floyd | Lots: Read page 13
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle grabs your arm, and you are pulled towards the cluster. You
Floyd | hit the tentacle and it lets go.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster lunges towards the tentacle monster, trying to bite
Floyd | it, but the tentacle monster wiggles back out of reach.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "read 13"
Floyd | >Pope's Delight:
Floyd | You'll need:
Floyd | 1 cup of water
Floyd | 2 cups of camel milk
Floyd | 1 handful of sugar
Floyd | 1 mouthful of flour
Floyd | 1 kilo of parrot spleens
Floyd | 1 otter, dead
Floyd | Some whiskey
Floyd |
Floyd | Mix all the incidences, except the otter and the whiskey, into a paste.
Floyd | Fry it in a pan for 20 minutes at full heat. Shave the otter and stuff
Floyd | it with the paste. Boil it until its nose falls off, then dip it in
Floyd | whiskey. Traditionally served with fried potatoes and donkey milk.
Floyd |
Floyd | The letters on this page are different from the rest of the book. You
Floyd | realize this page actually belongs in another book, and has been
Floyd | printed here by mistake.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle plunges down towards your feet, but you manage to jump away
Floyd | from it.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster swings one of its legs at a tentacle, but misses.
Floyd |
eladnarra says, "hahaha"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "give helmet to goblin"
Floyd | >There is not much you can do to stuff that is inside the orb.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle hits one of the eyes of the green monster. The eye blinks.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster swings one of its legs at a tentacle, but misses.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "oh"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "tango"
Floyd | >"Tango!"
Floyd | The coat turns invisible. You on the other hand do not. The gremlin
Floyd | snickers at your boxer shorts.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle plunges down towards your feet, but you manage to jump away
Floyd | from it.
Floyd |
Floyd | All the eyes of the green monster swivel round and stare at the
Floyd | tentacle monster.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "hee hee"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "tango"
Floyd | >"Tango!"
Floyd | The coat turns visible.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle hits one of the eyes of the green monster. The eye blinks.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster tries to hit you with the claws of one foot, but you
Floyd | manage to step back just in time.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "waltz"
Floyd | >That's not a verb I recognise.
Floyd |
eladnarra says, "I wonder if you can trap yourself in the orb. not a helpful action, but interesting."
DavidW says, "Try it."
inky says (to Floyd), "hit me with staff"
Floyd | >Suddenly everything looks slightly different.
Floyd |
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd | A huge monster is crouching on the ledge. Its green skin is scaly, its
Floyd | body is bloated like a balloon, its four feet have long terrible claws,
Floyd | its wide mouth has thousands of sharp teeth and on top of its head is a
Floyd | cluster of about fifty bulging eyes as big as your head.
Floyd |
Floyd | A mail-ordered short metal staff with a clear orb on the end lies here.
Floyd | Its manufacturers say the staff will remove any creature that comes in
Floyd | contact with the orb. Inside the orb you can see the goblin sidekick.
Floyd | He is now tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | A gigantic monster is here. It seem to consist entirely of a cluster of
Floyd | many entwined writhing turquoise tentacles. There are no legs or arms
Floyd | or head. Each tentacle is as thick as a person and none seem to be
Floyd | shorter than five meters.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle grabs the tongue of the green monster and begins to pull.
Floyd | But the tongue pulls back, and the tentacle is dragged into the mouth
Floyd | of the green monster. The green monster bites off the end of the
Floyd | tentacle. The wounded tentacle, bleeding dark blue liquid, withdraws
Floyd | into the cluster of tentacles. The green monster chews on the tip of
Floyd | the tentacle for a while then swallows.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster roars.
Floyd |
inky says, "hmm, I don't understand"
DavidW says, "oh. heh. I get it."
DavidW says, "It's not obvious, but you freed the goblin, and he, as a loyal sidekick, hit himself with the staff to re-entrap him and free you -- so the monsters have changed position, and the goblin can't tell you what he did."
inky says, "wow, fancy"
DavidW says, "This is more clear later on that he'll do that for you."
eladnarra says, "so very loyal"
DavidW says, "Loyal up to a point."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to goblin"
Floyd | >There is not much you can do to stuff that is inside the orb.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle plunges down towards your feet, but you manage to jump away
Floyd | from it.
Floyd |
Floyd | All the eyes of the green monster swivel round and stare at you.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "He didn't take the slashing sword, remember."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to green monster"
Floyd | >"Who are you?" you ask, but the monster ignores you.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle wraps around the green monster's head. The monster scratches
Floyd | the tentacle with its claws, and the tentacle withdraws.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster's tongue shoots out towards your head, but you duck.
Floyd |
eladnarra says, "true"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "kill frog"
Floyd | >You throw yourself against the monster. The monster smacks you with
Floyd | one of its legs, and you are slammed into the mountain wall.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle plunges down towards your feet, but you manage to jump away
Floyd | from it.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster's tongue shoots out towards your head, but you duck.
Floyd |
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >A Supreme crossbow (loaded)
Floyd | A manual
Floyd | A cage (with a gremlin) (closed and locked)
Floyd | A helmet
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | A coat (visible)
Floyd | A ring
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
eladnarra asks, "have we messed around with the cage yet?"
DavidW says, "not yet."
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "i"
Floyd | >A Remmingheim Supreme crossbow, loaded with an arrow. The Supreme
Floyd | model is supposed to have a special feature. When you shoot it, the
Floyd | arrow will magically return, and the crossbow will be loaded again. The
Floyd | hard, razor-sharp arrow is protruding a good ten centimeters from the
Floyd | front of the crossbow.
Floyd | "The Ultimate Creature Manual" by Arthur Hippoman. According to the
Floyd | back it contains information about every single monster in the world,
Floyd | and how to defend yourself against them. It is suspiciously thin.
Floyd | A small cage. It is closed and locked with a code-lock (You know the
Floyd | code.). A gremlin, a small green humanoid creature with pointy ears, is
Floyd | trapped inside. He is wearing a tiny ring. He is smoking a tiny
Floyd | cigarette. His thin arms are sticking through the bars of the cage, and
Floyd | he is fiddling with the code-lock, trying one combination at a time.
Floyd | A Super Champion Helmet. It is round and made of thin metal. It was
Floyd | supposed to magically turn you into a hero.
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | A Hustlespleen & Poe Coat of Invisibility, though at the moment it
Floyd | looks like an ordinary, long, brown, coat. It is supposed to turn
Floyd | invisible (or turn visible again) whenever you say the magic word
Floyd | "tango".
Floyd | On your finger is a Snuffelburg & Co. Type F Magical Ring. It is red
Floyd | and golden. It is supposed to protect you from any magical rays, by
Floyd | moving the effect of the ray away from you and onto the gremlin, which
Floyd | is wearing a smaller, magically connected, ring.
Floyd | A pair of red boxer shorts, decorated with tiny teddy-bears dressed as
Floyd | sailors. They are not something you are supposed to test; they are your
Floyd | own.
Floyd |
Jizaboz asks, "unlock it?"
djfletch says, "yeah try it"
eladnarra says, "might as well, can always undo"
Jizaboz says (to floyd), "unlock cage"
Floyd | >You unlock the code-lock. The gremlin jumps out of the cage. Then he
Floyd | runs giggling into the northern cave. You sigh and throw away the cage.
Floyd | You have tried catching gremlins before, and you know you'll never be
Floyd | able to.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle wraps around the green monster's head. The monster scratches
Floyd | the tentacle with its claws, and the tentacle withdraws.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster swings one of its legs at a tentacle, but misses.
Floyd |
Jizaboz says, "Hmm"
DavidW says, "If you want to undo, do so now."
Jizaboz says (to floyd), "undo"
Floyd | >On a mountain ledge
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
djfletch says, "probably there is some magic ray puzzle sometime"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to gremlin"
Floyd | >"Hey, how are you doing in there?" you ask.
Floyd | "I'm suffocating," the gremlin says. "Unless you let me out soon I'll
Floyd | die!"
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle grabs hold of one of the eyes of the green monster and
Floyd | begins to pull. The eye is pulled away from the eye cluster, but is
Floyd | still attached with what appears to be a pink rubbery string. The
Floyd | string gets stretched pretty far, and for a moment it seems as if it is
Floyd | going to break. Then the tentacle lets go and the eye snaps back into
Floyd | the cluster. The eyes wobble like jelly. Then they blink, and the green
Floyd | monster looks a bit confused.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster tries to hit you with the claws of one foot, but you
Floyd | manage to step back just in time.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "shoot frog with crossbow"
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "read 1"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. The arrow magically returns to the crossbow and
Floyd | the crossbow is loaded again. Huh? That happened fast. The arrow did
Floyd | not even have time to leave the crossbow entirely! In fact, it barely
Floyd | moved!
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle grabs hold of one of the eyes of the green monster and
Floyd | begins to pull. The eye is pulled away from the eye cluster, but is
Floyd | still attached with what appears to be a pink rubbery string. The
Floyd | string gets stretched pretty far, and for a moment it seems as if it is
Floyd | going to break. Then the tentacle lets go and the eye snaps back into
Floyd | the cluster. The eyes wobble like jelly. Then they blink, and the green
Floyd | monster looks a bit confused.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster's tongue shoots out towards your legs, but you manage
Floyd | to jump to the side.
Floyd |
Floyd | >On the front is a badly drawn picture of three monsters running away
Floyd | from a man who is holding a copy of the book over his head.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle grabs your arm, and you are pulled towards the cluster. You
Floyd | hit the tentacle and it lets go.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster stares at you and licks itself around the mouth. Then
Floyd | it opens its mouth wide, roars, and determinedly begins walking towards
Floyd | you. Uh-Oh!
Floyd |
eladnarra says, "uh oh, indeed"
Jizaboz says (to floyd), "i"
Floyd | >A Remmingheim Supreme crossbow, loaded with an arrow. The Supreme
Floyd | model is supposed to have a special feature. When you shoot it, the
Floyd | arrow will magically return, and the crossbow will be loaded again. The
Floyd | hard, razor-sharp arrow is protruding a good ten centimeters from the
Floyd | front of the crossbow.
Floyd | "The Ultimate Creature Manual" by Arthur Hippoman. According to the
Floyd | back it contains information about every single monster in the world,
Floyd | and how to defend yourself against them. It is suspiciously thin.
Floyd | A small cage. It is closed and locked with a code-lock (You know the
Floyd | code.). A gremlin, a small green humanoid creature with pointy ears, is
Floyd | trapped inside. He is wearing a tiny ring. He is smoking a tiny
Floyd | cigarette. His thin arms are sticking through the bars of the cage, and
Floyd | he is fiddling with the code-lock, trying one combination at a time.
Floyd | A Super Champion Helmet. It is round and made of thin metal. It was
Floyd | supposed to magically turn you into a hero.
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | A Hustlespleen & Poe Coat of Invisibility, though at the moment it
Floyd | looks like an ordinary, long, brown, coat. It is supposed to turn
Floyd | invisible (or turn visible again) whenever you say the magic word
Floyd | "tango".
Floyd | On your finger is a Snuffelburg & Co. Type F Magical Ring. It is red
Floyd | and golden. It is supposed to protect you from any magical rays, by
Floyd | moving the effect of the ray away from you and onto the gremlin, which
Floyd | is wearing a smaller, magically connected, ring.
Floyd | A pair of red boxer shorts, decorated with tiny teddy-bears dressed as
Floyd | sailors. They are not something you are supposed to test; they are your
Floyd | own.
Floyd |
djfletch asks, "shall we run away?"
DavidW says, "I don't remember how I got past the frog, but I have an idea we haven't tried yet."
djfletch says, "I wonder if we can throw the sword before it kills us"
DavidW says (to dj), "oh good. That was my idea."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >As you are about to go, a tentacle wraps itself around one of your
Floyd | legs. You fall, and are pulled back. You manage to untangle your leg.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle grabs the tongue of the green monster and begins to pull.
Floyd | But the tongue pulls back, and the tentacle is dragged into the mouth
Floyd | of the green monster. The green monster bites off the end of the
Floyd | tentacle. The wounded tentacle, bleeding dark blue liquid, withdraws
Floyd | into the cluster of tentacles. The green monster chews on the tip of
Floyd | the tentacle for a while then swallows.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster's tongue shoots out and wraps itself around your
Floyd | waist. You are pulled into the monster's mouth and chewed to little
Floyd | pieces.
Floyd |
Floyd |     *** You're passed on! You are no more! You have ceased to be!
Floyd | You're expired and gone to meet your maker! You're a stiff! Bereft of
Floyd | life, you rest in peace! If you weren't nailed to the perch you'd be
Floyd | pushing up the daisies! Your metabolic processes are now 'istory!
Floyd | You're off the twig! You're kicked the bucket, you're shuffled off your
Floyd | mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir
Floyd | invisible!! YOU ARE AN EX-PRODUCT TESTER!! ***
Floyd |
Floyd |
Floyd | In that game you scored 1 out of a possible 100, in 54 turns. You get
Floyd | reincarnated as a germ, living in the left pinky toe of Else Mogen, a
Floyd | neurotic hairdresser from Copenhagen.
Floyd | Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, UNDO your last move or
Floyd | QUIT?
djfletch says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | > On a mountain ledge
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
Gunther has had his fill of playing for now, and goes back to the Lounge. DavidW says, "try again"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >As you are about to go, a tentacle wraps itself around one of your
Floyd | arms and pulls you back. You hit the tentacle with your free arm and it
Floyd | lets go.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle grabs the tongue of the green monster and begins to pull.
Floyd | But the tongue pulls back, and the tentacle is dragged into the mouth
Floyd | of the green monster. The green monster bites off the end of the
Floyd | tentacle. The wounded tentacle, bleeding dark blue liquid, withdraws
Floyd | into the cluster of tentacles. The green monster chews on the tip of
Floyd | the tentacle for a while then swallows.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster's tongue shoots out and wraps itself around your
Floyd | waist. You are pulled into the monster's mouth and chewed to little
Floyd | pieces.
Floyd |
Floyd |     *** You sleep with the fishes. ***
Floyd |
Floyd |
Floyd | In that game you scored 1 out of a possible 100, in 54 turns. You get
Floyd | reincarnated as a germ, living in the left pinky toe of Else Mogen, a
Floyd | neurotic hairdresser from Copenhagen.
Floyd | Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, UNDO your last move or
Floyd | QUIT?
Jizaboz says, "Argh, yeah I should get going too.. was dun though"
djfletch says, "we may have to restart"
Jizaboz says, "Fun rather"
DavidW says (to dj), "I don't think so."
Jizaboz goes home.
djfletch says (to Floyd), "undo"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | > On a mountain ledge
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
Floyd | >On a mountain ledge
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >As you are about to go, a tentacle wraps itself around one of your
Floyd | arms and pulls you back. You hit the tentacle with your free arm and it
Floyd | lets go.
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle grabs hold of one of the eyes of the green monster and
Floyd | begins to pull. The eye is pulled away from the eye cluster, but is
Floyd | still attached with what appears to be a pink rubbery string. The
Floyd | string gets stretched pretty far, and for a moment it seems as if it is
Floyd | going to break. Then the tentacle lets go and the eye snaps back into
Floyd | the cluster. The eyes wobble like jelly. Then they blink, and the green
Floyd | monster looks a bit confused.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster's tongue shoots out and wraps itself around your
Floyd | waist. You are pulled into the monster's mouth and chewed to little
Floyd | pieces.
Floyd |
Floyd |     *** You have been terminated. ***
Floyd |
Floyd |
Floyd | In that game you scored 1 out of a possible 100, in 54 turns. You get
Floyd | reincarnated as a germ, living in the left pinky toe of Else Mogen, a
Floyd | neurotic hairdresser from Copenhagen.
Floyd | Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, UNDO your last move or
Floyd | QUIT?
DavidW says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | > On a mountain ledge
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "hit frog with staff"
Floyd | >First taking the staff.
Floyd | Taken.
Floyd | The huge monster vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin sidekick appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the huge monster is inside the orb now, tiny and
Floyd | unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin says, "Gee boss, I am kind of confused about what just
Floyd | happened. But I saw you had become this tiny frozen figure inside the
Floyd | orb. I figured I had to try and rescue you, so I touched the orb. I
Floyd | don't know exactly what happened then, but now here you are."
Floyd |
Floyd | A tentacle chases the goblin around for a while.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "hit monster with staff"
Floyd | >The gigantic tentacle monster vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The huge green monster appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the gigantic tentacle monster is inside the orb now,
Floyd | tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster roars.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading west and east.
Floyd | Not all that far to the east, near the end of the ledge, a huge monster
Floyd | is crouching. Its green skin is scaly, its body is bloated like a
Floyd | balloon, its four feet have long terrible claws, its wide mouth has
Floyd | thousands of sharp teeth and on top of its head is a cluster of about
Floyd | fifty bulging eyes as big as your head.
Floyd |
Floyd | The new magical sword from Adventurer's Emporium is here. According to
Floyd | the commercial it will start to vibrate when you are close to danger.
Floyd | It is shaking like crazy.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "take sword"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
Floyd | You have a hard time holding on to the sword, and you have to struggle
Floyd | to keep from slashing yourself.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "throw sword at frog"
Floyd | >The monster is too far away.
Floyd |
Floyd | You have a hard time holding on to the sword, and you have to struggle
Floyd | to keep from slashing yourself.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "look up sword in book"
Floyd | >You discover nothing of interest in the Creature Manual.
Floyd |
eladnarra says, "darn"
djfletch asks, "do we die straight away if we go east with it?"
DavidW says, "yes"
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "read 2"
Floyd | >So, you have spotted a monster. How many legs does it have?
Floyd | None: read page 3
Floyd | One: read page 35
Floyd | Two: read page 36
Floyd | Three: read page 62
Floyd | Four: read page 63
Floyd | Six: read page 86
Floyd | Eight: read page 87
Floyd | Forty eight billion and five: read page 90
Floyd | It varies: read page 91
Floyd |
Floyd | You have a hard time holding on to the sword, and you have to struggle
Floyd | to keep from slashing yourself.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "Instead of turning blue like other swords, this one vibrates."
eladnarra says, "they shoulda gone with the classic Sting glow :D"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "give helmet to goblin"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | You give the Super Champion Helmet to the goblin.
Floyd |
Floyd | IMPORTANT NOTE: If you forget what items the goblin has, you can ask
Floyd | him with "Goblin, Inventory". This note will not be repeated.
Floyd |
Floyd | You have a hard time holding on to the sword, and you have to struggle
Floyd | to keep from slashing yourself.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "I don't know if it will help him at all"
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "goblin, put on helmet"
Floyd | >"I don't need a helmet to be a hero."
Floyd |
Floyd | You have a hard time holding on to the sword, and you have to struggle
Floyd | to keep from slashing yourself.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "oh wait. We might be able to use the arrow."
DavidW says (to Floyd), "drop sword"
Floyd | >Dropped.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd | A huge monster is crouching on the ledge. Its green skin is scaly, its
Floyd | body is bloated like a balloon, its four feet have long terrible claws,
Floyd | its wide mouth has thousands of sharp teeth and on top of its head is a
Floyd | cluster of about fifty bulging eyes as big as your head.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The green monster's tongue shoots out towards your head, but you duck.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "stab frog with arrow"
Floyd | >You slam the crossbow, arrow first, into the monster's belly. The
Floyd | monster explodes like a balloon, leaving no remains. So not quite like
Floyd | a balloon then.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by five points.]
Floyd |
inky says, "oh, heh"
inky says, "so all this was a distraction, hunh"
eladnarra says, "oh. that's much simpler :D"
DavidW says, "I remembered inky cutting the strap with the arrow, so the arrow was like a knife here, too."
DavidW says, "And now we can take the sword again."
eladnarra asks, "should we try to vanquish the tentacle monster?"
eladnarra says, "oright, never mind"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading west and east.
Floyd |
Floyd | The new magical sword from Adventurer's Emporium is here. According to
Floyd | the commercial it will start to vibrate when you are close to danger.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "take sword"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
eladnarra says, "wouldn't be able to get goblin back >_>"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword starts vibrating ever so slightly.
Floyd |
DavidW asks, "hm. A new threat nearby?"
DavidW says, "also, three caves to choose from."
djfletch says, "pick a random cave"
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the south, or you can go
Floyd | further into the mountain to the north.
Floyd | A burly barbarian is leaning against a wall, his arms crossed over his
Floyd | naked chest, a grim expression on his face. A long sabre is in his
Floyd | belt.
Floyd | A tough-looking dwarf, wearing chain mail and a helmet, is sitting on
Floyd | the floor. He is holding an axe almost as big as himself. He is smoking
Floyd | a pipe.
Floyd | A muscular white horse and a mangy donkey stand here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword starts shaking quite a lot.
Floyd |
eladnarra says, "random cave it is"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to barbarian"
Floyd | >(the barbarian)
Floyd | "What are you doing?" you ask.
Floyd | "Grirgr and the dwarf were sent to look for treasures. But Grirgr not
Floyd | stupid! He thinks, why risk our lives? So we wait here until somebody
Floyd | else finds treasure! Then we buy it!"
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to dwarf"
Floyd | >"So, been here long?" you say. The dwarf nods.
Floyd |
eladnarra says, "hahaha"
djfletch asks, "try going north?"
eladnarra asks, "but what about the sword?"
DavidW says, "sure, but be careful of the sword slashing us."
djfletch says, "oh right, good point"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "drop sword" DavidW says, "we might just leave the sword in the entry cave."
Floyd | >Dropped.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the north. There is
Floyd | also an exit to the south.
Floyd | A red automat, hundred of meters tall, stands in the middle of the
Floyd | cave. Despite the insane magnitude of the machine, its money-slot and
Floyd | buttons are normal-sized and placed at normal height. The
Floyd | merchandise-slot is also close to the floor, but huge enough to hold a
Floyd | horse. You have come across these automats before. Several companies
Floyd | have recently begun placing them in dangerous places, for adventurers
Floyd | who need equipment. They are easy to use; just buy something. Something
Floyd | is written on the automat next to the buttons.
Floyd | A stone altar stands up against a wall. It is low, shadowy,
Floyd | bloodstained and has runes written on it. Next to it is a huge pile of
Floyd | fish bones.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "read automat"
Floyd | >Adventurer's Emporium's Convenient Equipment Automat: for everything
Floyd | an adventurer needs.
Floyd |   30 gold coins     Wheelbarrow
Floyd |   35 gold coins     Umbrella
Floyd |   35 gold coins     Roller skates
Floyd |   35 gold coins     Pogo stick
Floyd |   35 gold coins     Giant rubber band
Floyd |   40 gold coins     Spell of summoning: Aardvark
Floyd |   40 gold coins     Spell of metamorphosis: Chicken
Floyd |   40 gold coins     Lie detector pants
Floyd |   40 gold coins     Magical bag of unlimited water balloons
Floyd |   50 gold coins     Spell of summoning: Lawyer
Floyd |   50 gold coins     Spell of metamorphosis: Giant Sloth
Floyd |   50 gold coins     King-size box of assorted fireworks
Floyd |   50 gold coins     Horse
Floyd | 100 gold coins     Platoon of miniature zombies
Floyd | 500 gold coins     Necronomicon
Floyd |
dsimon says, "If we could just dull the sword somehow it would be a lot more useful"
dsimon says, "Oh god, lie detecting pants"
dsimon says, "They must catch on fire in the presence of mistruth"
djfletch says, "heh"
eladnarra says, "haha"
DavidW says, "40 gold coins, and they're yours."
eladnarra says, "so... we don't have money, do we"
DavidW says, "We have 0 gold coins. Correct."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get fish bones"
Floyd | >Never mind the pile of fish bones.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "sit on altar"
Floyd | >NO WAY!
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "read runes"
Floyd | >At the top of the altar is a long string of small crudely drawn runes.
Floyd | The first depicts a large man punching a small man. The second a large
Floyd | man pushing a small man. The third a large man giving a small man a
Floyd | wedgie. There are many more with similar motifs. You have seen runes
Floyd | like this before. They mean that this is an altar of Snurgelfjekk, the
Floyd | cat-headed god of bullies. At the center of the altar is a larger, more
Floyd | detailed rune. It depicts the altar and two people. One of the people
Floyd | is playing a saxophone. The other is putting something on the altar;
Floyd | you can't quite make out what it is supposed to be. Lines are coming
Floyd | out in all directions from the altar, perhaps representing light or
Floyd | heat.
Floyd |
eladnarra asks, "but if we find treasure, we can sell it to the barbarian and dwarf and get money, maybe?"
DavidW says (to eladnarra), "They said they will buy treasure, yup."
eladnarra says, "just thinking that it would be cool to try the automat, if we can :D"
djfletch says, "we must need to put a fish on this altar"
DavidW says, "Cat headed gods probably like fish, yes."
eladnarra asks, "hm... north?"
DavidW clears the save counter.
DavidW says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "cf1"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "sure"
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >You try, but the bright light is too strong. It hurts your eyes.
Floyd |
eladnarra asks, "well, that narrows it down a bit. time to find a fish~?"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get helmet"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "wear helmet"
Floyd | >You can't make yourself put on the helmet again. It is just too
Floyd | idiotic.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "thought it might cover our eyes but apparently not"
djfletch says, "yes, try another cave I suppose"
DavidW says, "south twice, then either nw or ne."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the south, or you can go
Floyd | further into the mountain to the north.
Floyd | A burly barbarian is leaning against a wall, his arms crossed over his
Floyd | naked chest, a grim expression on his face. A long sabre is in his
Floyd | belt.
Floyd | A tough-looking dwarf, wearing chain mail and a helmet, is sitting on
Floyd | the floor. He is holding an axe almost as big as himself. He is smoking
Floyd | a pipe.
Floyd | A muscular white horse and a mangy donkey stand here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The new magical sword from Adventurer's Emporium is here. According to
Floyd | the commercial it will start to vibrate when you are close to danger.
Floyd | It is shaking quite a lot.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get sword"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword calms down, and is now only vibrating ever so slightly.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "nw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Big cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit southeast to the outside, or you could go further
Floyd | into the mountain to the northwest.
Floyd | A somewhat larger than life-size statue of his holiness One-Hand Jack
Floyd | stands in the middle of the cave. Jack used to be an infamous pirate,
Floyd | but later formed Hoverism, a peaceful religion. The statue holds its
Floyd | left arm out and up, the hook at the end of it just low enough to be
Floyd | reached.
Floyd | An old Hoverist is hovering about a meter above the floor. He is
Floyd | sitting in the lotus position, his head is turned towards the statue,
Floyd | and his eyes are closed. He is wearing a white loincloth.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword starts shaking quite a lot.
Floyd |
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "drop sword"
Floyd | >Dropped.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to hoverist"
Floyd | >"What are you doing?" you ask.
Floyd | The Hoverist opens his eyes and looks at you. "I am trying to reach the
Floyd | forty-seventh stage of Hoverism. I can teach you about Hoverism if you
Floyd | like. The first stage is to be able to hover. You have to figure out
Floyd | how to do that for yourself. Once you know how to hover come talk to me
Floyd | again, and I will teach you the second stage."
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "hover"
Floyd | >You don't know how to do that. Maybe there is some way to fake it.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "jump"
Floyd | >If you are thinking of jumping up and down to convince the Hoverist
Floyd | that you can hover, I think you are underestimating him.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "ha"
inky says, "hee hee"
DavidW says, "nice try though"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "hang from hook"
Floyd | >You jump up and grab the hook. You hang there dangling.
Floyd |
inky says, "hmm"
inky says, "I think something with the invisibility cloak"
inky says (to Floyd), "talk to hoverist"
Floyd | >"Hey old guy," you say "look at me! I am hovering!"
Floyd | The Hoverist looks at you and says, "True, your feet are not touching
Floyd | the ground. But it doesn't count if you are holding on to that hook!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "drop hook"
Floyd | >You drop down.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hang from hook"
Floyd | >You jump up and grab the hook. You hang there dangling.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "put cloak on hook"
Floyd | >That's a bit awkward when you are hanging from the hook.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "drop hook"
Floyd | >You drop down.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "put cloak on hook"
Floyd | >You take off the coat.
Floyd | You hang the coat on the hook.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "tango"
Floyd | >"Tango!"
Floyd | The coat turns invisible.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hang from hook"
Floyd | >That's a bit awkward with the coat hanging from the hook. Try hanging
Floyd | from the coat.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hang from coat"
Floyd | >You grab hold of the coat. You hang there dangling.
Floyd | "Hey old guy," you say "look at me! I am hovering!"
Floyd | The Hoverist looks at you and says, "Excellent, albeit a very strange
Floyd | and dangling hovering technique. I will now teach you the second stage
Floyd | of Hoverism: Facing pain."
Floyd |
Floyd | The Hoverist spends some time teaching you how to face pain. You will
Floyd | still feel the pain, but you are no longer afraid of it.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by five points.]
Floyd |
djfletch says, "woo"
DavidW says, "cool."
eladnarra says, "maybe that means we can stand the bright light now"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "cf2"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "The light wasn't painful."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "drop"
Floyd | >(the coat)
Floyd | You drop down.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get coat"
Floyd | >You decide to leave the coat. You can't think of any other uses you
Floyd | can get from it.
Floyd |
DavidW says, ">You decide you'd like a smaller inventory too."
eladnarra says, "'You try, but the bright light is too strong. It hurts your eyes.'"
eladnarra says, "*shrugs*"
djfletch asks, "try northwest from here first?"
DavidW says, "careful. Sword was vibrating."
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >A staff (with tentacles)
Floyd | A Supreme crossbow (loaded)
Floyd | A manual
Floyd | A cage (with a gremlin) (closed and locked)
Floyd | A helmet
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | A ring
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
DavidW asks, "oh, did we drop the sword?"
eladnarra says, "yup, already dropped"
DavidW says, "ok."
eladnarra says, "northwest sounds good~"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "nw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Large cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the northwest and southeast.
Floyd | A huge black safe stands here, closed. Due to the unevenness of the
Floyd | cave floor, there is a gap between the safe and the floor, big enough
Floyd | for somebody to crawl down into.
Floyd | A shoal of small fish crawls around on the floor. They look creepy.
Floyd | Their skins are white and look almost transparent. Their eyes are also
Floyd | white and don't have pupils.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
eladnarra exclaims, "yay, fish!"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get fish"
Floyd | >You manage to catch a sluggish fish.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "open safe"
Floyd | >You try some random combinations, but the safe remains locked.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "enter gap"
Floyd | >
Floyd | A tight room
Floyd | This is a tight tiny room formed between the safe and the uneven floor.
Floyd | You can barely move. Unfortunately the safe seems to be just as solid
Floyd | on the underside. The only way out is up.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin crawls in with you. Your bodies are pushed together. "This
Floyd | is uncomfortable," the goblin mutters.
Floyd |
eladnarra says, "heh"
djfletch says, "maybe we get some dynamite to use in this room"
DavidW says, "That's a good idea."
DavidW says, "If you can find any dynamite, of course."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "u"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Large cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the northwest and southeast.
Floyd | A huge black safe stands here, closed. Due to the unevenness of the
Floyd | cave floor, there is a gap between the safe and the floor, big enough
Floyd | for somebody to crawl down into.
Floyd | A shoal of small fish crawls around on the floor. They look creepy.
Floyd | Their skins are white and look almost transparent. Their eyes are also
Floyd | white and don't have pupils.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin crawls out from under the safe.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "keep going northwest I suppose"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "nw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Enormous cave
Floyd | The only exit from this cave is to the southeast.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd |
Floyd | A bottle of the dreaded Dante Tomato Sauce, Triple-Extra Spicy stands
Floyd | here. Something is written on it. It is closed.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "read runes"
Floyd | >You try, but the runes start swimming before your eyes. It is
Floyd | impossible to get any meaning from them. All you get is a slight
Floyd | headache. As soon as you avert your eyes, you can't even remember what
Floyd | the runes looked like. You have come across this phenomenon on a couple
Floyd | of previous product testing missions, so you know the reason. The runes
Floyd | are goblin runes; magical runes that can only be read by goblins.
Floyd |
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "read bottle"
Floyd | >The makers of Dante Tomato Sauce take no responsibility for any throat
Floyd | pain, heartburns, ulcers, ruined tongues or death that may be caused by
Floyd | the sauce.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "goblin, read runes"
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "goblin, read runes"
Floyd | >The goblin looks at the runes. "Oh dear, I can't read them," he says.
Floyd | "Do the runes swim before your eyes?" you ask, surprised.
Floyd | "Oh no, nothing like that. It's just that the runes are too small. My
Floyd | eyes aren't as good as they used to be. If only there was some way I
Floyd | could see better."
Floyd |
Floyd | >The goblin looks at the runes. "Oh dear, I can't read them," he says.
Floyd | "Do the runes swim before your eyes?" you ask, surprised.
Floyd | "Oh no, nothing like that. It's just that the runes are too small. My
Floyd | eyes aren't as good as they used to be. If only there was some way I
Floyd | could see better."
Floyd |
eladnarra says, "sorry~"
djfletch says, "hmm so we need a magnifying glass or something"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get bottle"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "maybe we can feed the sauce to a monster"
DavidW says, "Possibly."
djfletch says, "anyway, may as well explore the other cave I suppose"
DavidW says, "mmhm"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "se"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Large cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the northwest and southeast.
Floyd | A huge black safe stands here, closed. Due to the unevenness of the
Floyd | cave floor, there is a gap between the safe and the floor, big enough
Floyd | for somebody to crawl down into.
Floyd | A shoal of small fish crawls around on the floor. They look creepy.
Floyd | Their skins are white and look almost transparent. Their eyes are also
Floyd | white and don't have pupils.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "se"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Big cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit southeast to the outside, or you could go further
Floyd | into the mountain to the northwest.
Floyd | A somewhat larger than life-size statue of his holiness One-Hand Jack
Floyd | stands in the middle of the cave. Jack used to be an infamous pirate,
Floyd | but later formed Hoverism, a peaceful religion. The statue holds its
Floyd | left arm out and up, the hook at the end of it just low enough to be
Floyd | reached.
Floyd | An old Hoverist is hovering about a meter above the floor. He is
Floyd | sitting in the lotus position, his head is turned towards the statue,
Floyd | and his eyes are closed. He is wearing a white loincloth.
Floyd |
Floyd | Though you cannot see it, you know that a Hustlespleen & Poe Coat of
Floyd | Invisibility hangs on the hook. It is supposed to turn visible (or turn
Floyd | invisible again) whenever you say the magic word "tango".
Floyd |
Floyd | The new magical sword from Adventurer's Emporium is here. According to
Floyd | the commercial it will start to vibrate when you are close to danger.
Floyd | It is shaking like crazy.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword goes even crazier and starts thrashing like a headless
Floyd | chicken on drugs.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get sword"
Floyd | >You are unable to control the sword, and are cut into little pieces.
Floyd |
Floyd |     *** You have given up the ghost. ***
Floyd |
Floyd |
Floyd | In that game you scored 11 out of a possible 100, in 113 turns. You get
Floyd | reincarnated as A SHRUBBERY!
Floyd | Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, UNDO your last move or
Floyd | QUIT?
djfletch says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | > Big cave
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
djfletch asks, "oh, the sauce is the danger?"
DavidW says, "Oh, yeah."
djfletch says, "I'll leave the sword here for now then"
DavidW says, "You can't carry the sword and the sauce at the same time."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "se"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "ne"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Vast cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the southwest. In the middle
Floyd | of the ceiling, high above you, is a round hole. On the floor, directly
Floyd | under the hole, is a pile of hay.
Floyd | A short lever with a handle sticks out from a wall. The handle has a
Floyd | thin, wide gap, large enough for the fingers of one hand to go through.
Floyd | A metallic pyramid, about half a meter high, sticks up from the cave
Floyd | floor. You once tested a hundred different teleporters, and you
Floyd | recognize the pyramid as one of the safest and least complicated
Floyd | models. To use it you just stand on it and shake the lever repeatedly.
Floyd | This particular teleporter seems badly designed though: the lever is
Floyd | far away from it, almost on the other side of the cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "I bet we have to put the sword on the lever"
DavidW says, "oooh."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "stand on pyramid"
Floyd | >You get on the teleporter.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "stand on hay"
Floyd | >Never mind the pile of hay.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "I'll go and get the sword"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "sw"
Floyd | >You'll have to get off the teleporter first.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get off"
Floyd | >You get off the teleporter.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "sw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading west and east.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "drop bottle"
Floyd | >Dropped.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "nw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Big cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit southeast to the outside, or you could go further
Floyd | into the mountain to the northwest.
Floyd | A somewhat larger than life-size statue of his holiness One-Hand Jack
Floyd | stands in the middle of the cave. Jack used to be an infamous pirate,
Floyd | but later formed Hoverism, a peaceful religion. The statue holds its
Floyd | left arm out and up, the hook at the end of it just low enough to be
Floyd | reached.
Floyd | An old Hoverist is hovering about a meter above the floor. He is
Floyd | sitting in the lotus position, his head is turned towards the statue,
Floyd | and his eyes are closed. He is wearing a white loincloth.
Floyd |
Floyd | Though you cannot see it, you know that a Hustlespleen & Poe Coat of
Floyd | Invisibility hangs on the hook. It is supposed to turn visible (or turn
Floyd | invisible again) whenever you say the magic word "tango".
Floyd |
Floyd | The new magical sword from Adventurer's Emporium is here. According to
Floyd | the commercial it will start to vibrate when you are close to danger.
Floyd | It is shaking quite a lot.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get sword"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "se"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword starts shaking like crazy.
Floyd |
Floyd | You have a hard time holding on to the sword, and you have to struggle
Floyd | to keep from slashing yourself.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "ne"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Vast cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the southwest. In the middle
Floyd | of the ceiling, high above you, is a round hole. On the floor, directly
Floyd | under the hole, is a pile of hay.
Floyd | A short lever with a handle sticks out from a wall. The handle has a
Floyd | thin, wide gap, large enough for the fingers of one hand to go through.
Floyd | A metallic pyramid, about half a meter high, sticks up from the cave
Floyd | floor. You once tested a hundred different teleporters, and you
Floyd | recognize the pyramid as one of the safest and least complicated
Floyd | models. To use it you just stand on it and shake the lever repeatedly.
Floyd | This particular teleporter seems badly designed though: the lever is
Floyd | far away from it, almost on the other side of the cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword calms down, but is still shaking quite a lot.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "put sword in lever"
Floyd | >You slide the sword into the gap. The hilt prevents the sword from
Floyd | falling through. The shaking of the sword is not enough to shake the
Floyd | handle.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "sw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading west and east.
Floyd |
Floyd | A bottle of the dreaded Dante Tomato Sauce, Triple-Extra Spicy stands
Floyd | here. Something is written on it. It is closed.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get bottle"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "ne"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Vast cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the southwest. In the middle
Floyd | of the ceiling, high above you, is a round hole. On the floor, directly
Floyd | under the hole, is a pile of hay.
Floyd | A short lever with a handle sticks out from a wall. The handle has a
Floyd | thin, wide gap, large enough for the fingers of one hand to go through.
Floyd | A metallic pyramid, about half a meter high, sticks up from the cave
Floyd | floor. You once tested a hundred different teleporters, and you
Floyd | recognize the pyramid as one of the safest and least complicated
Floyd | models. To use it you just stand on it and shake the lever repeatedly.
Floyd | This particular teleporter seems badly designed though: the lever is
Floyd | far away from it, almost on the other side of the cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | Up from the lever sticks the new magical sword from Adventurer's
Floyd | Emporium. According to the commercial it will start to vibrate when you
Floyd | are close to danger. It is shaking like crazy, but not enough to shake
Floyd | the lever.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword goes even crazier and starts thrashing like a headless
Floyd | chicken on drugs.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. There comes a low humming sound from
Floyd | the teleporter.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "cf3"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get on teleporter"
Floyd | >You get on the teleporter.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The sound from the teleporter gets
Floyd | louder.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "z"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The sound gets even louder. A few
Floyd | electrical sparks shoots up from the teleporter. Your feet tickle.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "z"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The teleporter starts shaking and
Floyd | smoking. The cave begins to fade out around you, and another cave fades
Floyd | in.
Floyd |
Floyd | Voluminous cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit to the east. In the middle of the floor is a
Floyd | round hole.
Floyd | A huge dead monster lies here, its four feet in the air. It has a
Floyd | stupid-looking face on a round gray hairless body. Its tiny eyes stare
Floyd | at nothing. The upper half of a dead pointy-eared elf is sticking out
Floyd | of its mouth. It looks like the monster choked on the elf. The elf is
Floyd | wearing a backpack.
Floyd |
Floyd | You look down at yourself. You seem unsubstantial, like a ghost. Slowly
Floyd | you begin to take on a more solid form. You hear the gremlin giggle.
Floyd | You look down. The ghostly gremlin jumps right through the bars of the
Floyd | ghostly cage. Second later you, the gremlin, the cage, and the rest of
Floyd | your possessions look normal again. The gremlin runs to the hole in the
Floyd | floor. "So long sucker!" he says and jumps through. You sigh and throw
Floyd | away the cage. You have tried catching gremlins before, and you know
Floyd | you won't be able to.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
DavidW says, "bye bye gremlin"
dsimon asks, "Should we have left the gremlin in the previous room?"
inky says, "presumably"
djfletch says, "yeah let's undo just in case"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | >Vast cave
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "drop cage"
Floyd | >The cage slides down from the teleporter.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The teleporter starts shaking and
Floyd | smoking. The cave begins to fade out around you, and another cave fades
Floyd | in.
Floyd |
Floyd | Voluminous cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit to the east. In the middle of the floor is a
Floyd | round hole.
Floyd | A huge dead monster lies here, its four feet in the air. It has a
Floyd | stupid-looking face on a round gray hairless body. Its tiny eyes stare
Floyd | at nothing. The upper half of a dead pointy-eared elf is sticking out
Floyd | of its mouth. It looks like the monster choked on the elf. The elf is
Floyd | wearing a backpack.
Floyd |
Floyd | You look down at yourself. You seem unsubstantial, like a ghost. Slowly
Floyd | you begin to take on a more solid form. Now you look normal.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get backpack"
Floyd | >Some of the monster's teeth stick through the lower half of the
Floyd | backpack, and thus the backpack is stuck. But you feel something
Floyd | inside.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "open backpack"
Floyd | >You find the following stuff in the backpack, which you take:
Floyd | A Huxoflux & Son healing gun. You tested one of these four years ago,
Floyd | and they are excellent. Just shoot anything that is wounded or sick.
Floyd | A nosehairscrew, a small intricate mechanism with many arms, spikes and
Floyd | pinchers. Part of the Guggensmith Portable Torturing Set that you
Floyd | refused to test some months ago. You are supposed to stuff it up
Floyd | someone's nose, and then twist it to cause horrendous pain.
Floyd | A pair of mirrorshades. You can see yourself in them.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "yay stuff!"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "wear shades"
Floyd | >You put on the pair of mirrorshades.
Floyd |
eladnarra says, "ah, the shades probably work on the light~"
DavidW says (to eladnarra), "mmhm"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "torture gremlin"
Floyd | >You can't see any such thing.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "oh we left him behind"
djfletch asks, "go east?"
DavidW says, "sure"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Capacious cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the west and northwest.
Floyd | A goblin woman is standing here. She is wearing a medallion, and
Floyd | carrying a purse. You are not quite sure, but with her long ears, sharp
Floyd | yellow teeth, and big feet you think she is pretty cute by goblin
Floyd | standards.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "looks like we left our goblin behind too."
inky says, "hunh, weird"
djfletch says, "maybe we could have told him to stand on the teleporter"
inky says, "I guess we should have told him to get on the teleporter"
DavidW says, "well, we didn't tell it to follow us onto the teleporter."
inky says (to Floyd), "x medallion"
Floyd | >In this game you can't examine things. Instead use either "look" to
Floyd | see descriptions of the things in the room you are in, or "inventory"
Floyd | to see descriptions of what you are carrying. You also can't use "look
Floyd | inside", "look under", "look behind", "look <direction>" or "search".
Floyd | But you can use "read".
Floyd |
inky says, "oh yeah"
djfletch says, "or maybe we have to send him separately"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "talk to goblin"
Floyd | >"Hey, what are you doing here?" you ask.
Floyd | "I work here. I'm a guard."
Floyd | "What's it like?"
Floyd | "Kind of lonely. I wish there were some other goblins around."
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "talk to goblin"
Floyd | >"Hey, what are you doing here?" you ask.
Floyd | "I work here. I'm a guard."
Floyd | "What's it like?"
Floyd | "Kind of lonely. I wish there were some other goblins around."
Floyd |
DavidW says, "hm. No more detail than that."
DavidW says, "Thought she might at least say what she's guarding."
eladnarra asks, "maybe if we try to go places she'll stop us?"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "ask goblin about guarding" DavidW says, "only one way to find out."
Floyd | >In this game you communicate by "talk to [whatever]", or by giving
Floyd | commands in this format: "goblin, give me the cow-o-meter".
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "goblin, give me the medallion"
Floyd | >"Yeah, right!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "nw"
Floyd | >The female goblin blocks your path. "You can't go in here," she says.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get purse"
Floyd | >Never mind the purse.
Floyd |
eladnarra says, "maybe we need sidekick to distract her..."
djfletch says, "yeah, let's go back and try bringing him up here"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Voluminous cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit to the east. In the middle of the floor is a
Floyd | round hole.
Floyd | A huge dead monster lies here, its four feet in the air. It has a
Floyd | stupid-looking face on a round gray hairless body. Its tiny eyes stare
Floyd | at nothing. The upper half of a dead pointy-eared elf is sticking out
Floyd | of its mouth. It looks like the monster choked on the elf. The elf is
Floyd | wearing a backpack.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "cf4"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "d"
Floyd | >You jump down the hole. You land in a pile of hay. You get up.
Floyd |
Floyd | Vast cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the southwest. In the middle
Floyd | of the ceiling, high above you, is a round hole. On the floor, directly
Floyd | under the hole, is a pile of hay.
Floyd | A short lever with a handle sticks out from a wall. The handle has a
Floyd | thin, wide gap, large enough for the fingers of one hand to go through.
Floyd | A metallic pyramid, about half a meter high, sticks up from the cave
Floyd | floor. You once tested a hundred different teleporters, and you
Floyd | recognize the pyramid as one of the safest and least complicated
Floyd | models. To use it you just stand on it and shake the lever repeatedly.
Floyd | This particular teleporter seems badly designed though: the lever is
Floyd | far away from it, almost on the other side of the cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | Up from the lever sticks the new magical sword from Adventurer's
Floyd | Emporium. According to the commercial it will start to vibrate when you
Floyd | are close to danger. It is shaking like crazy, but not enough to shake
Floyd | the lever.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a cage (which is closed) (in which is a gremlin) and the
Floyd | goblin sidekick here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword goes even crazier and starts thrashing like a headless
Floyd | chicken on drugs.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. There comes a low humming sound from
Floyd | the teleporter.
Floyd |
Floyd | The gremlin picks up a small rock from the ground. He smashes the
Floyd | code-lock with it and jumps out of the cage. Then he runs giggling
Floyd | through the southwest exit.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "dammit, lost the gremlin again"
eladnarra says, "damn gremlin"
djfletch says, "maybe we should have given him to the goblin"
DavidW says, "The gremlin, alas, can't be kept locked up. It was inevitable. Dropping him or teleporting with him will free him."
inky says, "aw"
inky says, "if you love a gremlin, set it free"
DavidW says, "We'll see how much you love him later."
eladnarra says, "that sounds ominous"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "goblin, get on teleporter"
Floyd | >The goblin gets on the teleporter.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The sound from the teleporter gets
Floyd | louder.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get on teleporter"
Floyd | >You get on the teleporter.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The sound gets even louder. A few
Floyd | electrical sparks shoots up from the teleporter. Your feet tickle. The
Floyd | goblin giggles.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "z"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The teleporter starts shaking and
Floyd | smoking. The cave begins to fade out around you, and another cave fades
Floyd | in.
Floyd |
Floyd | Voluminous cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit to the east. In the middle of the floor is a
Floyd | round hole.
Floyd | A huge dead monster lies here, its four feet in the air. It has a
Floyd | stupid-looking face on a round gray hairless body. Its tiny eyes stare
Floyd | at nothing. The upper half of a dead pointy-eared elf is sticking out
Floyd | of its mouth. It looks like the monster choked on the elf. The elf is
Floyd | wearing a backpack.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin begins to fade in next to you. You look down at yourself.
Floyd | You seem unsubstantial, like a ghost. Slowly you begin to take on a
Floyd | more solid form. Now you look normal.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Capacious cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the west and northwest.
Floyd | A goblin woman is standing here. She is wearing a medallion, and
Floyd | carrying a purse. You are not quite sure, but with her long ears, sharp
Floyd | yellow teeth, and big feet you think she is pretty cute by goblin
Floyd | standards.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | "Well, hello there!" says the female goblin and smiles.
Floyd |
Floyd | "Uh, hi," says the goblin, his cheeks turning a darker shade of green.
Floyd | They seem distracted.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "z"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "nw"
Floyd | >You sneak out. The goblins don't seem to notice.
Floyd |
Floyd | Extensive cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit to the southeast.
Floyd | On the north wall is a small round metal hatch. It is closed.
Floyd | Near the hatch is a table.
Floyd | In a corner stands a short metal garbage can. It is closed.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the table you can see:
Floyd | A long heavy-looking iron spear.
Floyd | A Remmingeim Royal crossbow. The older Royal model is almost identical
Floyd | to the Supreme. Very few but an experienced product tester like
Floyd | yourself could tell the difference. The Royal is quite good. It does
Floyd | not have the returning arrow function, but it is magically protected
Floyd | from theft and vandalism. It has an arrow identical to the one in the
Floyd | Supreme bow.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by five points.]
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "push save"
Floyd | >You can't see any such thing.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "cf5"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get spear"
Floyd | >The spear is too heavy for that.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get royal"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "open can"
Floyd | >You open the garbage can. It is empty.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "open hatch"
Floyd | >It is locked.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get table"
Floyd | >The table is too heavy for that.
Floyd |
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "unlock hatch"
Floyd | >What do you want to unlock the hatch with?
Floyd |
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "arrow"
Floyd | >Which do you mean, the Royal arrow or the Supreme arrow?
Floyd |
eladnarra says (to Floyd), "supreme"
Floyd | >(first taking the Supreme arrow)
Floyd | You attempt to get the arrow from the crossbow, but almost immediately
Floyd | it disappears from your grip and reappears in the crossbow.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get royal arrow"
Floyd | >Just as you are about to take the arrow, the crossbow wiggles out of
Floyd | your grip. It hangs hovering in the air for a moment.Then it flies away
Floyd | and lands on the table.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "hit hatch with supreme"
Floyd | >You smash the crossbow into the hatch, but it is pretty solid.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get royal arrow"
Floyd | >You try, but the crossbow starts wiggling around, making it
Floyd | impossible.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fire royal arrow"
Floyd | >First taking the Royal crossbow.
Floyd | Taken.
Floyd | Just as you are about to pull the trigger the crossbow wiggles out of
Floyd | your grip. It flies away and lands on the table. That theft protection
Floyd | is pretty good!
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get royal bow"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "put bow in can"
Floyd | >Which do you mean, the Royal crossbow or the Supreme crossbow?
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "put royal bow in can"
Floyd | >You put the Royal crossbow into the garbage can.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "I don't know why I did that really"
djfletch says, "the garbage can must be for something though"
DavidW says, "It's possible that we need to explore more before this room makes sense."
DavidW says, "But yes, the can is good for something."
inky says, "presumably we were supposed to use the gremlin before coming here"
djfletch says, "we can do the light room, or put the fish on the altar"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "se"
Floyd | >You sneak back.
Floyd |
Floyd | Capacious cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the west and northwest.
Floyd | A goblin woman is standing here. She is wearing a medallion, and
Floyd | carrying a purse. You are not quite sure, but with her long ears, sharp
Floyd | yellow teeth, and big feet you think she is pretty cute by goblin
Floyd | standards. She is staring at your sidekick, looking rather distracted.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see the goblin sidekick here.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >"Come along now," you say to the goblin as you leave.
Floyd |
Floyd | Voluminous cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit to the east. In the middle of the floor is a
Floyd | round hole.
Floyd | A huge dead monster lies here, its four feet in the air. It has a
Floyd | stupid-looking face on a round gray hairless body. Its tiny eyes stare
Floyd | at nothing. The upper half of a dead pointy-eared elf is sticking out
Floyd | of its mouth. It looks like the monster choked on the elf. The elf is
Floyd | wearing a backpack.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin reluctantly walks in from the east, throwing several glances
Floyd | over his shoulder.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "d"
Floyd | >You jump down the hole. You land in a pile of hay. You hear someone
Floyd | shouting, "Wheeeeeee!" and you look up. The goblin is falling right
Floyd | towards you. You quickly roll to the side, and the goblin lands in the
Floyd | hay. You two get up.
Floyd |
Floyd | Vast cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the southwest. In the middle
Floyd | of the ceiling, high above you, is a round hole. On the floor, directly
Floyd | under the hole, is a pile of hay.
Floyd | A short lever with a handle sticks out from a wall. The handle has a
Floyd | thin, wide gap, large enough for the fingers of one hand to go through.
Floyd | A metallic pyramid, about half a meter high, sticks up from the cave
Floyd | floor. You once tested a hundred different teleporters, and you
Floyd | recognize the pyramid as one of the safest and least complicated
Floyd | models. To use it you just stand on it and shake the lever repeatedly.
Floyd | This particular teleporter seems badly designed though: the lever is
Floyd | far away from it, almost on the other side of the cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | Up from the lever sticks the new magical sword from Adventurer's
Floyd | Emporium. According to the commercial it will start to vibrate when you
Floyd | are close to danger. It is shaking like crazy, but not enough to shake
Floyd | the lever.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see the goblin sidekick and a cage here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword goes even crazier and starts thrashing like a headless
Floyd | chicken on drugs.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. There comes a low humming sound from
Floyd | the teleporter.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "sw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the south, or you can go
Floyd | further into the mountain to the north.
Floyd | A burly barbarian is leaning against a wall, his arms crossed over his
Floyd | naked chest, a grim expression on his face. A long sabre is in his
Floyd | belt.
Floyd | A tough-looking dwarf, wearing chain mail and a helmet, is sitting on
Floyd | the floor. He is holding an axe almost as big as himself. He is smoking
Floyd | a pipe.
Floyd | A muscular white horse and a mangy donkey stand here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the north. There is
Floyd | also an exit to the south.
Floyd | A red automat, hundred of meters tall, stands in the middle of the
Floyd | cave. Despite the insane magnitude of the machine, its money-slot and
Floyd | buttons are normal-sized and placed at normal height. The
Floyd | merchandise-slot is also close to the floor, but huge enough to hold a
Floyd | horse. You have come across these automats before. Several companies
Floyd | have recently begun placing them in dangerous places, for adventurers
Floyd | who need equipment. They are easy to use; just buy something. Something
Floyd | is written on the automat next to the buttons.
Floyd | A stone altar stands up against a wall. It is low, shadowy,
Floyd | bloodstained and has runes written on it. Next to it is a huge pile of
Floyd | fish bones.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "cf6"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "put fish on altar"
Floyd | >(the sluggish fish on the altar)
Floyd | You put the sluggish fish on the altar.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "read runes"
Floyd | >At the top of the altar is a long string of small crudely drawn runes.
Floyd | The first depicts a large man punching a small man. The second a large
Floyd | man pushing a small man. The third a large man giving a small man a
Floyd | wedgie. There are many more with similar motifs. You have seen runes
Floyd | like this before. They mean that this is an altar of Snurgelfjekk, the
Floyd | cat-headed god of bullies. At the center of the altar is a larger, more
Floyd | detailed rune. It depicts the altar and two people. One of the people
Floyd | is playing a saxophone. The other is putting something on the altar;
Floyd | you can't quite make out what it is supposed to be. Lines are coming
Floyd | out in all directions from the altar, perhaps representing light or
Floyd | heat.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "I don't think we have a saxophone yet."
djfletch says, "true"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >A staff (with tentacles)
Floyd | A bottle (closed)
Floyd | A healing gun
Floyd | A nosehairscrew
Floyd | A Supreme crossbow (loaded)
Floyd | A manual
Floyd | A helmet
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | Mirrorshades
Floyd | A ring
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
eladnarra asks, "to the light room?"
djfletch says, "ok"
DavidW says, "sure."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can also see the gremlin here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | When the gremlin sees you, he runs away to the north.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
DavidW says, "Also, remember this room was considered dangerous re: sword vibrating."
dsimon says, "So the diamond must belong on the altar..."
inky says, "oh hmm"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take diamond"
Floyd | >This thing is really heavy. You just barely manage to pick it up. Your
Floyd | back creaks ominously.
Floyd |
inky says, "the gremlin didn't vanish from the game"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >The diamond is so heavy; you can't bear to go anywhere whilst holding
Floyd | it.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to inky), "oh no"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "drop diamond"
Floyd | >Dropped.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "push diamond south"
Floyd | >The diamond is too heavy.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get knife"
Floyd | >You pull the knife out of the pedestal. You notice the following
Floyd | things:
Floyd | 1. A mysterious click.
Floyd | 2. That the knife is very dull.
Floyd | 3. A large gap in the cave wall next to you opening up.
Floyd | 4. A metal arm with a round spinning saw-blade emerging from the gap.
Floyd | 5. The top of your head being cut off.
Floyd | 6. The arm retreating.
Floyd | 7. The gap closing.
Floyd | 8. Lots of blood gushing out of your head.
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
inky says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | >Huge cave
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
dsimon says, "hehehe"
inky says, "I wonder if that helmet would help"
inky asks, "did we throw it away?"
djfletch says, "it wouldn't let us wear it again"
DavidW says, "We have the helmet but we refuse to wear it now."
inky says, "oh well"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "touch diamond with staff"
Floyd | >Nothing happens.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "goblin, get diamond"
Floyd | >"I am afraid that is too heavy for me."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "i"
Floyd | >A mail-ordered short metal staff with a clear orb on the end. Its
Floyd | manufacturers say the staff will remove any creature that comes in
Floyd | contact with the orb. Inside the orb you can see a small unmoving
Floyd | cluster of turquoise tentacles.
Floyd | A bottle of the dreaded Dante Tomato Sauce, Triple-Extra Spicy.
Floyd | Something is written on it. It is closed.
Floyd | A Huxoflux & Son healing gun. You tested one of these four years ago,
Floyd | and they are excellent. Just shoot anything that is wounded or sick.
Floyd | A nosehairscrew, a small intricate mechanism with many arms, spikes and
Floyd | pinchers. Part of the Guggensmith Portable Torturing Set that you
Floyd | refused to test some months ago. You are supposed to stuff it up
Floyd | someone's nose, and then twist it to cause horrendous pain.
Floyd | A Remmingheim Supreme crossbow, loaded with an arrow. The Supreme model
Floyd | is supposed to have a special feature. When you shoot it, the arrow
Floyd | will magically return, and the crossbow will be loaded again. The hard,
Floyd | razor-sharp arrow is protruding a good ten centimeters from the front
Floyd | of the crossbow.
Floyd | "The Ultimate Creature Manual" by Arthur Hippoman. According to the
Floyd | back it contains information about every single monster in the world,
Floyd | and how to defend yourself against them. It is suspiciously thin.
Floyd | A Super Champion Helmet. It is round and made of thin metal. It was
Floyd | supposed to magically turn you into a hero.
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | A pair of mirrorshades. You could see yourself in them if you weren't
Floyd | wearing them.
Floyd | On your finger is a Snuffelburg & Co. Type F Magical Ring. It is red
Floyd | and golden. It is supposed to protect you from any magical rays, by
Floyd | moving the effect of the ray away from you and onto the gremlin. That
Floyd | is, if the gremlin is still wearing the smaller, magically connected,
Floyd | ring.
Floyd | A pair of red boxer shorts, decorated with tiny teddy-bears dressed as
Floyd | sailors. They are not something you are supposed to test; they are your
Floyd | own.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "maybe the barbarian can carry the diamond"
DavidW asks, "How would you get them together?"
djfletch says, "not sure - unless we can just tell him about it now"
DavidW says, "Conversation is merely 'talk to'."
inky says (to Floyd), "read dante"
Floyd | >The makers of Dante Tomato Sauce take no responsibility for any throat
Floyd | pain, heartburns, ulcers, ruined tongues or death that may be caused by
Floyd | the sauce.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "ok let's check some more rooms"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Prodigious and very hot cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the east.
Floyd | It is terribly hot here. The intolerable temperature is almost
Floyd | certainly caused by the red-hot stone oven standing in a corner.
Floyd | A stone table stands in the middle of the cave. Round it stands a stone
Floyd | throne with an old troll, a stone chair with a tall troll, a stone
Floyd | stool with a short troll, and a large stone. The trolls look a bit like
Floyd | humans made of stone, though with no necks, bigger jaws, smaller eyes
Floyd | and huge arms and hands. They are playing some kind of card game.
Floyd | A golem, a man crudely made from stone, is standing here unmoving. Some
Floyd | runes have been chiseled into his chest.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a stone saxophone here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read runes"
Floyd | >They are very old runes and the only one you understand means
Floyd | "saxophone".
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "goblin, read runes"
Floyd | >"Don't know what is says. Maybe it's an advertisement for a music
Floyd | store."
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get saxophone"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >As you are about to leave, the golem suddenly comes to life. It easily
Floyd | yanks the saxophone from your arms and puts it on the cave floor. Then
Floyd | it goes back to standing still, exactly in the same position as before.
Floyd | One of the trolls says, "Ur, oh yeah, that golem was sat there to guard
Floyd | the saxophone. That sax is some kind of holy relic or something."
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get stone"
Floyd | >The large stone is too heavy for that.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to golem"
Floyd | >(the golem)
Floyd | "Who made you?" you ask, but the golem does not respond.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to trolls"
Floyd | >You can only do that to something animate.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to tall troll"
Floyd | >"So what is this game called?" you ask.
Floyd | "Ur, troll poker."
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to old troll"
Floyd | >"Can I play?" you ask.
Floyd | "Ur, have you got any money?"
Floyd | "No."
Floyd | "Ur, then you can't play."
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to short troll"
Floyd | >"So are you guys really made of stone?" you ask.
Floyd | "Ur, dunno."
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "smash golem"
Floyd | >(the golem)
Floyd | You smash your fist into the golem, then scream in pain. The trolls
Floyd | laugh.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "touch golem with staff"
Floyd | >(the golem with the staff)
Floyd | Nothing happens. Guess golems aren't technically living.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >A staff (with tentacles)
Floyd | A bottle (closed)
Floyd | A healing gun
Floyd | A nosehairscrew
Floyd | A Supreme crossbow (loaded)
Floyd | A manual
Floyd | A helmet
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | Mirrorshades
Floyd | A ring
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "I'll try another room for now"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Tremendous Cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the
Floyd | south.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | A genie floats about a meter above the ground. He looks like a man made
Floyd | of ice. He is bald, but has a beard of icicles. He has no legs; his
Floyd | stomach rises from a small cloud of icy steam. He holds an ice sabre.
Floyd | A hippoman, half man, half hippo, stands knitting something yellow. He
Floyd | is fat, purple and has two very thick legs.
Floyd | A young angry-looking woman stands holding a large placard saying "Save
Floyd | the monsters!" She is clearly one of those monster rights activists
Floyd | that have been making your job so much harder lately.
Floyd | The gremlin has climbed quite high up on the wall. He is a small green
Floyd | humanoid creature with pointy ears. He is wearing a tiny ring and is
Floyd | smoking a tiny cigarette.
Floyd | A large metal chest stands up against a wall. It is closed.
Floyd | A large machine is at the back of the cave. Its mechanisms looks very
Floyd | complex. Actually it is very easy to use. You know this because on a
Floyd | previous product-testing mission you came across a machine just like it
Floyd | and spend four hours trying to figure out how it worked. The machine is
Floyd | for sharpening tools and weapons. Just put what you want sharpened into
Floyd | it and wait.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a big tacky holy grail here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The woman notices you and smiles. "Hello there," she says.
Floyd | The genie nods at you.
Floyd | The hippoman says, "Welcome to my humble cave."
Floyd | "I know him," says the gremlin. "He had me trapped in a cage. He is one
Floyd | of them adventurers. He goes around killing monsters."
Floyd | "What?!" shouts the woman.
Floyd | "Yeah," says the gremlin "And he once said he thought genies were a
Floyd | bunch of overrated powerless second-class ghosts."
Floyd | "Did he now?" says the genie.
Floyd | The gremlin turns to the hippoman and says, "He also told me hippomen
Floyd | stink and that you were a tub of lard!"
Floyd | The hippoman snorts angrily. He, the woman and the genie approach you.
Floyd | The hippoman punches you in the stomach saying "You disgusting human!"
Floyd | The woman hits you in the head with her placard shouting, "Go away, you
Floyd | monster molester!" The genie lifts you up by the neck with one icy
Floyd | hand, and throws you down on the floor. The three go away from you
Floyd | muttering angrily. The gremlin giggles as you get up.
Floyd |
inky says, "wow, what the hell"
djfletch says, "complicated room"
Jacqueline exclaims, "Sigh. I think I shall leave. I have mostly been getting this in ginormous text dumps due to excessive lag. I am quite sad to be missing the last Floyd of the pre-Comp season. Have fun, though!"
Jacqueline says, "I shall see you all after the IF Comp. We'll resume... on... the 20th of November, I guess."
inky says, "we could sharpen the dagger in that machine if it didn't kill us to take the dagger"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "sharpen arrow"
Floyd | >You need to be holding the Supreme arrow before you can put it into
Floyd | something else.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "sharpen crossbow"
Floyd | >That is not something that needs sharpening.
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Hm, I suppose the arrow tip is pretty sharp already, but it seems like i should be able to hold the crossbow up to the sharpening machine and sharpen it"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "torture gremlin"
Floyd | >What do you want to torture the gremlin with?
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "nosehairscrew"
Floyd | >The gremlin is too high up.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "well, it's the knife that needs sharpening, although I don't know why we need the knife yet, sharpened or not."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get grail"
Floyd | >As you are about to take it, the hippoman knocks you down. "So, trying
Floyd | to rob a poor defenseless hippoman are you?" he says.
Floyd |
inky says, "er, right"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to hippoman"
Floyd | >You try to explain, "The gremlin was lying. I have never said anything
Floyd | bad about hippomen."
Floyd | The hippoman snorts angrily. "Why should I believe a hippohater like
Floyd | you?"
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to woman"
Floyd | >You ask, "Why are you trying to save the monsters anyway?"
Floyd | "Are you kidding? Don't you know that each year 40 species of monsters
Floyd | go extinct because of adventurers?"
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to genie"
Floyd | >"So you are a genie, eh?" you say. "I wish I had a nice big treasure."
Floyd | "Dream on, transient creature."
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "open chest"
Floyd | >Just as you are about to open the chest, the genie rushes towards you
Floyd | swinging his sabre. You jump back. The genie says, "That is my chest!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "x chest"
Floyd | >In this game you can't examine things. Instead use either "look" to
Floyd | see descriptions of the things in the room you are in, or "inventory"
Floyd | to see descriptions of what you are carrying. You also can't use "look
Floyd | inside", "look under", "look behind", "look <direction>" or "search".
Floyd | But you can use "read".
Floyd |
inky says, "dammit"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "read runes"
Floyd | >"Danger of falling rocks. Please don't make any loud noises, as people
Floyd | OR MONSTERS might get hurt. And you wouldn't want that now. WOULD YOU?"
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "shout"
Floyd | >You shout as loud as you can.
Floyd |
Floyd | Rocks start falling from the ceiling. A couple of small ones hit you.
Floyd | "My head! My beautiful head!" the hippoman cries as a rock hits him.
Floyd | The goblin runs around in circles in an unsuccessful attempt to avoid
Floyd | the rocks. The genie looks pretty annoyed as a big rock bounces off his
Floyd | head. "Oh, won't somebody protect my beautiful head," the hippoman
Floyd | cries as another rock hits him. The woman holds the placard over her,
Floyd | and some rocks bounce off it. The gremlin dodges a rock by quickly
Floyd | crawling horizontally along the wall.
Floyd |
Floyd | The hippoman sighs. "If only there existed some sort of device that
Floyd | could prevent rocks from falling on my head all the time," he says.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "give helmet to hippoman"
Floyd | >The hippoman takes the helmet and manages to squeeze it down on his
Floyd | big head. "Don't think this means I have forgiven you," he says.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by three points.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get grail"
Floyd | >As you are about to take it, the hippoman approaches you angrily. He
Floyd | lifts his hand as if to hit you, but suddenly stops and yelps. He looks
Floyd | startled for a moment. Then he tries to tear off the helmet, but it is
Floyd | stuck. You pick up the grail. Suddenly you feel a terrible pain in your
Floyd | hand, and you drop the grail. You hear somebody hissing, and look
Floyd | around. It is the gremlin. He is stabbing his cigarette into his own
Floyd | hand. He is clearly in pain. He removes the cigarette from his hand,
Floyd | and the pain in your hand disappears. He puts the cigarette back in his
Floyd | mouth and laughs at you.
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
inky says (to Floyd), "remove ring"
Floyd | >The ring is stuck on your finger.
Floyd |
inky says, "grr"
dsimon asks, "Wait, wasn't the ring supposed to transfer magical attacks? Is it a magical cigarette burn?"
DavidW says, "It seems to transfer both ways."
djfletch says, "so we could stick our hand in the oven maybe"
djfletch says, "or, the runes on the altar had rays of some sort coming out of it"
DavidW says, "heat or light, it said."
DavidW says, "That was just what you thought the ray-runes meant, though. There wasn't any actual heat or light there."
dsimon asks, "Hm, what if we go and touch the ring to the glowing diamond?"
djfletch says, "worth a try"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "touch ring to diamond"
Floyd | >I only understood you as far as wanting to touch the type F ring.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "touch diamond"
Floyd | >You feel nothing unexpected.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "touch ring"
Floyd | >You feel nothing unexpected.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "put ring on diamond"
Floyd | >Putting things on the diamond would achieve nothing.
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Yeah I guess that's not happening"
inky says, "the ring itself doesn't transmit, as far as I know"
inky says, "I mean, it transmits stuff done to you, not to the ring"
dsimon asks, "Hm, yeah... so then, is the gremlin glowing right now?"
dsimon asks, "With the light that's hitting us?"
djfletch says, "let me try the oven"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w" dsimon says, "k"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Prodigious and very hot cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the east.
Floyd | It is terribly hot here. The intolerable temperature is almost
Floyd | certainly caused by the red-hot stone oven standing in a corner.
Floyd | A stone table stands in the middle of the cave. Round it stands a stone
Floyd | throne with an old troll, a stone chair with a tall troll, a stone
Floyd | stool with a short troll, and a large stone. The trolls look a bit like
Floyd | humans made of stone, though with no necks, bigger jaws, smaller eyes
Floyd | and huge arms and hands. They are playing some kind of card game.
Floyd | A golem, a man crudely made from stone, is standing here unmoving. Some
Floyd | runes have been chiseled into his chest.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a stone saxophone here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "It's a pain thing the ring transmits."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "cf7"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "touch oven"
Floyd | >Never mind the stone oven.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "oh well"
DavidW says, "I don't think the rings transmit anything but pain."
djfletch says, "one exit left to try"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "mmhm"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Bumper cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the west. There is
Floyd | another exit to the northeast. Someone has chiseled gaps into the cave
Floyd | wall, forming a primitive ladder leading up to a hole in the ceiling.
Floyd | A table made from human skulls stands near the northeast exit. On the
Floyd | table stands a shimmering pink translucent cube and a small, rusty,
Floyd | holy grail.
Floyd | A small round stage stands close to the table. It is apparently made
Floyd | from human faces frozen in terrible screams.
Floyd | A small flamingo-headed man sits behind the table in a
Floyd | comfortable-looking armchair covered in obviously fake giraffe fur. He
Floyd | is wearing a jester's suit, including a ridiculous hat with bells on.
Floyd | He is staring at the pink cube.
Floyd | An armadillo-headed woman in a white toga sits next to him on a
Floyd | barstool made from green shimmering flames. She is reading a thick
Floyd | brown book called "Practical Tests of Existentialism".
Floyd | A cat-headed man sits next to her on a throne draped in black leather,
Floyd | with numerous spikes sticking out of it. He is tall, fat and dressed in
Floyd | a black leather jacket, black jeans and black leather boots.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "man, this game gets more and more confusing"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "talk to flamingo man"
Floyd | >"What is the weird stage for?" you ask.
Floyd | "It's mine. It's my altar. Where my followers stand when they worship
Floyd | me."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "talk to cat man"
Floyd | >"Who are you people?" you ask.
Floyd | The man answers in a deep voice, "The idiot in the jester suit is
Floyd | Pjyldoflopp, god of comedy. The chick with the book is Morgeldindo,
Floyd | goddess of wisdom. Me, I'm Snurgelfjekk, god of bullies. And you better
Floyd | worship me, or else!"
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "g"
Floyd | >"Who are you people?" you ask.
Floyd | The man answers in a deep voice, "The idiot in the jester suit is
Floyd | Pjyldoflopp, god of comedy. The chick with the book is Morgeldindo,
Floyd | goddess of wisdom. Me, I'm Snurgelfjekk, god of bullies. And you better
Floyd | worship me, or else!"
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "talk to woman"
Floyd | >(the armadillo-headed woman)
Floyd | "Is it a good book?" you ask.
Floyd | The woman says, sounding bored: "A total waste of paper. I hope for the
Floyd | writer's sake that he's got brain rot, there's no other excuse for
Floyd | producing such drivel."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take cube"
Floyd | >Your hand goes right through the cube as if the cube is made of air.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a flickering image inside the cube. The flamingo-headed man
Floyd | giggles and says, "Some guy in Switzerland just fell into a barrel of
Floyd | fish."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take grail"
Floyd | >You try to take the grail, but the flamingo-headed man notices it. He
Floyd | sticks his hands inside his chest and pulls out a huge fish, holding it
Floyd | around its tail. The fish is much larger than the man's chest, and
Floyd | almost larger than the man. The man slaps you in the face with the
Floyd | fish. Then, giggling, he puts it back in his chest. "It's my grail," he
Floyd | says.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "read book"
Floyd | >You try to read over the shoulder of the woman. There is a very
Floyd | complex sentence apparently describing a test you take to see if you
Floyd | are real or not. You don't understand it, but feel mildly disturbed.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a flickering image inside the cube. The flamingo-headed man
Floyd | giggles and says, "Some woman in Singapore just sat on a cactus."
Floyd |
inky asks, "what is the goal of this game, anyway?"
Johnny says (to inky), "Good question."
DavidW says, "To take a huge treasure from the cave."
DavidW says, "(This was said at the beginning.)"
djfletch says, "we have seen a couple of grails, and a big diamond that we can't carry"
DavidW says, "The grails are small treasures. A big diamond that we can't carry counts as huge."
djfletch says, "sounds reasonable"
inky asks, "did it say the goal is to take it out ourselves?"
DavidW says, "I don't remember the exact wording; I think we just need to get it out of here."
dsimon says (to Floyd), "score"
Floyd | >You have so far scored 21 out of a possible 100, in 225 turns.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "ne"
Floyd | >As you are about to go, the cat-headed man sticks out a leg and trips
Floyd | you. You fall on your face. The cat-headed man laughs.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "If we, for example, made the goblin huge enough to carry it, or tamed a monster to carry it for it, that would be okay."
DavidW says, "er carry it for us."
dsimon says (to Floyd), "u"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Titanic cave
Floyd | This cave has a hole in the floor. On the south wall is a small round
Floyd | metal hatch. It is closed.
Floyd | In the middle of the room stands a stone pedestal, on which is attached
Floyd | A HUGE IMPORTANT WARNING SIGN! On top of the pedestal stands a metal
Floyd | chest. It is closed.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes climbing up from the hole.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "read sign"
Floyd | >"Do not open the chest. If you do, an alarm will sound, and a guard
Floyd | will shoot you from the hatch with a crossbow."
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Well."
dsimon says (to Floyd), "open chest"
Floyd | >You open the chest. There comes a terrible ringing sound. An alarm!
Floyd | There are five gold coins in the chest. You quickly grab them before
Floyd | running towards the ladder. You hear something behind you. With one
Floyd | foot on the ladder you turn your head. It's the hatch; it has opened,
Floyd | revealing a female goblin peeking through. She is holding the Royal
Floyd | crossbow. "If you were going to hide my stuff, you should at least have
Floyd | had the brains to close the garbage can," she says, before shooting you
Floyd | through the eye. You fall down the hole. You are dead before you hit
Floyd | the ground.
Floyd |
Floyd |     *** You have died. ***
Floyd |
Floyd |
Floyd | In that game you scored 21 out of a possible 100, in 229 turns. You get
Floyd | reincarnated as a shrimp.
Floyd | Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, UNDO your last move or
Floyd | QUIT?
dsimon says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | > Titanic cave
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Ah ha! We must close the garbage can"
dsimon says, "Well, maybe"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "d"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Bumper cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the west. There is
Floyd | another exit to the northeast. Someone has chiseled gaps into the cave
Floyd | wall, forming a primitive ladder leading up to a hole in the ceiling.
Floyd | A table made from human skulls stands near the northeast exit. On the
Floyd | table stands a shimmering pink translucent cube and a small, rusty,
Floyd | holy grail.
Floyd | A small round stage stands close to the table. It is apparently made
Floyd | from human faces frozen in terrible screams.
Floyd | A small flamingo-headed man sits behind the table in a
Floyd | comfortable-looking armchair covered in obviously fake giraffe fur. He
Floyd | is wearing a jester's suit, including a ridiculous hat with bells on.
Floyd | He is staring at the pink cube.
Floyd | An armadillo-headed woman in a white toga sits next to him on a
Floyd | barstool made from green shimmering flames. She is reading a thick
Floyd | brown book called "Practical Tests of Existentialism".
Floyd | A cat-headed man sits next to her on a throne draped in black leather,
Floyd | with numerous spikes sticking out of it. He is tall, fat and dressed in
Floyd | a black leather jacket, black jeans and black leather boots.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes climbing down the ladder.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a flickering image inside the cube. The flamingo-headed man
Floyd | giggles and says, "Some guy in Syria just got attacked by a
Floyd | woodpecker."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Tremendous Cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the
Floyd | south.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | A genie floats about a meter above the ground. He looks like a man made
Floyd | of ice. He is bald, but has a beard of icicles. He has no legs; his
Floyd | stomach rises from a small cloud of icy steam. He holds an ice sabre.
Floyd | A hippoman, half man, half hippo, stands knitting something yellow. He
Floyd | is fat, purple and has two very thick legs. He is wearing your helmet.
Floyd | A young angry-looking woman stands holding a large placard saying "Save
Floyd | the monsters!" She is clearly one of those monster rights activists
Floyd | that have been making your job so much harder lately.
Floyd | The gremlin has climbed quite high up on the wall. He is a small green
Floyd | humanoid creature with pointy ears. He is wearing a tiny ring and is
Floyd | smoking a tiny cigarette.
Floyd | A large metal chest stands up against a wall. It is closed.
Floyd | A large machine is at the back of the cave. Its mechanisms looks very
Floyd | complex. Actually it is very easy to use. You know this because on a
Floyd | previous product-testing mission you came across a machine just like it
Floyd | and spend four hours trying to figure out how it worked. The machine is
Floyd | for sharpening tools and weapons. Just put what you want sharpened into
Floyd | it and wait.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a big tacky holy grail here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Hm, this is not the right way"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
DavidW asks, "Where are you trying to go?"
dsimon says, "Back to the room with the royal bow and the garbage can"
djfletch says, "it's right outside and in the ne cave"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the north. There is
Floyd | also an exit to the south.
Floyd | A red automat, hundred of meters tall, stands in the middle of the
Floyd | cave. Despite the insane magnitude of the machine, its money-slot and
Floyd | buttons are normal-sized and placed at normal height. The
Floyd | merchandise-slot is also close to the floor, but huge enough to hold a
Floyd | horse. You have come across these automats before. Several companies
Floyd | have recently begun placing them in dangerous places, for adventurers
Floyd | who need equipment. They are easy to use; just buy something. Something
Floyd | is written on the automat next to the buttons.
Floyd | A stone altar stands up against a wall. It is low, shadowy,
Floyd | bloodstained and has runes written on it. Next to it is a huge pile of
Floyd | fish bones.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the altar you can see:
Floyd | A sluggish fish. Its eyes are white and have no pupils. It is crawling
Floyd | around.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "yeah, head south to outside, ne, teleport, e"
inky has disconnected.
inky has connected.
dsimon says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the south, or you can go
Floyd | further into the mountain to the north.
Floyd | A burly barbarian is leaning against a wall, his arms crossed over his
Floyd | naked chest, a grim expression on his face. A long sabre is in his
Floyd | belt.
Floyd | A tough-looking dwarf, wearing chain mail and a helmet, is sitting on
Floyd | the floor. He is holding an axe almost as big as himself. He is smoking
Floyd | a pipe.
Floyd | A muscular white horse and a mangy donkey stand here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "ne"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Vast cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the southwest. In the middle
Floyd | of the ceiling, high above you, is a round hole. On the floor, directly
Floyd | under the hole, is a pile of hay.
Floyd | A short lever with a handle sticks out from a wall. The handle has a
Floyd | thin, wide gap, large enough for the fingers of one hand to go through.
Floyd | A metallic pyramid, about half a meter high, sticks up from the cave
Floyd | floor. You once tested a hundred different teleporters, and you
Floyd | recognize the pyramid as one of the safest and least complicated
Floyd | models. To use it you just stand on it and shake the lever repeatedly.
Floyd | This particular teleporter seems badly designed though: the lever is
Floyd | far away from it, almost on the other side of the cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can hear a low humming coming from the teleporter.
Floyd |
Floyd | Up from the lever sticks the new magical sword from Adventurer's
Floyd | Emporium. According to the commercial it will start to vibrate when you
Floyd | are close to danger. It is shaking like crazy, but not enough to shake
Floyd | the lever.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a cage here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword goes even crazier and starts thrashing like a headless
Floyd | chicken on drugs.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The sound from the teleporter gets
Floyd | louder.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "stand on teleporter"
Floyd | >You get on the teleporter.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The sound gets even louder. A few
Floyd | electrical sparks shoots up from the teleporter. Your feet tickle.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "goblin, stand on teleporter"
Floyd | >The goblin gets on the teleporter.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The teleporter starts shaking and
Floyd | smoking. The cave begins to fade out around you, and another cave fades
Floyd | in.
Floyd |
Floyd | Voluminous cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit to the east. In the middle of the floor is a
Floyd | round hole.
Floyd | A huge dead monster lies here, its four feet in the air. It has a
Floyd | stupid-looking face on a round gray hairless body. Its tiny eyes stare
Floyd | at nothing. The upper half of a dead pointy-eared elf is sticking out
Floyd | of its mouth. It looks like the monster choked on the elf. The elf is
Floyd | wearing a backpack.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin begins to fade in next to you. You look down at yourself.
Floyd | You seem unsubstantial, like a ghost. Slowly you begin to take on a
Floyd | more solid form. Now you look normal.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Capacious cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the west and northwest.
Floyd | A goblin woman is standing here. She is wearing a medallion, and
Floyd | carrying a purse. You are not quite sure, but with her long ears, sharp
Floyd | yellow teeth, and big feet you think she is pretty cute by goblin
Floyd | standards.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | "Well, hello there!" says the female goblin and smiles.
Floyd |
Floyd | "Uh, hi," says the goblin, his cheeks turning a darker shade of green.
Floyd | They seem distracted.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "nw"
Floyd | >You sneak out. The goblins don't seem to notice.
Floyd |
Floyd | Extensive cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit to the southeast.
Floyd | On the north wall is a small round metal hatch. It is closed.
Floyd | Near the hatch is a table.
Floyd | In a corner stands a short metal garbage can. It is open.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the table you can see:
Floyd | A long heavy-looking iron spear.
Floyd |
Floyd | The garbage can contains:
Floyd | A Remmingeim Royal crossbow. The older Royal model is almost identical
Floyd | to the Supreme. Very few but an experienced product tester like
Floyd | yourself could tell the difference. The Royal is quite good. It does
Floyd | not have the returning arrow function, but it is magically protected
Floyd | from theft and vandalism. It has an arrow identical to the one in the
Floyd | Supreme bow.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "close garbage can"
Floyd | >You close the garbage can.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "l"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Extensive cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit to the southeast.
Floyd | On the north wall is a small round metal hatch. It is closed.
Floyd | Near the hatch is a table.
Floyd | In a corner stands a short metal garbage can. It is closed.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the table you can see:
Floyd | A long heavy-looking iron spear.
Floyd |
Jacqueline waves and makes an isquiesque departure for home. DavidW says, "So now she'll through the spear at you."
DavidW says, "er throw"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take spear"
Floyd | >The spear is too heavy for that.
Floyd |
djfletch asks, "should we leave the other crossbow for confusion?"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "open can"
Floyd | >You open the garbage can. It contains:
Floyd | A Remmingeim Royal crossbow. The older Royal model is almost identical
Floyd | to the Supreme. Very few but an experienced product tester like
Floyd | yourself could tell the difference. The Royal is quite good. It does
Floyd | not have the returning arrow function, but it is magically protected
Floyd | from theft and vandalism. It has an arrow identical to the one in the
Floyd | Supreme bow.
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Good idea"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "close can"
Floyd | >You close the garbage can.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "Since they're almost identical. Very good idea."
dsimon says (to Floyd), "put crossbow on table"
Floyd | >You put the Supreme crossbow on the table.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "oh right so we hide her one but we leave our one"
inky says, "cunning"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "se"
Floyd | >You sneak back.
Floyd |
Floyd | Capacious cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the west and northwest.
Floyd | A goblin woman is standing here. She is wearing a medallion, and
Floyd | carrying a purse. You are not quite sure, but with her long ears, sharp
Floyd | yellow teeth, and big feet you think she is pretty cute by goblin
Floyd | standards. She is staring at your sidekick, looking rather distracted.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see the goblin sidekick here.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >"Come along now," you say to the goblin as you leave.
Floyd |
Floyd | Voluminous cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit to the east. In the middle of the floor is a
Floyd | round hole.
Floyd | A huge dead monster lies here, its four feet in the air. It has a
Floyd | stupid-looking face on a round gray hairless body. Its tiny eyes stare
Floyd | at nothing. The upper half of a dead pointy-eared elf is sticking out
Floyd | of its mouth. It looks like the monster choked on the elf. The elf is
Floyd | wearing a backpack.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin reluctantly walks in from the east, throwing several glances
Floyd | over his shoulder.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "d"
Floyd | >You jump down the hole. You land in a pile of hay. You hear someone
Floyd | shouting, "Wheeeeeee!" and you look up. The goblin is falling right
Floyd | towards you. You quickly roll to the side, and the goblin lands in the
Floyd | hay. You two get up.
Floyd |
Floyd | Vast cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the southwest. In the middle
Floyd | of the ceiling, high above you, is a round hole. On the floor, directly
Floyd | under the hole, is a pile of hay.
Floyd | A short lever with a handle sticks out from a wall. The handle has a
Floyd | thin, wide gap, large enough for the fingers of one hand to go through.
Floyd | A metallic pyramid, about half a meter high, sticks up from the cave
Floyd | floor. You once tested a hundred different teleporters, and you
Floyd | recognize the pyramid as one of the safest and least complicated
Floyd | models. To use it you just stand on it and shake the lever repeatedly.
Floyd | This particular teleporter seems badly designed though: the lever is
Floyd | far away from it, almost on the other side of the cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | Up from the lever sticks the new magical sword from Adventurer's
Floyd | Emporium. According to the commercial it will start to vibrate when you
Floyd | are close to danger. It is shaking like crazy, but not enough to shake
Floyd | the lever.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see the goblin sidekick and a cage here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword goes even crazier and starts thrashing like a headless
Floyd | chicken on drugs.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. There comes a low humming sound from
Floyd | the teleporter.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "sw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the south, or you can go
Floyd | further into the mountain to the north.
Floyd | A burly barbarian is leaning against a wall, his arms crossed over his
Floyd | naked chest, a grim expression on his face. A long sabre is in his
Floyd | belt.
Floyd | A tough-looking dwarf, wearing chain mail and a helmet, is sitting on
Floyd | the floor. He is holding an axe almost as big as himself. He is smoking
Floyd | a pipe.
Floyd | A muscular white horse and a mangy donkey stand here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the north. There is
Floyd | also an exit to the south.
Floyd | A red automat, hundred of meters tall, stands in the middle of the
Floyd | cave. Despite the insane magnitude of the machine, its money-slot and
Floyd | buttons are normal-sized and placed at normal height. The
Floyd | merchandise-slot is also close to the floor, but huge enough to hold a
Floyd | horse. You have come across these automats before. Several companies
Floyd | have recently begun placing them in dangerous places, for adventurers
Floyd | who need equipment. They are easy to use; just buy something. Something
Floyd | is written on the automat next to the buttons.
Floyd | A stone altar stands up against a wall. It is low, shadowy,
Floyd | bloodstained and has runes written on it. Next to it is a huge pile of
Floyd | fish bones.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the altar you can see:
Floyd | A sluggish fish. Its eyes are white and have no pupils. It is crawling
Floyd | around.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Bumper cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the west. There is
Floyd | another exit to the northeast. Someone has chiseled gaps into the cave
Floyd | wall, forming a primitive ladder leading up to a hole in the ceiling.
Floyd | A table made from human skulls stands near the northeast exit. On the
Floyd | table stands a shimmering pink translucent cube and a small, rusty,
Floyd | holy grail.
Floyd | A small round stage stands close to the table. It is apparently made
Floyd | from human faces frozen in terrible screams.
Floyd | A small flamingo-headed man sits behind the table in a
Floyd | comfortable-looking armchair covered in obviously fake giraffe fur. He
Floyd | is wearing a jester's suit, including a ridiculous hat with bells on.
Floyd | He is staring at the pink cube.
Floyd | An armadillo-headed woman in a white toga sits next to him on a
Floyd | barstool made from green shimmering flames. She is reading a thick
Floyd | brown book called "Practical Tests of Existentialism".
Floyd | A cat-headed man sits next to her on a throne draped in black leather,
Floyd | with numerous spikes sticking out of it. He is tall, fat and dressed in
Floyd | a black leather jacket, black jeans and black leather boots.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a flickering image inside the cube. The flamingo-headed man
Floyd | giggles and says, "Some guy in Russia just stepped on a beehive."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "u"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Titanic cave
Floyd | This cave has a hole in the floor. On the south wall is a small round
Floyd | metal hatch. It is closed.
Floyd | In the middle of the room stands a stone pedestal, on which is attached
Floyd | A HUGE IMPORTANT WARNING SIGN! On top of the pedestal stands a metal
Floyd | chest. It is closed.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes climbing up from the hole.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "open chest"
Floyd | >You open the chest. There comes a terrible ringing sound. An alarm!
Floyd | There are five gold coins in the chest. You quickly grab them before
Floyd | running towards the ladder. You hear something behind you. With one
Floyd | foot on the ladder you turn your head. It's the hatch; it has opened,
Floyd | revealing a female goblin peeking through. She is holding your Supreme
Floyd | crossbow. It is aimed right at you. She fires. Almost instantly, before
Floyd | it has even left the crossbow completely, the arrow returns to the bow.
Floyd | "What?" says the goblin lady. She fires again. The arrow returns again.
Floyd | Startled the lady fires again and again. She begins to swear. You laugh
Floyd | and climb down.
Floyd |
Floyd | Bumper cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the west. There is
Floyd | another exit to the northeast. Someone has chiseled gaps into the cave
Floyd | wall, forming a primitive ladder leading up to a hole in the ceiling.
Floyd | A table made from human skulls stands near the northeast exit. On the
Floyd | table stands a shimmering pink translucent cube and a small, rusty,
Floyd | holy grail.
Floyd | A small round stage stands close to the table. It is apparently made
Floyd | from human faces frozen in terrible screams.
Floyd | A small flamingo-headed man sits behind the table in a
Floyd | comfortable-looking armchair covered in obviously fake giraffe fur. He
Floyd | is wearing a jester's suit, including a ridiculous hat with bells on.
Floyd | He is staring at the pink cube.
Floyd | An armadillo-headed woman in a white toga sits next to him on a
Floyd | barstool made from green shimmering flames. She is reading a slim gray
Floyd | book called "Schrodinger's Goldfish: Confirmation of Negative Time".
Floyd | A cat-headed man sits next to her on a throne draped in black leather,
Floyd | with numerous spikes sticking out of it. He is tall, fat and dressed in
Floyd | a black leather jacket, black jeans and black leather boots.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes climbing down the ladder.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a flickering image inside the cube. The flamingo-headed man
Floyd | giggles and says, "Some guy in Scotland just slid on a banana peel."
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by three points.]
Floyd |
DavidW says, "hooray"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "cf8"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
inky says, "huzzah"
inky says, "now I guess we can play troll poker"
DavidW says, "yes indeed"
djfletch says, "or buy something from the machine"
Ellison arrives, ready to play with the toys. djfletch says, "probably we need something expensive so we have to win money from trolls first"
DavidW says, "The cheapest item in the machine is a wheelbarrow at 30 gp, iirc."
inky says, "oh yeah, I forgot about that machine"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Prodigious and very hot cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the east.
Floyd | It is terribly hot here. The intolerable temperature is almost
Floyd | certainly caused by the red-hot stone oven standing in a corner.
Floyd | A stone table stands in the middle of the cave. Round it stands a stone
Floyd | throne with an old troll, a stone chair with a tall troll, a stone
Floyd | stool with a short troll, and a large stone. The trolls look a bit like
Floyd | humans made of stone, though with no necks, bigger jaws, smaller eyes
Floyd | and huge arms and hands. They are playing some kind of card game.
Floyd | A golem, a man crudely made from stone, is standing here unmoving. Some
Floyd | runes have been chiseled into his chest.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a stone saxophone here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "telk to troll"
Floyd | >That's not a verb I recognise.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "oops talk"
Floyd | >Sorry, that can't be corrected.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to troll"
Floyd | >Who do you mean, the old troll, the tall troll or the short troll?
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "old"
Floyd | >"Can I play?" you ask.
Floyd | "Ur, have you got any money?"
Floyd | "Yes."
Floyd | "Ur, sure, sit down on the rock, and we'll play."
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "sit on rock"
Floyd | >Just as you are about to sit down the old troll says, "Ur, have you
Floyd | got any money?"
Floyd | "Yes."
Floyd | "Ur, good, then you can play."
Floyd | You sit down.
Floyd | "Ur, you want to know the rules of troll poker?" asks the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, everybody gets one card," says the short troll.
Floyd | "Ur, there are thirteen cards in the deck," says the tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, the ace of rocks is the highest," says the short troll.
Floyd | "Ur, that is weird. The ace only have one rock," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, maybe it's a trick to fool stupid players," says the tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, yeah. The stupid players think they can't win when they get the
Floyd | ace," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, everybody looks at their card," says the short troll.
Floyd | "Ur, if anybody asks you what card you have, it's a trick," says the
Floyd | tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, so don't tell them," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, then we bet," says the tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, if I have bet three, you can't bet two," says the short troll.
Floyd | "Ur, you can't bet one either," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, we mean you can't bet less than the other one," says the short
Floyd | troll.
Floyd | "Ur, the one that betted the highest," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, you can't bet too high either," says the short troll.
Floyd | "Ur, like if I have only three coins left, then you can't bet higher
Floyd | than three," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, that's altogether," says the short troll.
Floyd | "Ur, yeah, you can't bet more than three altogether," says the tall
Floyd | troll.
Floyd | "Ur, when it's your turn you can stay or raise or fold," says the old
Floyd | troll.
Floyd | "Ur, if you stay, it means you bet the same as the other one," says the
Floyd | tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, the one that betted the highest," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, if you raise it means you bet more than the other one," says the
Floyd | short troll.
Floyd | "Ur, the one that betted the highest," says the tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, like if you raise two..." says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, then you bet two more than the other one," says the tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, the one that betted the highest," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, if you fold you don't bet anything," says the tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, but you don't get to win anything either," says the short troll.
Floyd | "Ur, when everybody has betted the same..." says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, or folded," says the tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, yeah, or folded," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, then the round is over," says the short troll.
Floyd | "Ur, then we show our cards," says the tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, the one with the highest card wins," says the the tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, he gets all the money the others have betted," says the short
Floyd | troll.
Floyd | "Ur, if you don't get the rules, just talk to me and we will explain
Floyd | them again," says the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll picks up the deck of cards and shuffles it. He deals four
Floyd | cards face down on the table. He grabs one card for himself and the two
Floyd | other troll each grab a card. The last card is in front of you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "cf9"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the five of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 5," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, I stay," says the tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, I stay," says the short troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 5.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 5. (You, the old troll, the
Floyd | tall troll and the short troll only have 5 gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 5 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 5 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 5 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 5 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 15 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
DavidW says, "dum dee dum"
inky says, "man"
djfletch says, "I suppose we should fold - we can't bluff because we can't raise any higher"
DavidW says, "I love this puzzle."
dsimon says, "Wait, this seems too easy"
DavidW says, "It's so damn sneaky."
dsimon says, "We can just fold over and over until we get the ace"
dsimon says, "And never lose any money"
DavidW says (to dsimon), "well, sure. Try it. :)"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd |
Floyd | The round is over. Now to see who won.
Floyd | The old troll shows his card. It is the king of rocks.
Floyd | The tall troll shows his card. It is the ace of rocks.
Floyd | The short troll shows his card. It is the jack of rocks.
Floyd | The tall troll wins the round.
Floyd | The old troll gives 5 gold coins to the tall troll.
Floyd | The short troll gives 5 gold coins to the tall troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | The short troll asks the tall troll "Ur, can I borrow three coins?"
Floyd | The tall troll says, "Ur, alright," and gives three coins to the short
Floyd | troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says to the tall troll "Ur, time to pay your taxes."
Floyd | The tall troll says, "Ur, alright," and gives three coins to the old
Floyd | troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals four cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself and the two other troll each grab a card.
Floyd | The last card is in front of you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the three of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 1," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, I raise to 2," says the tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, I raise to 3," says the short troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 3.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 3. (The old troll and the
Floyd | short troll only have 3 gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 3 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 9 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 3 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 5 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 6 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd | "Ur, I fold," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, I stay," says the tall troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | The round is over. Now to see who won.
Floyd | The tall troll shows his card. It is the ten of rocks.
Floyd | The short troll shows his card. It is the ace of rocks.
Floyd | The short troll wins the round.
Floyd | The old troll gives 1 gold coin to the short troll.
Floyd | The tall troll gives 3 gold coins to the short troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals four cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself and the two other troll each grab a card.
Floyd | The last card is in front of you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the ten of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, gee, I wonder if I should fold. Yeah, I think I'll do that," says
Floyd | the old troll and laughs.
Floyd | "Ur, what to do? What to do? Oh, I know, I should fold," says the tall
Floyd | troll and laughs.
Floyd | "Ur, I fold. I'm just a big sissy I guess," says the short troll and
Floyd | laughs.
Floyd | You win the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals four cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself and the two other troll each grab a card.
Floyd | The last card is in front of you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
inky says, "hmm"
dsimon says, "Crap, they know what card we have"
DavidW asks (of dsimon), "gee, y'think?"
dsimon says, "Heh"
inky says, "ok, wait"
inky asks, "even if we win all the money that's only 20 gold, isn't it?"
DavidW says (to inky), "yes"
dsimon says, "That's true too, though 20 is still closer to buying something than 5"
djfletch says, "can we hide a card somehow and switch it back in later"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "hide card"
Floyd | >That's not a verb I recognise.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "palm card"
Floyd | >That's not a verb I recognise.
Floyd |
dsimon says, "That's true, though 20 is still closer to buying something than 5 maybe there are more coins around elsewhere"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >5 gold coins
Floyd | A staff (with tentacles)
Floyd | A bottle (closed)
Floyd | A healing gun
Floyd | A nosehairscrew
Floyd | A manual
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | Mirrorshades
Floyd | A ring
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "The barbarian and dwarf said they would buy treasures."
inky says, "oh wait!"
inky says (to Floyd), "remove mirrorshades"
Floyd | >You take off the pair of mirrorshades.
Floyd |
inky says, "classic poker mistake"
DavidW says, "ha ha ha"
djfletch exclaims, "doh!"
DavidW says, "It took me ages to learn to take the shades off!"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "give shades to tall troll"
Floyd | >"Ur, no thanks."
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the queen of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 2," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, for some strange reason I'm suddenly not feeling very lucky. I
Floyd | fold," says the tall troll and laughs.
Floyd | "Ur, I stay," says the short troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 2.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 2. (The old troll only has 2
Floyd | gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 2 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 6 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 7 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 5 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 4 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
DavidW says, "Other possible hiding spots for coins: the genie's chest, the safe where the fish are, and whatever's northeast of the gods."
inky says, "hmm"
Ellison goes back to Squeamhurst.. inky says, "I guess the tall troll can still see our hand somehow"
inky says, "perhaps because he is so tall"
DavidW says, "if he knew, he'd bet 5 or fold."
inky says, "he did fold!"
DavidW says, "well, he might also fold if he has a crummy card."
inky says, "though maybe he just got a 2 or something"
inky says, "yeah"
DavidW says, "stay or raise, I suppose. Or fold until you get an ace."
dsimon says (to Floyd), "bet 5"
Floyd | >Actually, you can't raise. Somebody has already betted 2, the highest
Floyd | possible bet. You can only stay or fold.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "stay"
Floyd | >You stay.
Floyd |
Floyd | The round is over. Now to see who won.
Floyd | The old troll shows his card. It is the jack of rocks.
Floyd | The short troll shows his card. It is the nine of rocks.
Floyd | You show your card.
Floyd | You win the round.
Floyd | The old troll gives 2 gold coins to you.
Floyd | The short troll gives 2 gold coins to you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says to the tall troll "Ur, time to pay your taxes."
Floyd | The tall troll says, "Ur, alright," and gives a coin to the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals four cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself and the two other troll each grab a card.
Floyd | The last card is in front of you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
djfletch says, "cool"
dsimon says, "That taxes business is suspicious"
dsimon says, "Ah well"
inky says, "I think it's the author's way of sorting out the coins to keep them all playing"
DavidW says, "It's to keep everyone in the game as long as possible, I think."
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the eight of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 1," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, I stay," says the tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, I fold," says the short troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 1.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 1. (The old troll only has 1
Floyd | gold coin.)
Floyd | The old troll has 1 gold coin.
Floyd | The tall troll has 5 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 5 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 9 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 2 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd |
Floyd | The round is over. Now to see who won.
Floyd | The old troll shows his card. It is the king of rocks.
Floyd | The tall troll shows his card. It is the six of rocks.
Floyd | The old troll wins the round.
Floyd | The tall troll gives 1 gold coin to the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals four cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself and the two other troll each grab a card.
Floyd | The last card is in front of you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the seven of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I fold," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 1," says the tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, I raise to 4," says the short troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 4.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 4. (The tall troll only has
Floyd | 4 gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 2 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 4 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 5 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 9 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 5 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd | "Ur, I fold," says the tall troll.
Floyd | The short troll wins the round.
Floyd | The tall troll gives 1 gold coin to the short troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals four cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself and the two other troll each grab a card.
Floyd | The last card is in front of you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the eight of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 2," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, I stay," says the tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, I stay," says the short troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 2.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 2. (The old troll only has 2
Floyd | gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 2 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 3 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 6 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 9 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 6 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd |
Floyd | The round is over. Now to see who won.
Floyd | The old troll shows his card. It is the ace of rocks.
Floyd | The tall troll shows his card. It is the ten of rocks.
Floyd | The short troll shows his card. It is the king of rocks.
Floyd | The old troll wins the round.
Floyd | The tall troll gives 2 gold coins to the old troll.
Floyd | The short troll gives 2 gold coins to the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals four cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself and the two other troll each grab a card.
Floyd | The last card is in front of you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Oi, this is not fun, and the rest of the game has been fun"
dsimon says, "Therefore, this is probably not the correct solution"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the ace of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 1," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, I stay," says the tall troll.
Floyd | "Ur, I stay," says the short troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 1.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 1. (The tall troll only has
Floyd | 1 gold coin.)
Floyd | The old troll has 6 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 1 gold coin.
Floyd | The short troll has 4 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 9 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 3 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
DavidW says, "no, this is right. It doesn't take that long."
dsimon says (to Floyd), "raise"
Floyd | >You have to say how much you would like to raise. For instance "raise
Floyd | 1"
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Oh, can't go any higher than 1"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "stay"
Floyd | >You stay.
Floyd |
Floyd | The round is over. Now to see who won.
Floyd | The old troll shows his card. It is the nine of rocks.
Floyd | The tall troll shows his card. It is the ten of rocks.
Floyd | The short troll shows his card. It is the jack of rocks.
Floyd | You show your card.
Floyd | You win the round.
Floyd | The old troll gives 1 gold coin to you.
Floyd | The tall troll gives 1 gold coin to you.
Floyd | The short troll gives 1 gold coin to you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals three cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself and the short troll grabs another. The tall
Floyd | troll is not in the game, as he doesn't have any money. The last card
Floyd | is in front of you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the eight of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 1," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, I fold," says the short troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 1.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 5. (The old troll only has 5
inky says, "hunh"
Floyd | gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 5 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 3 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 12 gold coins.
Floyd | There is 1 gold coin in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
inky asks, "the tall troll can't get money from the others?"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd | The old troll wins the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals three cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself and the short troll grabs another. The tall
Floyd | troll is not in the game, as he doesn't have any money. The last card
Floyd | is in front of you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the ace of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 1," says the old troll.
Floyd | "Ur, I raise to 3," says the short troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 3.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 3. (The short troll only has
Floyd | 3 gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 5 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 3 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 12 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 4 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "stay"
Floyd | >You stay.
Floyd | "Ur, I fold," says the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | The round is over. Now to see who won.
Floyd | The short troll shows his card. It is the jack of rocks.
Floyd | You show your card.
Floyd | You win the round.
Floyd | The old troll gives 1 gold coin to you.
Floyd | The short troll gives 3 gold coins to you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Ah, and now but two remain"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the three of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 4," says the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 4.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 4. (The old troll only has 4
Floyd | gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 4 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 16 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 4 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd | The old troll wins the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the five of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I fold," says the old troll.
Floyd | You win the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the two of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I fold," says the old troll.
Floyd | You win the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the seven of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 4," says the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 4.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 4. (The old troll only has 4
Floyd | gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 4 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 16 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 4 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd | The old troll wins the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the three of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I fold," says the old troll.
Floyd | You win the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the king of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I fold," says the old troll.
Floyd | You win the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
inky says, "I guess we have to hope for us getting like a queen and he gets a ten or somerthing"
DavidW says, "hm"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the nine of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 2," says the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 2.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 4. (The old troll only has 4
Floyd | gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 4 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 16 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 2 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Hm"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd | The old troll wins the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the ten of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 4," says the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 4.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 4. (The old troll only has 4
Floyd | gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 4 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 16 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 4 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd | The old troll wins the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the ten of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 3," says the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 3.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 4. (The old troll only has 4
Floyd | gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 4 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 16 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 3 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd | The old troll wins the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the nine of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I fold," says the old troll.
Floyd | You win the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the two of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 2," says the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 2.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 4. (The old troll only has 4
Floyd | gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 4 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 16 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 2 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd | The old troll wins the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the four of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 4," says the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 4.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 4. (The old troll only has 4
Floyd | gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 4 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 16 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 4 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd | The old troll wins the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the four of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 1," says the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 1.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 4. (The old troll only has 4
Floyd | gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 4 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 16 gold coins.
Floyd | There is 1 gold coin in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd | The old troll wins the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the king of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 1," says the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 1.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 4. (The old troll only has 4
Floyd | gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 4 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 16 gold coins.
Floyd | There is 1 gold coin in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
DavidW says, "I don't remember this being this difficult."
djfletch says, "raise raise raise"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "raise"
Floyd | >You have to say how much you would like to raise. For instance "raise
Floyd | 1"
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "raise 4"
Floyd | >You can't raise that much. The highest possible bet (in total) is 4.
Floyd | That means you can only raise 3.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "raise 3"
Floyd | >You raise to 4.
Floyd | "Ur, I fold," says the old troll.
Floyd | You win the round.
Floyd | The old troll gives 1 gold coin to you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Meh, he's smart"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "cf10"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the five of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 1," says the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 1.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 3. (The old troll only has 3
Floyd | gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 3 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 17 gold coins.
Floyd | There is 1 gold coin in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd | The old troll wins the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the six of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 1," says the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 1.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 3. (The old troll only has 3
Floyd | gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 3 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 17 gold coins.
Floyd | There is 1 gold coin in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "fold"
Floyd | >You fold.
Floyd | The old troll wins the round. No money though.
Floyd |
Floyd | The cards are put back in the deck. The old troll picks up the deck of
Floyd | cards and shuffles it. He deals two cards face down on the table. He
Floyd | grabs one card for himself. The other card is in front of you. The
Floyd | short troll and the tall troll are not in the game, as they don't have
Floyd | any money.
Floyd |
Floyd | The old troll says, "Ur, if you want to play, take the card. If you
Floyd | don't want to play get off the rock."
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take card"
Floyd | >You pick up your card, it's the ace of rocks.
Floyd | "Ur, I bet 3," says the old troll.
Floyd |
Floyd | Your turn.
Floyd | The lowest possible bet (in total) is now 3.
Floyd | The highest possible bet (in total) is now 3. (The old troll only has 3
Floyd | gold coins.)
Floyd | The old troll has 3 gold coins.
Floyd | The tall troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | The short troll has 0 gold coins.
Floyd | You have 17 gold coins.
Floyd | There are 3 gold coins in the pot.
Floyd | So far you have betted 0 gold coins.
Floyd | Do you want to stay, raise or fold?
Floyd |
dsimon asks, "Hm, should I raise less to not scare him off?"
DavidW says, "stay!"
inky says, "he bet all his money, so"
DavidW says, "yeah, and we have the ace."
dsimon says (to Floyd), "stay"
Floyd | >You stay.
Floyd |
Floyd | The round is over. Now to see who won.
Floyd | The old troll shows his card. It is the jack of rocks.
Floyd | You show your card.
Floyd | You win the round.
Floyd | The old troll gives 3 gold coins to you.
Floyd |
Floyd | "Ur," says the old troll. "we're all broke. We can't play with you any
Floyd | more."
Floyd | "Ok," you say. You put the card back and get up.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by five points.]
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "cf11"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Ah, yeah"
dsimon says, "Okay, someone else drive for a bit :-)"
djfletch asks, "hmm what's left to do?"
DavidW asks, "well, there's several problems: getting the sax, opening the genie's chest, opening the safe, dealing with the gods...?"
inky says, "hmm yeah"
DavidW says, "getting the knife"
DavidW says, "dealing with the gremlin"
inky says, "I thought perhaps we could trade the fancy grail for the cheaper grail"
djfletch says, "guessing the sax comes before the gods because it is for the cat god's altar"
DavidW says, "We could always talk to the hoverist again too."
DavidW says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >20 gold coins
Floyd | A staff (with tentacles)
Floyd | A bottle (closed)
Floyd | A healing gun
Floyd | A nosehairscrew
Floyd | Mirrorshades
Floyd | A manual
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | A ring
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "open bottle"
Floyd | >You try to open the bottle, but can't. It has some kind of childproof
Floyd | lid.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "heh. Thought so."
DavidW says, "oh, we also need to improve the goblin's eyesight so he can read the runes back where the sauce was found."
djfletch says, "for the safe we could try letting the monster out of the staff in the tight room underneath it"
inky says, "man, there is too much left to do"
DavidW says, "The sax must come before the cat god, but the other two gods are probably something else."
inky says (to Floyd), "score"
Floyd | >You have so far scored 29 out of a possible 100, in 314 turns.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to dj), "Try it!"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >You try, but the bright light is too strong. It hurts your eyes.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "wear shades"
Floyd | >You put on the pair of mirrorshades.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the north. There is
Floyd | also an exit to the south.
Floyd | A red automat, hundred of meters tall, stands in the middle of the
Floyd | cave. Despite the insane magnitude of the machine, its money-slot and
Floyd | buttons are normal-sized and placed at normal height. The
Floyd | merchandise-slot is also close to the floor, but huge enough to hold a
Floyd | horse. You have come across these automats before. Several companies
Floyd | have recently begun placing them in dangerous places, for adventurers
Floyd | who need equipment. They are easy to use; just buy something. Something
Floyd | is written on the automat next to the buttons.
Floyd | A stone altar stands up against a wall. It is low, shadowy,
Floyd | bloodstained and has runes written on it. Next to it is a huge pile of
Floyd | fish bones.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the altar you can see:
Floyd | A sluggish fish. Its eyes are white and have no pupils. It is crawling
Floyd | around.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the south, or you can go
Floyd | further into the mountain to the north.
Floyd | A burly barbarian is leaning against a wall, his arms crossed over his
Floyd | naked chest, a grim expression on his face. A long sabre is in his
Floyd | belt.
Floyd | A tough-looking dwarf, wearing chain mail and a helmet, is sitting on
Floyd | the floor. He is holding an axe almost as big as himself. He is smoking
Floyd | a pipe.
Floyd | A muscular white horse and a mangy donkey stand here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >You are not testing The Pebble That Protects You From Falling Down
Floyd | From Really High Places this month. It was just a scam anyway.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "oops"
DavidW says, "heh"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "nw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Big cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit southeast to the outside, or you could go further
Floyd | into the mountain to the northwest.
Floyd | A somewhat larger than life-size statue of his holiness One-Hand Jack
Floyd | stands in the middle of the cave. Jack used to be an infamous pirate,
Floyd | but later formed Hoverism, a peaceful religion. The statue holds its
Floyd | left arm out and up, the hook at the end of it just low enough to be
Floyd | reached.
Floyd | An old Hoverist is hovering about a meter above the floor. He is
Floyd | sitting in the lotus position, his head is turned towards the statue,
Floyd | and his eyes are closed. He is wearing a white loincloth.
Floyd |
Floyd | Though you cannot see it, you know that a Hustlespleen & Poe Coat of
Floyd | Invisibility hangs on the hook. It is supposed to turn visible (or turn
Floyd | invisible again) whenever you say the magic word "tango".
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "nw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Large cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the northwest and southeast.
Floyd | A huge black safe stands here, closed. Due to the unevenness of the
Floyd | cave floor, there is a gap between the safe and the floor, big enough
Floyd | for somebody to crawl down into.
Floyd | A shoal of small fish crawls around on the floor. They look creepy.
Floyd | Their skins are white and look almost transparent. Their eyes are also
Floyd | white and don't have pupils.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "enter gap"
Floyd | >
Floyd | A tight room
Floyd | This is a tight tiny room formed between the safe and the uneven floor.
Floyd | You can barely move. Unfortunately the safe seems to be just as solid
Floyd | on the underside. The only way out is up.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin crawls in with you. Your bodies are pushed together. "This
Floyd | is uncomfortable," the goblin mutters.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "touch goblin with staff"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick with the staff)
Floyd | The goblin sidekick vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a most horrible sound like two carriages filled with drum sets
Floyd | crashing at full speed, whilst a million cows pull a million feet up
Floyd | from a swamp. There is a terrible feeling of being thrown. And there is
Floyd | pain. Lots and lots of pain. You lie still, waiting for the pain to
Floyd | subside. It doesn't.
Floyd |
Floyd | Wearily you open your eyes. Turquoise. That's all you can see. It takes
Floyd | a moment before you realize that something covers your eyes. Slowly you
Floyd | lift your arm (pain, pain, pain) and wipe your face (pain, pain, pain).
Floyd | It is turquoise sludge that covers your face. And your arm. And, you
Floyd | notice, the rest of your body. You are lying in a pool of the stuff.
Floyd | Looking around a bit you notice you have been thrown into another cave.
Floyd | You open your mouth and spit out some sludge. It is very silent. In
Floyd | fact you cannot hear a sound. Wait a moment. You twist your head to the
Floyd | side (pain, pain, pain) and sludge pours out of your ear. You can hear
Floyd | a dripping sound coming from the southeast.
Floyd |
Floyd | "Note to self," you think. "Do not transport a very large monster into
Floyd | a very small space, when simultaneously occupying that space."
Floyd |
Floyd | You start trying to get up (PAIN, PAIN, PAIN). You stop trying to get
Floyd | up. You have noticed a piece of metal sticking out of your shoulder.
Floyd | You carefully pull it out. After a moment it dawns on you; this is a
Floyd | piece of the safe. Looking closer at your body you see quite a lot of
Floyd | other pieces of the safe sticking out from it. Enough to build a new
Floyd | small safe from, you estimate. Carefully you begin to pick out the
Floyd | pieces, one by one, and throw them away.
Floyd |
Floyd | You get up. You clean off the worst of the sludge. You start longing
Floyd | for a long hot bath. And a chiropractor appointment. You look around.
Floyd |
Floyd | Enormous cave
Floyd | The only exit from this cave is to the southeast.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | Several fragments from the safe are lying here. Quite a bit of
Floyd | turquoise sludge is on the floor; most of it around the southeast exit.
Floyd |
Floyd | A pair of mirrorshades lies here. You would have been able to see
Floyd | yourself in them, except they are covered in turquoise sludge.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by five points.]
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Wow"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get shades"
Floyd | >You pick up mirrorshades and wipe the sludge off them.
Floyd |
inky says, "man dang"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "se"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Large cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the northwest and southeast.
Floyd | A shoal of small fish crawls around on the floor. They look creepy.
Floyd | Their skins are white and look almost transparent. Their eyes are also
Floyd | white and don't have pupils.
Floyd | Big and small pieces of the safe are spread all around this room. The
Floyd | safe door has embedded itself halfway into the cave wall. There are
Floyd | quite a lot of pieces of porcelain spread around too. Lots and lots of
Floyd | dead fish lie around, many with bits of the safe sticking out of them.
Floyd | There is some disgusting turquoise sludge covering almost everything in
Floyd | the room, including the ceiling. Now and then globs of it fall to the
Floyd | floor.
Floyd |
Floyd | A bottle of the dreaded Dante Tomato Sauce, Triple-Extra Spicy stands
Floyd | here. Something is written on it. It is covered in turquoise sludge. It
Floyd | is closed.
Floyd |
Floyd | "The Ultimate Creature Manual" by Arthur Hippoman is here. According to
Floyd | the back it contains information about every single monster in the
Floyd | world, and how to defend yourself against them. It is suspiciously
Floyd | thin.
Floyd |
Floyd | Some sludge drip from the ceiling.
Floyd |
inky says, "hmm"
inky asks, "did we break what was in the safe?"
inky says (to Floyd), "get porcelain"
Floyd | >You pick up the largest piece of porcelain you can see. After studying
Floyd | it for a while you realize it belonged to a Ming vase. Judging by the
Floyd | amount of porcelain there must have been quite a lot of Ming vases in
Floyd | the safe. They would have been priceless. Disgruntled you throw the
Floyd | piece away.
Floyd |
Floyd | Lots of sludge drip from the ceiling.
Floyd |
inky says, "hrm"
DavidW says, "We probably want to pick up all our stuff."
inky says (to Floyd), "get all"
Floyd | >bottle: You pick up the bottle and clean off some sludge.
Floyd | Creature Manual: You pick up the book, and remove the bits of the safe
Floyd | that are stuck in the cover. Then you open the book and shake it.
Floyd | Sludge, and a very flat fish, drips out.
Floyd | dead fishes: Never mind the dead fishes.
Floyd | porcelain: You pick up the largest piece of porcelain you can see.
Floyd | After studying it for a while you realize it belonged to a Ming vase.
Floyd | Judging by the amount of porcelain there must have been quite a lot of
Floyd | Ming vases in the safe. They would have been priceless. Disgruntled you
Floyd | throw the piece away.
Floyd | safe door: Never mind the safe door.
Floyd | safe pieces: Never mind the safe pieces.
Floyd | sludge: Never mind the sludge.
Floyd | shoal of fish: You manage to catch a fat fish.
Floyd |
Floyd | Lots of sludge drip from the ceiling.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "l"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Large cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the northwest and southeast.
Floyd | A shoal of small fish crawls around on the floor. They look creepy.
Floyd | Their skins are white and look almost transparent. Their eyes are also
Floyd | white and don't have pupils.
Floyd | Big and small pieces of the safe are spread all around this room. The
Floyd | safe door has embedded itself halfway into the cave wall. There are
Floyd | quite a lot of pieces of porcelain spread around too. Lots and lots of
Floyd | dead fish lie around, many with bits of the safe sticking out of them.
Floyd | There is some disgusting turquoise sludge covering almost everything in
Floyd | the room, including the ceiling. Now and then globs of it fall to the
Floyd | floor.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "Stuff was probably thrown to other rooms."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "se"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Big cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit southeast to the outside, or you could go further
Floyd | into the mountain to the northwest.
Floyd | A somewhat larger than life-size statue of his holiness One-Hand Jack
Floyd | stands in the middle of the cave. Jack used to be an infamous pirate,
Floyd | but later formed Hoverism, a peaceful religion. The statue holds its
Floyd | left arm out and up, the hook at the end of it just low enough to be
Floyd | reached. The statue's head is gone.
Floyd | The Hoverist is hovering about a meter above the floor, cursing and
Floyd | trying to clean himself from the turquoise sludge that covers his body.
Floyd | Several fragments from the safe are lying here. Quite a lot of
Floyd | turquoise sludge is on the floor; most of it round the northwest exit.
Floyd |
Floyd | Though you cannot see it, you know that a Hustlespleen & Poe Coat of
Floyd | Invisibility hangs on the hook. It is supposed to turn visible (or turn
Floyd | invisible again) whenever you say the magic word "tango".
Floyd |
Floyd | A mail-ordered short metal staff with a clear orb on the end lies here.
Floyd | It has lots of turquoise sludge on it. Its manufacturers say the staff
Floyd | will remove any creature that comes in contact with the orb. Inside the
Floyd | orb you can see the goblin sidekick. He is now tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | "What happened here?" you say.
Floyd | "There was a large noise," says the Hoverist. "Then things came from
Floyd | the northeast. Your staff almost killed me, but I hovered out of the
Floyd | way, and it destroyed the head of my statue. My cave was filled with
Floyd | sludge."
Floyd | "Sorry about that."
Floyd | "When you reach the thirty-third stage of Hoverism you will realize
Floyd | there is no need for large indoor explosions."
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get all"
Floyd | >staff: You pick up the staff and clean off the sludge, making sure you
Floyd | do not touch the orb.
Floyd | safe pieces: Never mind the safe pieces.
Floyd | sludge: Never mind the sludge.
Floyd | statue: The statue is too heavy for that.
Floyd | Hoverist: You start toward the Hoverist, but he hovers up, out of your
Floyd | reach.
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "talk to hoverist"
Floyd | >"Could you teach me some more?" you ask.
Floyd | The Hoverist says, "Nobody can teach you what the third stage is, you
Floyd | must figure it out for yourself. That will take at least a few decades
Floyd | of constant hovering. When you have understood it, come talk to me
Floyd | again, and I will teach you the fourth stage: X-ray vision."
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "climb statue"
Floyd | >That's a bit awkward with the coat hanging from the hook. Try hanging
Floyd | from the coat.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "hang from coar"
Floyd | >You can't see any such thing.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "hang from coat"
Floyd | >You grab hold of the coat. You hang there dangling.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "climb"
Floyd | >What do you want to climb?
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "statue"
Floyd | >That's a bit awkward with the coat hanging from the hook. Try hanging
Floyd | from the coat.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "drop"
Floyd | >(the coat)
Floyd | You drop down.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "just wondering if the missing head meant something"
DavidW says, "Only that the rooms change a bit with time and damage and so on."
djfletch says, "our score went up by exploding the safe, but I don't know if it helped"
DavidW says, "It helped. Trust me."
inky asks, "I imagine it opened up a new exit, didn't it?"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "nw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Large cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the northwest and southeast.
Floyd | A shoal of small fish crawls around on the floor. They look creepy.
Floyd | Their skins are white and look almost transparent. Their eyes are also
Floyd | white and don't have pupils.
Floyd | Big and small pieces of the safe are spread all around this room. The
Floyd | safe door has embedded itself halfway into the cave wall. There are
Floyd | quite a lot of pieces of porcelain spread around too. Lots and lots of
Floyd | dead fish lie around, many with bits of the safe sticking out of them.
Floyd | There is some disgusting turquoise sludge covering almost everything in
Floyd | the room, including the ceiling. Now and then globs of it fall to the
Floyd | floor.
Floyd |
Floyd | Lots of sludge drip from the ceiling.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "nope"
djfletch says, "maybe the comedy god liked it"
DavidW says, "It did destroy the tentacle monster."
inky says, "hmm, true"
inky says (to Floyd), "hit goblin with staff"
Floyd | >There is not much you can do to stuff that is inside the orb.
Floyd |
Floyd | Some sludge drip from the ceiling.
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Also now we can put something else in the staff if we need to"
inky says, "oh right"
inky says, "I was thinking the staff was empty now but of course it isn't"
DavidW says, "This staff is one of the cool toys of IF. It's great fun."
djfletch asks, "ok where now?"
inky asks, "did we go to the room that is the topside of the safe?"
DavidW says, "There is no topside of the safe."
djfletch says, "the tight room was under the safe"
inky asks, "was the large cave the room with the safe in it?"
DavidW says, "yes"
djfletch says, "let's go and poke at the golem or the genie or something"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "se"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Big cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit southeast to the outside, or you could go further
Floyd | into the mountain to the northwest.
Floyd | A somewhat larger than life-size statue of his holiness One-Hand Jack
Floyd | stands in the middle of the cave. Jack used to be an infamous pirate,
Floyd | but later formed Hoverism, a peaceful religion. The statue holds its
Floyd | left arm out and up, the hook at the end of it just low enough to be
Floyd | reached. The statue's head is gone.
Floyd | The Hoverist is hovering about a meter above the floor, cursing and
Floyd | trying to clean himself from the turquoise sludge that covers his body.
Floyd | Several fragments from the safe are lying here. Quite a lot of
Floyd | turquoise sludge is on the floor; most of it round the northwest exit.
Floyd |
Floyd | Though you cannot see it, you know that a Hustlespleen & Poe Coat of
Floyd | Invisibility hangs on the hook. It is supposed to turn visible (or turn
Floyd | invisible again) whenever you say the magic word "tango".
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "se"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the south, or you can go
Floyd | further into the mountain to the north.
Floyd | A burly barbarian is leaning against a wall, his arms crossed over his
Floyd | naked chest, a grim expression on his face. A long sabre is in his
Floyd | belt.
Floyd | A tough-looking dwarf, wearing chain mail and a helmet, is sitting on
Floyd | the floor. He is holding an axe almost as big as himself. He is smoking
Floyd | a pipe.
Floyd | A muscular white horse and a mangy donkey stand here.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the north. There is
Floyd | also an exit to the south.
Floyd | A red automat, hundred of meters tall, stands in the middle of the
Floyd | cave. Despite the insane magnitude of the machine, its money-slot and
Floyd | buttons are normal-sized and placed at normal height. The
Floyd | merchandise-slot is also close to the floor, but huge enough to hold a
Floyd | horse. You have come across these automats before. Several companies
Floyd | have recently begun placing them in dangerous places, for adventurers
Floyd | who need equipment. They are easy to use; just buy something. Something
Floyd | is written on the automat next to the buttons.
Floyd | A stone altar stands up against a wall. It is low, shadowy,
Floyd | bloodstained and has runes written on it. Next to it is a huge pile of
Floyd | fish bones.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the altar you can see:
Floyd | A sluggish fish. Its eyes are white and have no pupils. It is crawling
Floyd | around.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "read automat"
Floyd | >Adventurer's Emporium's Convenient Equipment Automat: for everything
Floyd | an adventurer needs.
Floyd |   30 gold coins     Wheelbarrow
Floyd |   35 gold coins     Umbrella
Floyd |   35 gold coins     Roller skates
Floyd |   35 gold coins     Pogo stick
Floyd |   35 gold coins     Giant rubber band
Floyd |   40 gold coins     Spell of summoning: Aardvark
Floyd |   40 gold coins     Spell of metamorphosis: Chicken
Floyd |   40 gold coins     Lie detector pants
Floyd |   40 gold coins     Magical bag of unlimited water balloons
Floyd |   50 gold coins     Spell of summoning: Lawyer
Floyd |   50 gold coins     Spell of metamorphosis: Giant Sloth
Floyd |   50 gold coins     King-size box of assorted fireworks
Floyd |   50 gold coins     Horse
Floyd | 100 gold coins     Platoon of miniature zombies
Floyd | 500 gold coins     Necronomicon
Floyd |
dsimon asks, "Have we tried just giving a fish to the cat god in person?"
DavidW says, "nope. not yet."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >You try, but the bright light is too strong. It hurts your eyes.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "wear shades"
Floyd | >You put on the pair of mirrorshades.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Bumper cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the west. There is
Floyd | another exit to the northeast. Someone has chiseled gaps into the cave
Floyd | wall, forming a primitive ladder leading up to a hole in the ceiling.
Floyd | A table made from human skulls stands near the northeast exit. On the
Floyd | table stands a shimmering pink translucent cube and a small, rusty,
Floyd | holy grail.
Floyd | A small round stage stands close to the table. It is apparently made
Floyd | from human faces frozen in terrible screams.
Floyd | A small flamingo-headed man sits behind the table in a
Floyd | comfortable-looking armchair covered in obviously fake giraffe fur. He
Floyd | is wearing a jester's suit, including a ridiculous hat with bells on.
Floyd | He is staring at the pink cube.
Floyd | An armadillo-headed woman in a white toga sits next to him on a
Floyd | barstool made from green shimmering flames. She is reading a slim gray
Floyd | book called "Schrodinger's Goldfish: Confirmation of Negative Time".
Floyd | A cat-headed man sits next to her on a throne draped in black leather,
Floyd | with numerous spikes sticking out of it. He is tall, fat and dressed in
Floyd | a black leather jacket, black jeans and black leather boots.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "give fish to cat"
Floyd | >(the cat-headed man)
Floyd | "Don't you know the proper way of sacrificing something to a god?"
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Prodigious and very hot cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the east.
Floyd | It is terribly hot here. The intolerable temperature is almost
Floyd | certainly caused by the red-hot stone oven standing in a corner.
Floyd | A stone table stands in the middle of the cave. Round it stands a stone
Floyd | throne with an old troll, a stone chair with a tall troll, a stone
Floyd | stool with a short troll, and a large stone. The trolls look a bit like
Floyd | humans made of stone, though with no necks, bigger jaws, smaller eyes
Floyd | and huge arms and hands. They are playing some kind of card game.
Floyd | A golem, a man crudely made from stone, is standing here unmoving. Some
Floyd | runes have been chiseled into his chest.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a stone saxophone here.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >20 gold coins
Floyd | A staff (with the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | A fat fish
Floyd | A bottle (closed)
Floyd | A healing gun
Floyd | A nosehairscrew
Floyd | A manual
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | Mirrorshades
Floyd | A ring
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "put fish in oven"
Floyd | >Never mind the stone oven.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "push golem"
Floyd | >(the golem)
Floyd | You try to push the golem over, but it is too heavy.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "I'm out of ideas"
inky says, "hmm"
DavidW says, "Use the staff on various critters."
inky asks, "have we used the healing gun on anyone?"
DavidW says (to inky), "nope"
inky says, "I guess we could try to imprison the gods"
DavidW says, "It's a really good healing gun, too."
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at golem"
Floyd | >(the golem)
Floyd | You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | golem. Suddenly it seems a little less run-down.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at old troll"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | old troll. "Ur," he says. He touches himself under the left armpit.
Floyd | "The stalactite that grew on me! It is gone!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at tall troll"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | tall troll. "Ur," he says. He touches the top of his head. "The volcano
Floyd | growing on my head! It is gone!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at short troll"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | short troll. "Ur," he says. He lifts his foot and studies it. "The
Floyd | crystals forming between my toes! They are gone!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at short troll"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | short troll. "Ur," he says.
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at fish"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | fish. It wiggles happily.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "l"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Prodigious and very hot cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the east.
Floyd | It is terribly hot here. The intolerable temperature is almost
Floyd | certainly caused by the red-hot stone oven standing in a corner.
Floyd | A stone table stands in the middle of the cave. Round it stands a stone
Floyd | throne with an old troll, a stone chair with a tall troll, a stone
Floyd | stool with a short troll, and a large stone. The trolls look a bit like
Floyd | humans made of stone, though with no necks, bigger jaws, smaller eyes
Floyd | and huge arms and hands. They are playing some kind of card game.
Floyd | A golem, a man crudely made from stone, is standing here unmoving. Some
Floyd | runes have been chiseled into his chest.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a stone saxophone here.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Bumper cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the west. There is
Floyd | another exit to the northeast. Someone has chiseled gaps into the cave
Floyd | wall, forming a primitive ladder leading up to a hole in the ceiling.
Floyd | A table made from human skulls stands near the northeast exit. On the
Floyd | table stands a shimmering pink translucent cube and a small, rusty,
Floyd | holy grail.
Floyd | A small round stage stands close to the table. It is apparently made
Floyd | from human faces frozen in terrible screams.
Floyd | A small flamingo-headed man sits behind the table in a
Floyd | comfortable-looking armchair covered in obviously fake giraffe fur. He
Floyd | is wearing a jester's suit, including a ridiculous hat with bells on.
Floyd | He is staring at the pink cube.
Floyd | An armadillo-headed woman in a white toga sits next to him on a
Floyd | barstool made from green shimmering flames. She is reading a slim gray
Floyd | book called "Schrodinger's Goldfish: Confirmation of Negative Time".
Floyd | A cat-headed man sits next to her on a throne draped in black leather,
Floyd | with numerous spikes sticking out of it. He is tall, fat and dressed in
Floyd | a black leather jacket, black jeans and black leather boots.
Floyd |
djfletch asks, "could it bring the elf back to life maybe?"
inky says (to Floyd), "hit flamingo with staff"
Floyd | >(the flamingo-headed man with the staff)
Floyd | You hit the flamingo-headed man with the staff. He giggles and says,
Floyd | "Magic doesn't work on gods."
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at flamingo"
Floyd | >(the flamingo-headed man)
Floyd | You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | flamingo-headed man. Noting happens. He giggles and says, "Magic
Floyd | doesn't work on gods."
Floyd |
inky says, "hmm"
djfletch says, "or the monster that ate the elf"
inky asks, "ok how do we get there?"
DavidW says, "The monster and elf were at the ne branch after teleporting."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the north. There is
Floyd | also an exit to the south.
Floyd | A red automat, hundred of meters tall, stands in the middle of the
Floyd | cave. Despite the insane magnitude of the machine, its money-slot and
Floyd | buttons are normal-sized and placed at normal height. The
Floyd | merchandise-slot is also close to the floor, but huge enough to hold a
Floyd | horse. You have come across these automats before. Several companies
Floyd | have recently begun placing them in dangerous places, for adventurers
Floyd | who need equipment. They are easy to use; just buy something. Something
Floyd | is written on the automat next to the buttons.
Floyd | A stone altar stands up against a wall. It is low, shadowy,
Floyd | bloodstained and has runes written on it. Next to it is a huge pile of
Floyd | fish bones.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the altar you can see:
Floyd | A sluggish fish. Its eyes are white and have no pupils. It is crawling
Floyd | around.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the south, or you can go
Floyd | further into the mountain to the north.
Floyd | A burly barbarian is leaning against a wall, his arms crossed over his
Floyd | naked chest, a grim expression on his face. A long sabre is in his
Floyd | belt.
Floyd | A tough-looking dwarf, wearing chain mail and a helmet, is sitting on
Floyd | the floor. He is holding an axe almost as big as himself. He is smoking
Floyd | a pipe.
Floyd | A muscular white horse and a mangy donkey stand here.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "talk to barbarian"
Floyd | >(the barbarian)
Floyd | "What are you doing?" you ask.
Floyd | "Grirgr and the dwarf were sent to look for treasures. But Grirgr not
Floyd | stupid! He thinks, why risk our lives? So we wait here until somebody
Floyd | else finds treasure! Then we buy it!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "talk to dwarf"
Floyd | >"So, been here long?" you say. The dwarf nods.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "Also, the manual's barely been used."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at donkey"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | donkey. It looks surprised. The barbarian says: "Look, the wound on the
Floyd | side of the donkey, the one it got from that giant slug, it is gone."
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "sell healing gun to barbarian"
Floyd | >(the barbarian)
Floyd | "That's not a proper treasure!"
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "shoot barbarian with healing gun"
Floyd | >(the barbarian with the healing gun)
Floyd | You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | barbarian. "Huh?" he says. He looks down at himself. "Grirgr's scars!
Floyd | They are gone! Darnit, they made Grirgr look really cool!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "sell fish to barbarian"
Floyd | >(the barbarian)
Floyd | "That's not a proper treasure!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "sell bottle to barbarian"
Floyd | >(the barbarian)
Floyd | "That's not a proper treasure!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "give bottle to barbarian"
Floyd | >(the barbarian)
Floyd | "That's not a proper treasure!"
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "ne"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Vast cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the southwest. In the middle
Floyd | of the ceiling, high above you, is a round hole. On the floor, directly
Floyd | under the hole, is a pile of hay.
Floyd | A short lever with a handle sticks out from a wall. The handle has a
Floyd | thin, wide gap, large enough for the fingers of one hand to go through.
Floyd | A metallic pyramid, about half a meter high, sticks up from the cave
Floyd | floor. You once tested a hundred different teleporters, and you
Floyd | recognize the pyramid as one of the safest and least complicated
Floyd | models. To use it you just stand on it and shake the lever repeatedly.
Floyd | This particular teleporter seems badly designed though: the lever is
Floyd | far away from it, almost on the other side of the cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can hear a low humming coming from the teleporter.
Floyd |
Floyd | Up from the lever sticks the new magical sword from Adventurer's
Floyd | Emporium. According to the commercial it will start to vibrate when you
Floyd | are close to danger. It is shaking like crazy, but not enough to shake
Floyd | the lever.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a cage here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword goes even crazier and starts thrashing like a headless
Floyd | chicken on drugs.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The sound from the teleporter gets
Floyd | louder.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get on teleporter"
Floyd | >You get on the teleporter.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The sound gets even louder. A few
Floyd | electrical sparks shoots up from the teleporter. Your feet tickle.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "z"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The teleporter starts shaking and
Floyd | smoking. The cave begins to fade out around you, and another cave fades
Floyd | in.
Floyd |
Floyd | Voluminous cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit to the east. In the middle of the floor is a
Floyd | round hole.
Floyd | A huge dead monster lies here, its four feet in the air. It has a
Floyd | stupid-looking face on a round gray hairless body. Its tiny eyes stare
Floyd | at nothing. The upper half of a dead pointy-eared elf is sticking out
Floyd | of its mouth. It looks like the monster choked on the elf. The elf is
Floyd | wearing a backpack.
Floyd |
Floyd | You look down at yourself. You seem unsubstantial, like a ghost. Slowly
Floyd | you begin to take on a more solid form. Now you look normal.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at elf"
Floyd | >The healing gun is not THAT good!
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at monster"
Floyd | >The healing gun is not THAT good!
Floyd |
djfletch says, "oh well"
DavidW says, "The target still must be alive."
inky says, "hmm"
dsimon says, "Bah. I was hoping we could bring the macabre stage back to life as some kind of terrible abomination."
inky says, "I guess that leaves out the tentacle thing too"
inky says (to Floyd), "hit monster with stafdf"
Floyd | >You can't see any such thing.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit monster with staff"
Floyd | >Nothing happens. Guess it only works with the living.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "fwiw, you can look up the monster in the manual."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "read 2"
Floyd | >So, you have spotted a monster. How many legs does it have?
Floyd | None: read page 3
Floyd | One: read page 35
Floyd | Two: read page 36
Floyd | Three: read page 62
Floyd | Four: read page 63
Floyd | Six: read page 86
Floyd | Eight: read page 87
Floyd | Forty eight billion and five: read page 90
Floyd | It varies: read page 91
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "read 63"
Floyd | >Does it have hooves?
Floyd | Yes: read page 64
Floyd | No: read page 72
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "read 72"
Floyd | >Is it hairy?
Floyd | Yes: read page 73
Floyd | No: read page 79
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "read 79"
Floyd | >Does it have large bulging eyes?
Floyd | No: read page 80
Floyd | Yes: read page 81
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "read 80"
Floyd | >It is a Gloov. The Gloov has no brain, and steals all its thoughts
Floyd | from other creatures. If a mosquito thinks about sucking your blood,
Floyd | the Gloov might also try to suck your blood, which would be bad,
Floyd | considering it is bigger than a horse. If it is near a bird that thinks
Floyd | about flying, the Gloov might end up crushing someone, as it has no
Floyd | wings. To get rid of it, think very hard about running away or bashing
Floyd | your head against a rock.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take backpack"
Floyd | >Some of the monster's teeth stick through the lower half of the
Floyd | backpack, and thus the backpack is stuck.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "think of opening mouth"
Floyd | >I only understood you as far as wanting to think.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "open backpack"
Floyd | >That's already open.
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Ah, I see i'm a little late to the party"
djfletch says, "I think we got something from there, I forget what"
DavidW says, "This is where we got the healing gun, shades, and something else."
DavidW says, "oh yeah, the nosescrew"
DavidW says, "nosehairscrew"
inky says, "I wonder what that is good for"
DavidW says, "I remember that part."
DavidW says, "If you need a direction, we can tackle the genie next."
inky says, "ok!"
inky says (to Floyd), "d"
Floyd | >You jump down the hole. You land in a pile of hay. You get up.
Floyd |
Floyd | Vast cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the southwest. In the middle
Floyd | of the ceiling, high above you, is a round hole. On the floor, directly
Floyd | under the hole, is a pile of hay.
Floyd | A short lever with a handle sticks out from a wall. The handle has a
Floyd | thin, wide gap, large enough for the fingers of one hand to go through.
Floyd | A metallic pyramid, about half a meter high, sticks up from the cave
Floyd | floor. You once tested a hundred different teleporters, and you
Floyd | recognize the pyramid as one of the safest and least complicated
Floyd | models. To use it you just stand on it and shake the lever repeatedly.
Floyd | This particular teleporter seems badly designed though: the lever is
Floyd | far away from it, almost on the other side of the cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | Up from the lever sticks the new magical sword from Adventurer's
Floyd | Emporium. According to the commercial it will start to vibrate when you
Floyd | are close to danger. It is shaking like crazy, but not enough to shake
Floyd | the lever.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a cage here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword goes even crazier and starts thrashing like a headless
Floyd | chicken on drugs.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. There comes a low humming sound from
Floyd | the teleporter.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "sw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the south, or you can go
Floyd | further into the mountain to the north.
Floyd | A burly barbarian is leaning against a wall, his arms crossed over his
Floyd | naked chest, a grim expression on his face. A long sabre is in his
Floyd | belt.
Floyd | A tough-looking dwarf, wearing chain mail and a helmet, is sitting on
Floyd | the floor. He is holding an axe almost as big as himself. He is smoking
Floyd | a pipe.
Floyd | A muscular white horse and a mangy donkey stand here.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the north. There is
Floyd | also an exit to the south.
Floyd | A red automat, hundred of meters tall, stands in the middle of the
Floyd | cave. Despite the insane magnitude of the machine, its money-slot and
Floyd | buttons are normal-sized and placed at normal height. The
Floyd | merchandise-slot is also close to the floor, but huge enough to hold a
Floyd | horse. You have come across these automats before. Several companies
Floyd | have recently begun placing them in dangerous places, for adventurers
Floyd | who need equipment. They are easy to use; just buy something. Something
Floyd | is written on the automat next to the buttons.
Floyd | A stone altar stands up against a wall. It is low, shadowy,
Floyd | bloodstained and has runes written on it. Next to it is a huge pile of
Floyd | fish bones.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the altar you can see:
Floyd | A sluggish fish. Its eyes are white and have no pupils. It is crawling
Floyd | around.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Tremendous Cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the
Floyd | south.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | A genie floats about a meter above the ground. He looks like a man made
Floyd | of ice. He is bald, but has a beard of icicles. He has no legs; his
Floyd | stomach rises from a small cloud of icy steam. He holds an ice sabre.
Floyd | A hippoman, half man, half hippo, stands knitting something yellow. He
Floyd | is fat, purple and has two very thick legs. He is wearing your helmet.
Floyd | A young angry-looking woman stands holding a large placard saying "Save
Floyd | the monsters!" She is clearly one of those monster rights activists
Floyd | that have been making your job so much harder lately.
Floyd | The gremlin has climbed quite high up on the wall. He is a small green
Floyd | humanoid creature with pointy ears. He is wearing a tiny ring and is
Floyd | smoking a tiny cigarette.
Floyd | A large metal chest stands up against a wall. It is closed.
Floyd | A large machine is at the back of the cave. Its mechanisms looks very
Floyd | complex. Actually it is very easy to use. You know this because on a
Floyd | previous product-testing mission you came across a machine just like it
Floyd | and spend four hours trying to figure out how it worked. The machine is
Floyd | for sharpening tools and weapons. Just put what you want sharpened into
Floyd | it and wait.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a big tacky holy grail here.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "open chest"
Floyd | >Just as you are about to open the chest, the genie rushes towards you
Floyd | swinging his sabre. You jump back. The genie says, "That is my chest!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "talk to genie"
Floyd | >"So you are a genie, eh?" you say. "I wish I had a nice big treasure."
Floyd | "Dream on, transient creature."
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at gremlin"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | gremlin. Suddenly a good feeling fills your body.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at woman"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | woman. She makes a little jump. "My psychosomatic guilt complex! It is
Floyd | gone," she says.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "talk to woman"
Floyd | >You ask, "Why are you trying to save the monsters anyway?"
Floyd | "Are you kidding? Don't you know that each year 40 species of monsters
Floyd | go extinct because of adventurers?"
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at me"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits you.
Floyd | You don't feel anything. The gremlin grins.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at hippoman"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | hippoman. A shiver goes through his body. "My ear-maggots! I can't feel
Floyd | them anymore," he says.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at genie"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | genie. "Ah!" he says. "The broken icicles on my beard. They are whole
Floyd | again!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >20 gold coins
Floyd | A staff (with the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | A fat fish
Floyd | A bottle (closed)
Floyd | A healing gun
Floyd | A nosehairscrew
Floyd | A manual
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | Mirrorshades
Floyd | A ring
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit genie with staff"
Floyd | >The genie vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin sidekick appears hovering in the air, but immediately falls
Floyd | down.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the genie is inside the orb now, tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "open chest"
Floyd | >Just as you are about to open the chest, the woman starts hitting you
Floyd | with her placard shouting, "I won't let you open the genie's chest
Floyd | while he's not here!"
Floyd |
inky says, "bah"
inky says (to Floyd), "hit woman with staff"
Floyd | >The monster rights activist vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The genie appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the monster rights activist is inside the orb now, tiny
Floyd | and unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | The genie says, "Foolish mortal! Think you can confuse me with your
Floyd | magic stick?"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "open chest"
Floyd | >Just as you are about to open the chest, the genie rushes towards you
Floyd | swinging his sabre. You jump back. The genie says, "That is my chest!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit goblin with staff"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick with the staff)
Floyd | The goblin sidekick vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The monster rights activist appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the goblin sidekick is inside the orb now, tiny and
Floyd | unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | The woman smacks you with her placard shouting, "Fiendish necromancer!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "give fish to woman"
Floyd | >"Think you can bribe me away, you beast slaughterer?"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "give manual to woman"
Floyd | >"Think you can bribe me away, you beast slaughterer?"
Floyd |
djfletch asks, "wonder if the genie is in the book?"
inky says (to Floyd), "give bottle to woman"
Floyd | >"Think you can bribe me away, you beast slaughterer?"
Floyd |
inky says, "ah hmm"
inky says (to Floyd), "read book"
Floyd | >You must say what page to read, like "read page 1" or "read 1"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 1"
Floyd | >On the front is a badly drawn picture of three monsters running away
Floyd | from a man who is holding a copy of the book over his head.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 2"
Floyd | >So, you have spotted a monster. How many legs does it have?
Floyd | None: read page 3
Floyd | One: read page 35
Floyd | Two: read page 36
Floyd | Three: read page 62
Floyd | Four: read page 63
Floyd | Six: read page 86
Floyd | Eight: read page 87
Floyd | Forty eight billion and five: read page 90
Floyd | It varies: read page 91
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "look"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Tremendous Cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the
Floyd | south.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | A genie floats about a meter above the ground. He looks like a man made
Floyd | of ice. He is bald, but has a beard of icicles. He has no legs; his
Floyd | stomach rises from a small cloud of icy steam. He holds an ice sabre.
Floyd | A hippoman, half man, half hippo, stands knitting something yellow. He
Floyd | is fat, purple and has two very thick legs. He is wearing your helmet.
Floyd | A young angry-looking woman stands holding a large placard saying "Save
Floyd | the monsters!" She is clearly one of those monster rights activists
Floyd | that have been making your job so much harder lately.
Floyd | The gremlin has climbed quite high up on the wall. He is a small green
Floyd | humanoid creature with pointy ears. He is wearing a tiny ring and is
Floyd | smoking a tiny cigarette.
Floyd | A large metal chest stands up against a wall. It is closed.
Floyd | A large machine is at the back of the cave. Its mechanisms looks very
Floyd | complex. Actually it is very easy to use. You know this because on a
Floyd | previous product-testing mission you came across a machine just like it
Floyd | and spend four hours trying to figure out how it worked. The machine is
Floyd | for sharpening tools and weapons. Just put what you want sharpened into
Floyd | it and wait.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a big tacky holy grail here.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "read 36"
Floyd | >Does it have wings?
Floyd | Yes: read page 37
Floyd | No: read page 45
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 3"
Floyd | >Which of the following body parts does it have?
Floyd | Fins: read page 4
Floyd | Branches: read page 8
Floyd | Tentacles: read page 11
Floyd | Arms: read page 14
Floyd | None of the above: read page 29
Floyd |
djfletch says, "oh wait - an icy genie and the hot sauce"
inky says, "oops"
dsimon says, "Heh, I was going to look up the human"
inky says, "ha ha"
Jacqueline says, "Wowza. You're still going."
DavidW says, "This is a large game."
inky says, "I think we're only like half done"
dsimon asks, "Hm, okay, what if we trap the woman in the orb, then exchange back with the goblin somewhere she can't escape from, then come back and trap the genie?"
inky says, "well, finish looking up stuff"
inky says (to Floyd), "read 45"
Floyd | >What does the skin on its body look like?
Floyd | Like human skin: read page 46
Floyd | Green: read page 53
Floyd | Purple: read page 58
Floyd | Like rock: read page 59
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 46"
Floyd | >What does its head look like?
Floyd | Like a human head: 47
Floyd | Like an animal head: read page 52
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 47"
Floyd | >How high is it?
Floyd | About human size: read page 48
Floyd | About half human size: read page 51
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 48"
Floyd | >How does its ears look like?
Floyd | Like human ears: read page 49
Floyd | Pointy: read page 50
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 49"
Floyd | >Well, it probably is a Human then. Though occasionally nice, Humans
Floyd | usually becomes members in whatever culture that happens to be around,
Floyd | no matter how destructive or stupid that culture is. Then they become
Floyd | so convinced that their culture is the best one that they start killing
Floyd | off everybody who does not belong to it. Humans drink blood, and do not
Floyd | cast reflections. The best way to kill one is with a stake through the
Floyd | heart.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 14" djfletch says, "hehe"
Floyd | >When partaking in tea, how many lumps of sugar does it use?
Floyd | Two: read page 15
Floyd | Three: read page 22
Floyd |
DavidW says, "I think you goofed."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "read 50"
Floyd | >It is an Elf. They are supposed to be noble warriors, able to
Floyd | communicate with nature and full of ancient wisdom. Actually they are
Floyd | just a bunch of hippies that have had their ears surgically altered.
Floyd | Harmless.
Floyd |
inky says, "hmm, I don't get the genie"
inky says (to Floyd), "read 15"
Floyd | >What form of art does it find most delightful?
Floyd | Opera: read page 16
Floyd | Interpretative dance: read page 19
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 22"
Floyd | >What word best describes its taste in furniture?
Floyd | Conservative: read page 23
Floyd | Fashionable: read page 26
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 26"
Floyd | >How would it prefer to spend a leisurely moment?
Floyd | Reading: read page 27
Floyd | Antiqueing: read page 28
Floyd |
djfletch asks, "does the genie have no legs?"
inky says (to Floyd), "read 28"
Floyd | >It is a Transdimensional Bull Genie. It exists in one million
Floyd | universes at the same time. To destroy it, you must decide on one exact
Floyd | moment to do so, no less than two hours in the future. By that time
Floyd | your universe will have split into more than one million universes (as
Floyd | it is always doing), and if all the versions of you in all the million
Floyd | universes attack the Transdimensional Bull Genie at exactly the same
Floyd | time, it can be killed. However if one of you fails to attack it, or
Floyd | somehow botches the attack, you will only have angered it, so do not
Floyd | attempt this unless you can trust yourself to be perfectly brave,
Floyd | perfectly competent and perfectly punctual.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "Genie has no legs, correct."
inky says (to Floyd), "read 27"
Floyd | >It is a Moldavian Christmas Genie. It is not allowed to hurt anybody
Floyd | on Christmas Eve. Just detain it until the 24th of December, and then
Floyd | trick it into killing somebody and it will cease to exist.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 23"
Floyd | >To what degree does it think correct attire for any occasion is
Floyd | important?
Floyd | Very: read page 24
Floyd | Extremely: read page 25
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 24"
Floyd | >It is a Half-Scandinavian Chaos Genie. It is colorblind and shapeblind
Floyd | and can only see sizes. By having the exact same size as one or
Floyd | preferably several objects in the Genie's vicinity, you may confuse it
Floyd | so much that it will not attack you, though a more likely outcome is
Floyd | that it will attack both you and everything your size.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 25"
Floyd | >It is a Common Wishing Genie. By rubbing its lamp you should be able
Floyd | to control it and make it grant your wishes. Unfortunately the Common
Floyd | Wishing Genies have caught on to this, and have now started hiding
Floyd | their lamps, often far off in other countries.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "I'm pretty sure this is an ice genie. It's all into cold stuff."
inky says, "well yeah probably"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "give bottle to genie"
Floyd | >"Foolish mortal! None of your pathetic possessions have any interest
Floyd | to me!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 16"
Floyd | >In its opinion capitalism is best described as...
Floyd | ...the lesser of several evils: read page 17
Floyd | ...a mere fad: read page 18
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 19"
Floyd | >What does it think of the early poetry of Jasper Wull?
Floyd | Slightly overrated: read page 20
Floyd | Slightly underrated: read page 21
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 17"
Floyd | >It is a Minor Brazilian Quantum Genie. It feeds off math. If you draw
Floyd | an equation on a blackboard it will eat it. If you include some logical
Floyd | flaw in the equation, the genie will choke on it. However make sure the
Floyd | flaw is subtile, because if the genie, which is a math genius, notices
Floyd | the flaw it will not eat the equation but rather get upset and tear you
Floyd | into atoms.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 18"
Floyd | >It is a North Canadian Sensitivity Genie, one of the few creatures
Floyd | capable of having fatal emotions. Simply show it a photograph of it as
Floyd | a baby while remarking on how cute it looked, or read aloud from a love
Floyd | letter it wrote as a teen and it will likely die of embarrassment.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 20"
Floyd | >It is a Mock Tropical Cerebral Genie. It only respects creatures that
Floyd | are smarter than itself. Simply stand close to it and do something
Floyd | impressive like invent an antigravity device or discover a cure for the
Floyd | common cold, and it will not harm you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 21"
Floyd | >It is a Near-Mythological British Migrating Genie. It feeds off the
Floyd | depressions of others. If you trap it for a fortnight in a room full of
Floyd | optimists it will die of malnutrition.
Floyd |
inky says, "ok, I give up"
DavidW says, "I'm surprised you guys are having trouble with this. You solved tougher problems earlier."
inky says (to Floyd), "throw bottle at genie"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "throw bottle at genie"
Floyd | >You throw the bottle. It smashes into the genie, then falls to the
Floyd | ground.
Floyd | The genie says, "Foolish mortal! Think you can hurt me that easily?"
Floyd |
Floyd | >(first taking the bottle)
Floyd | You throw the bottle. It smashes into the genie, then falls to the
Floyd | ground.
Floyd | The genie says, "Foolish mortal! Think you can hurt me that easily?"
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
inky says (to Floyd), "get bottle"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >20 gold coins
Floyd | A staff (with the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | A fat fish
Floyd | A bottle (closed)
Floyd | A healing gun
Floyd | A nosehairscrew
Floyd | A manual
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | Mirrorshades
Floyd | A ring
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get sabre"
Floyd | >Never mind the sabre.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "there is that oven as well, although it might just be scenery"
Jacqueline says (to David), "I have no idea what the issue is, but I'm glad you're being nonjudgmental and supportive about it."
inky says (to Floyd), "talk to genie"
Floyd | >You ask, "If you drank tea, how many lumps of sugar would you use?"
Floyd | "Don't bother me with your moronic chit chat, transient creature."
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "talk to genie"
Floyd | >You ask, "If you drank tea, how many lumps of sugar would you use?"
Floyd | "Don't bother me with your moronic chit chat, transient creature."
Floyd |
DavidW asks, "Do we need a hint?"
inky says, "sure"
DavidW says, "Fight ice with heat."
inky says, "well ok"
DavidW says, "(and not the hot sauce)"
inky says, "oh, I see"
inky says, "er"
inky says (to Floyd), "l"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Tremendous Cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the
Floyd | south.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | A genie floats about a meter above the ground. He looks like a man made
Floyd | of ice. He is bald, but has a beard of icicles. He has no legs; his
Floyd | stomach rises from a small cloud of icy steam. He holds an ice sabre.
Floyd | A hippoman, half man, half hippo, stands knitting something yellow. He
Floyd | is fat, purple and has two very thick legs. He is wearing your helmet.
Floyd | A young angry-looking woman stands holding a large placard saying "Save
Floyd | the monsters!" She is clearly one of those monster rights activists
Floyd | that have been making your job so much harder lately.
Floyd | The gremlin has climbed quite high up on the wall. He is a small green
Floyd | humanoid creature with pointy ears. He is wearing a tiny ring and is
Floyd | smoking a tiny cigarette.
Floyd | A large metal chest stands up against a wall. It is closed.
Floyd | A large machine is at the back of the cave. Its mechanisms looks very
Floyd | complex. Actually it is very easy to use. You know this because on a
Floyd | previous product-testing mission you came across a machine just like it
Floyd | and spend four hours trying to figure out how it worked. The machine is
Floyd | for sharpening tools and weapons. Just put what you want sharpened into
Floyd | it and wait.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a big tacky holy grail here.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "we could put it in the staff and put the staff in the oven"
inky says (to Floyd), "hit genie with staff"
Floyd | >The genie vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin sidekick appears hovering in the air, but immediately falls
Floyd | down.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the genie is inside the orb now, tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Prodigious and very hot cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the east.
Floyd | It is terribly hot here. The intolerable temperature is almost
Floyd | certainly caused by the red-hot stone oven standing in a corner.
Floyd | A stone table stands in the middle of the cave. Round it stands a stone
Floyd | throne with an old troll, a stone chair with a tall troll, a stone
Floyd | stool with a short troll, and a large stone. The trolls look a bit like
Floyd | humans made of stone, though with no necks, bigger jaws, smaller eyes
Floyd | and huge arms and hands. They are playing some kind of card game.
Floyd | A golem, a man crudely made from stone, is standing here unmoving. Some
Floyd | runes have been chiseled into his chest.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a stone saxophone here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit goblin with staff"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick with the staff)
Floyd | The goblin sidekick vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The genie appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the goblin sidekick is inside the orb now, tiny and
Floyd | unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | The genie says, "Foolish mortal! Think you um...aaargh!"
Floyd | Water is dripping from the genie. "I'm melting! I'm melting!" he
Floyd | screams.
Floyd | He quickly flies towards the exit, but it's too late. Soon he is
Floyd | nothing but a puddle, and not long after even that has evaporated.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by four points.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "l"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Prodigious and very hot cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the east.
Floyd | It is terribly hot here. The intolerable temperature is almost
Floyd | certainly caused by the red-hot stone oven standing in a corner.
Floyd | A stone table stands in the middle of the cave. Round it stands a stone
Floyd | throne with an old troll, a stone chair with a tall troll, a stone
Floyd | stool with a short troll, and a large stone. The trolls look a bit like
Floyd | humans made of stone, though with no necks, bigger jaws, smaller eyes
Floyd | and huge arms and hands. They are playing some kind of card game.
Floyd | A golem, a man crudely made from stone, is standing here unmoving. Some
Floyd | runes have been chiseled into his chest.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a stone saxophone here.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Tremendous Cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the
Floyd | south.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | A hippoman, half man, half hippo, stands knitting something yellow. He
Floyd | is fat, purple and has two very thick legs. He is wearing your helmet.
Floyd | A young angry-looking woman stands holding a large placard saying
Floyd | "Adventurers go home!" She is clearly one of those monster rights
Floyd | activists that have been making your job so much harder lately.
Floyd | The gremlin has climbed quite high up on the wall. He is a small green
Floyd | humanoid creature with pointy ears. He is wearing a tiny ring and is
Floyd | smoking a tiny cigarette.
Floyd | A large metal chest stands up against a wall. It is closed.
Floyd | A large machine is at the back of the cave. Its mechanisms looks very
Floyd | complex. Actually it is very easy to use. You know this because on a
Floyd | previous product-testing mission you came across a machine just like it
Floyd | and spend four hours trying to figure out how it worked. The machine is
Floyd | for sharpening tools and weapons. Just put what you want sharpened into
Floyd | it and wait.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a big tacky holy grail here.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit woman with staff"
Floyd | >The monster rights activist vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin sidekick appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the monster rights activist is inside the orb now, tiny
Floyd | and unmoving.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "open chest"
Floyd | >You open the chest. It contains nothing but a carrot. Wait a second,
Floyd | that's a very strange carrot! It has arms. And legs. And wings! The
Floyd | arms and legs are like those of a human, only smaller. It has no face.
Floyd | Suddenly the carrot flies up, and starts zipping around the cave.
Floyd | Sparks begin to fall from all over its body and each spark disappears
Floyd | before hitting the ground.
Floyd |
inky says, "bwuh"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "read book"
Floyd | >You must say what page to read, like "read page 1" or "read 1"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "look"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Tremendous Cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the
Floyd | south.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | A hippoman, half man, half hippo, stands knitting something yellow. He
Floyd | is fat, purple and has two very thick legs. He is wearing your helmet.
Floyd | The gremlin has climbed quite high up on the wall. He is a small green
Floyd | humanoid creature with pointy ears. He is wearing a tiny ring and is
Floyd | smoking a tiny cigarette.
Floyd | A carrot with tiny wings flies around. Its arms and legs look like
Floyd | those of a human, only much smaller. It has no head or face. A steady
Floyd | shower of shimmering sparks falls from all over its body; each spark
Floyd | disappears before hitting the ground.
Floyd | A large metal chest stands up against a wall. It is open and empty.
Floyd | A large machine is at the back of the cave. Its mechanisms looks very
Floyd | complex. Actually it is very easy to use. You know this because on a
Floyd | previous product-testing mission you came across a machine just like it
Floyd | and spend four hours trying to figure out how it worked. The machine is
Floyd | for sharpening tools and weapons. Just put what you want sharpened into
Floyd | it and wait.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see the goblin sidekick and a big tacky holy grail here.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "read 2"
Floyd | >So, you have spotted a monster. How many legs does it have?
Floyd | None: read page 3
Floyd | One: read page 35
Floyd | Two: read page 36
Floyd | Three: read page 62
Floyd | Four: read page 63
Floyd | Six: read page 86
Floyd | Eight: read page 87
Floyd | Forty eight billion and five: read page 90
Floyd | It varies: read page 91
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "read 36"
Floyd | >Does it have wings?
Floyd | Yes: read page 37
Floyd | No: read page 45
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "37"
Floyd | >That's not a verb I recognise.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "read 37"
Floyd | >Does it have a beak?
Floyd | Yes: read page 38
Floyd | No:  read page 42
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "read 42"
Floyd | >Does it have a head?
Floyd | Yes: read page 43
Floyd | No: read page 44
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "read 44"
Floyd | >It could be a Vegetable Fairy. Supposedly they are small with humanoid
Floyd | arms and legs and with a vegetable for a body; a different vegetable
Floyd | for each Vegetable Fairy. According to legend you gain a magical power
Floyd | if you lick a Vegetable Fairy: if you lick the Celery Fairy the lower
Floyd | half of your body becomes weightless, if you lick the Rutabaga Fairy
Floyd | you become immune to soap, and so on. Since the Vegetable Fairy is
Floyd | almost certainly fictional I am not going to say how to defeat it. You
Floyd | have probably just found some bird that has gotten it's head cut off.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "lick carrot"
Floyd | >You bend down towards the carrot, sticking out your tongue. The carrot
Floyd | doesn't fly away. You lick the carrot. It tastes carroty. Suddenly your
Floyd | eyesight is marginally better. Of course you already had pretty good
Floyd | eyesight.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "goblin, lick carrot"
Floyd | >The goblin licks the carrot. "Hey," says the goblin. "My eyesight!
Floyd | It's good again! I can see everything clearly now!"
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
DavidW says, "hooray"
inky says, "I don't know where the runes are"
DavidW says, "They're way south, then way nw"
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the north. There is
Floyd | also an exit to the south.
Floyd | A red automat, hundred of meters tall, stands in the middle of the
Floyd | cave. Despite the insane magnitude of the machine, its money-slot and
Floyd | buttons are normal-sized and placed at normal height. The
Floyd | merchandise-slot is also close to the floor, but huge enough to hold a
Floyd | horse. You have come across these automats before. Several companies
Floyd | have recently begun placing them in dangerous places, for adventurers
Floyd | who need equipment. They are easy to use; just buy something. Something
Floyd | is written on the automat next to the buttons.
Floyd | A stone altar stands up against a wall. It is low, shadowy,
Floyd | bloodstained and has runes written on it. Next to it is a huge pile of
Floyd | fish bones.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the altar you can see:
Floyd | A sluggish fish. Its eyes are white and have no pupils. It is crawling
Floyd | around.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the south, or you can go
Floyd | further into the mountain to the north.
Floyd | A burly barbarian is leaning against a wall, his arms crossed over his
Floyd | naked chest, a grim expression on his face. A long sabre is in his
Floyd | belt.
Floyd | A tough-looking dwarf, wearing chain mail and a helmet, is sitting on
Floyd | the floor. He is holding an axe almost as big as himself. He is smoking
Floyd | a pipe.
Floyd | A muscular white horse and a mangy donkey stand here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit goblin with staff"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick with the staff)
Floyd | The goblin sidekick vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The monster rights activist appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the goblin sidekick is inside the orb now, tiny and
Floyd | unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | The monster rights activist smacks you with her placard shouting,
Floyd | "Kidnapping sicko!", before running off in the direction you found her.
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
inky says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | >Spacious cave
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says, "I was hoping she would hassle those guys"
inky says (to Floyd), "nw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Big cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit southeast to the outside, or you could go further
Floyd | into the mountain to the northwest.
Floyd | A somewhat larger than life-size statue of his holiness One-Hand Jack
Floyd | stands in the middle of the cave. Jack used to be an infamous pirate,
Floyd | but later formed Hoverism, a peaceful religion. The statue holds its
Floyd | left arm out and up, the hook at the end of it just low enough to be
Floyd | reached. The statue's head is gone.
Floyd | An old Hoverist is hovering about a meter above the floor. He is
Floyd | sitting in the lotus position, his head is turned towards the statue,
Floyd | and his eyes are closed. He is wearing a white loincloth.
Floyd | Several fragments from the safe are lying here. Quite a lot of
Floyd | turquoise sludge is on the floor; most of it round the northwest exit.
Floyd |
Floyd | Though you cannot see it, you know that a Hustlespleen & Poe Coat of
Floyd | Invisibility hangs on the hook. It is supposed to turn visible (or turn
Floyd | invisible again) whenever you say the magic word "tango".
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "nw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Large cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the northwest and southeast.
Floyd | A shoal of small fish crawls around on the floor. They look creepy.
Floyd | Their skins are white and look almost transparent. Their eyes are also
Floyd | white and don't have pupils.
Floyd | Big and small pieces of the safe are spread all around this room. The
Floyd | safe door has embedded itself halfway into the cave wall. There are
Floyd | quite a lot of pieces of porcelain spread around too. Lots and lots of
Floyd | dead fish lie around, many with bits of the safe sticking out of them.
Floyd | There is some disgusting turquoise sludge covering almost everything in
Floyd | the room, including the ceiling. Now and then globs of it fall to the
Floyd | floor.
Floyd |
Floyd | Suddenly your eyesight is marginally worse again.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | A big blob of sludge falls from the ceiling and splashes into the
Floyd | sludge below.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "nw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Enormous cave
Floyd | The only exit from this cave is to the southeast.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | Several fragments from the safe are lying here. Quite a bit of
Floyd | turquoise sludge is on the floor; most of it around the southeast exit.
Floyd |
Floyd | You hear the goblin shout "Oh no, my eye-sight is back to normal!"
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says, "agh, a timer"
DavidW says, "yeah, sorry."
inky says, "agh agh agh"
inky asks, "did I waste a turn or does it have exactly not enough?"
DavidW It's exactly not enough. inky says, "ok fine"
inky says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
inky says (to Floyd), "cf12"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "brief"
Floyd | >The game is now in its normal brief printing mode, which gives long
Floyd | descriptions of places never before visited and short descriptions
Floyd | otherwise.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "se. se. se"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Large cave
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | Some sludge drip from the ceiling.
Floyd |
Floyd | Big cave
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "n.n.n."
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Tremendous Cave
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a big tacky holy grail here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "woot. A use for 'brief'."
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, lick carrot"
Floyd | >The goblin licks the carrot. "Hey," says the goblin. "My eyesight!
Floyd | It's good again! I can see everything clearly now!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit goblin with staff"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick with the staff)
Floyd | The goblin sidekick vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The monster rights activist appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the goblin sidekick is inside the orb now, tiny and
Floyd | unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | The woman smacks you with her placard shouting, "Fiendish necromancer!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "s.s.s.s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd |
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd |
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "nw.nw.nw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Big cave
Floyd |
Floyd | Large cave
Floyd |
Floyd | Lots of sludge drip from the ceiling.
Floyd |
Floyd | Enormous cave
Floyd |
inky says, "hm, wait, this doesn't help unless I can get him out again"
inky says (to Floyd), "l"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Enormous cave
Floyd | The only exit from this cave is to the southeast.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | Several fragments from the safe are lying here. Quite a bit of
Floyd | turquoise sludge is on the floor; most of it around the southeast exit.
Floyd |
DavidW asks, "You have a fish?"
inky says (to Floyd), "hit fish with staff"
Floyd | >The fat fish vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin sidekick appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the fat fish is inside the orb now, tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, read runes"
Floyd | >The goblin looks at the runes. "Ah," he says, "it's instructions for
Floyd | how to open the child-proof lid of the Dante Tomato Sauce."
Floyd | The goblin explains to you how to open the bottle.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by five points.]
Floyd |
inky says, "huzzah"
djfletch says, "yay"
inky says (to Floyd), "hit goblin with staff"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick with the staff)
Floyd | The goblin sidekick vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The fat fish appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the goblin sidekick is inside the orb now, tiny and
Floyd | unmoving.
Floyd |
inky says, "I guess there is an unstated joke here that you are supposed to be testing out the goblin but he is spending half his time locked away"
inky says (to Floyd), "get fish"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "se.se.se"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Large cave
Floyd |
Floyd | Lots of sludge drip from the ceiling.
Floyd |
Floyd | Big cave
Floyd |
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "n.n.n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd |
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd |
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "verbose"
Floyd | >The game is now in its verbose mode, which always gives long
Floyd | descriptions of locations (even if you've been there before).
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "l"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the north. There is
Floyd | also an exit to the south.
Floyd | A red automat, hundred of meters tall, stands in the middle of the
Floyd | cave. Despite the insane magnitude of the machine, its money-slot and
Floyd | buttons are normal-sized and placed at normal height. The
Floyd | merchandise-slot is also close to the floor, but huge enough to hold a
Floyd | horse. You have come across these automats before. Several companies
Floyd | have recently begun placing them in dangerous places, for adventurers
Floyd | who need equipment. They are easy to use; just buy something. Something
Floyd | is written on the automat next to the buttons.
Floyd | A stone altar stands up against a wall. It is low, shadowy,
Floyd | bloodstained and has runes written on it. Next to it is a huge pile of
Floyd | fish bones.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the altar you can see:
Floyd | A sluggish fish. Its eyes are white and have no pupils. It is crawling
Floyd | around.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "open hot sauce"
Floyd | >You can't see any such thing.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "open bottle"
Floyd | >You open the bottle.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "pour hot sauce on fish"
Floyd | >You can't see any such thing.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "i"
Floyd | >20 gold coins.
Floyd | A mail-ordered short metal staff with a clear orb on the end. Its
Floyd | manufacturers say the staff will remove any creature that comes in
Floyd | contact with the orb. Inside the orb you can see the goblin sidekick.
Floyd | He is now tiny and unmoving.
Floyd | A fat fish. Its eyes are white and have no pupils.
Floyd | A bottle of the dreaded Dante Tomato Sauce, Triple-Extra Spicy.
Floyd | Something is written on it. It is open.
Floyd | A Huxoflux & Son healing gun. You tested one of these four years ago,
Floyd | and they are excellent. Just shoot anything that is wounded or sick.
Floyd | A nosehairscrew, a small intricate mechanism with many arms, spikes and
Floyd | pinchers. Part of the Guggensmith Portable Torturing Set that you
Floyd | refused to test some months ago. You are supposed to stuff it up
Floyd | someone's nose, and then twist it to cause horrendous pain.
Floyd | "The Ultimate Creature Manual" by Arthur Hippoman. According to the
Floyd | back it contains information about every single monster in the world,
Floyd | and how to defend yourself against them. It is suspiciously thin.
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | A pair of mirrorshades. You could see yourself in them if you weren't
Floyd | wearing them.
Floyd | On your finger is a Snuffelburg & Co. Type F Magical Ring. It is red
Floyd | and golden. It is supposed to protect you from any magical rays, by
Floyd | moving the effect of the ray away from you and onto the gremlin. That
Floyd | is, if the gremlin is still wearing the smaller, magically connected,
Floyd | ring.
Floyd | A pair of red boxer shorts, decorated with tiny teddy-bears dressed as
Floyd | sailors. They are not something you are supposed to test; they are your
Floyd | own.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "pour bottle on fish"
Floyd | >(the pile of fish bones)
Floyd | Never mind the pile of fish bones.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "pour bottle on sluggish fish"
Floyd | >You pour some tomato sauce on the sluggish fish.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "try pour bottle on sluggish fish"
inky says, "bah"
DavidW says, "hm. I don't remember yet how to deal with the golem, but you should be able to get the knife."
DavidW says, "er yet know"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Tremendous Cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the
Floyd | south.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | A hippoman, half man, half hippo, stands knitting something yellow. He
Floyd | is fat, purple and has two very thick legs. He is wearing your helmet.
Floyd | A young angry-looking woman stands holding a large placard saying "Save
Floyd | the braineating parasite worm!" She is clearly one of those monster
Floyd | rights activists that have been making your job so much harder lately.
Floyd | The gremlin has climbed quite high up on the wall. He is a small green
Floyd | humanoid creature with pointy ears. He is wearing a tiny ring and is
Floyd | smoking a tiny cigarette.
Floyd | A carrot with tiny wings flies around. Its arms and legs look like
Floyd | those of a human, only much smaller. It has no head or face. A steady
Floyd | shower of shimmering sparks falls from all over its body; each spark
Floyd | disappears before hitting the ground.
Floyd | A large metal chest stands up against a wall. It is open and empty.
Floyd | A large machine is at the back of the cave. Its mechanisms looks very
Floyd | complex. Actually it is very easy to use. You know this because on a
Floyd | previous product-testing mission you came across a machine just like it
Floyd | and spend four hours trying to figure out how it worked. The machine is
Floyd | for sharpening tools and weapons. Just put what you want sharpened into
Floyd | it and wait.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a big tacky holy grail here.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "l"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Tremendous Cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the
Floyd | south.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | A hippoman, half man, half hippo, stands knitting something yellow. He
Floyd | is fat, purple and has two very thick legs. He is wearing your helmet.
Floyd | A young angry-looking woman stands holding a large placard saying "Save
Floyd | the braineating parasite worm!" She is clearly one of those monster
Floyd | rights activists that have been making your job so much harder lately.
Floyd | The gremlin has climbed quite high up on the wall. He is a small green
Floyd | humanoid creature with pointy ears. He is wearing a tiny ring and is
Floyd | smoking a tiny cigarette.
Floyd | A carrot with tiny wings flies around. Its arms and legs look like
Floyd | those of a human, only much smaller. It has no head or face. A steady
Floyd | shower of shimmering sparks falls from all over its body; each spark
Floyd | disappears before hitting the ground.
Floyd | A large metal chest stands up against a wall. It is open and empty.
Floyd | A large machine is at the back of the cave. Its mechanisms looks very
Floyd | complex. Actually it is very easy to use. You know this because on a
Floyd | previous product-testing mission you came across a machine just like it
Floyd | and spend four hours trying to figure out how it worked. The machine is
Floyd | for sharpening tools and weapons. Just put what you want sharpened into
Floyd | it and wait.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a big tacky holy grail here.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "oops too far"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner. A knife is planted
Floyd | in it, hilt up.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit fish with staff"
Floyd | >The fat fish vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin sidekick appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the fat fish is inside the orb now, tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, egt knife"
Floyd | >The game did not understand the order you were trying to give.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, get knife"
Floyd | >"The pedestal is too high, boss, I can't reach the knife."
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit goblin with staff"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick with the staff)
Floyd | The goblin sidekick vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The fat fish appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the goblin sidekick is inside the orb now, tiny and
Floyd | unmoving.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "put fish on pedestal"
Floyd | >You need to be holding the fat fish before you can put it on top of
Floyd | something else.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get fish. put it on pedestal"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd | The knife is in the way.
Floyd |
inky says, "oh pfft"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >20 gold coins
Floyd | A staff (with the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | A fat fish
Floyd | A bottle (open)
Floyd | A healing gun
Floyd | A nosehairscrew
Floyd | A manual
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | Mirrorshades
Floyd | A ring
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get knife"
Floyd | >You pull the knife out of the pedestal. You notice the following
Floyd | things:
Floyd | 1. A mysterious click.
Floyd | 2. That the knife is very dull.
Floyd | 3. A large gap in the cave wall next to you opening up.
Floyd | 4. A metal arm with a round spinning saw-blade emerging from the gap.
Floyd | 5. The top of your head being cut off.
Floyd | 6. The arm retreating.
Floyd | 7. The gap closing.
Floyd | 8. Lots of blood gushing out of your head.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot gun at me"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits you.
Floyd | You don't feel anything. The bleeding doesn't stop!
Floyd |
Floyd | More blood erupts from your head.
Floyd |
inky says, "oh, I see"
inky says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | >Huge cave
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Tremendous Cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the
Floyd | south.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | A hippoman, half man, half hippo, stands knitting something yellow. He
Floyd | is fat, purple and has two very thick legs. He is wearing your helmet.
Floyd | A young angry-looking woman stands holding a large placard saying "Save
Floyd | the braineating parasite worm!" She is clearly one of those monster
Floyd | rights activists that have been making your job so much harder lately.
Floyd | The gremlin has climbed quite high up on the wall. He is a small green
Floyd | humanoid creature with pointy ears. He is wearing a tiny ring and is
Floyd | smoking a tiny cigarette.
Floyd | A carrot with tiny wings flies around. Its arms and legs look like
Floyd | those of a human, only much smaller. It has no head or face. A steady
Floyd | shower of shimmering sparks falls from all over its body; each spark
Floyd | disappears before hitting the ground.
Floyd | A large metal chest stands up against a wall. It is open and empty.
Floyd | A large machine is at the back of the cave. Its mechanisms looks very
Floyd | complex. Actually it is very easy to use. You know this because on a
Floyd | previous product-testing mission you came across a machine just like it
Floyd | and spend four hours trying to figure out how it worked. The machine is
Floyd | for sharpening tools and weapons. Just put what you want sharpened into
Floyd | it and wait.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a big tacky holy grail here.
Floyd |
Floyd | More blood erupts from your head.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot gun at gremlin"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | gremlin. Suddenly a good feeling fills your body. You notice the blood
Floyd | has stopped. You feel your head. It is whole again.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by five points.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "put knife in machine"
Floyd | >Just as you are about to put the knife into the machine, the hippoman
Floyd | approaches you angrily. He lifts his hand as if to hit you, but
Floyd | suddenly stops and yelps. He looks startled for a moment. Then he tries
Floyd | to tear off the helmet, but it is stuck. You put the knife in the
Floyd | machine. The knife slides in until it is completely out of view. The
Floyd | machine beeps.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get knife"
Floyd | >You can't see any such thing.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit machine"
Floyd | >You see no reason to hit that.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine hums.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "wait"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine whistles.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "wait"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine makes a sound like glass breaking.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "wait"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine makes a sound like a cabbage being hit with a sledgehammer.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "wait"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine lets out some steam.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "wait"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine vibrates.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "wait"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine shakes.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "wait"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine moves a couple of inches to the right.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "wait"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine moves a couple of inches to the left.
Floyd |
inky says, "..."
inky says (to Floyd), "wait"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine moves a couple of inches forwards.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "wait"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine moves a couple of inches backwards.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "wait"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine jumps.
Floyd |
Floyd | The gremlin snickers. He is staring at the machine with a mischievous
Floyd | look on his face.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get grail"
Floyd | >As you are about to take it, the hippoman approaches you angrily. He
Floyd | lifts his hand as if to hit you, but suddenly stops and yelps. He looks
Floyd | startled for a moment. Then he tries to tear off the helmet, but it is
Floyd | stuck. You pick up the grail. Suddenly you feel a terrible pain in your
Floyd | hand, and you drop the grail. You hear somebody hissing, and look
Floyd | around. It is the gremlin. He is stabbing his cigarette into his own
Floyd | hand. He is clearly in pain. He removes the cigarette from his hand,
Floyd | and the pain in your hand disappears. He puts the cigarette back in his
Floyd | mouth and laughs at you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine beeps. Suddenly the gremlin jumps down from the wall and
Floyd | into the machine. There come some strange sounds from the machine
Floyd | before the gremlin crawls back out and climbs up the wall. The machine
Floyd | starts shaking like crazy, and suddenly the knife comes shooting out of
Floyd | it. The knife flies straight towards your head! You duck. The dagger
Floyd | hits the wall behind you. You notice it is still dull. Darn gremlin!
Floyd |
inky says, "ok hmm"
inky says (to Floyd), "score"
Floyd | >You have so far scored 48 out of a possible 100, in 522 turns.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "take knife"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
inky says, "there's still the grail, the knife, the diamond"
inky asks, "do we need the grail to sacrifice the fish, maybe?"
djfletch says, "I was thinking the knife to sacrifice the fish"
DavidW says, "hm, no to either."
inky says, "er, right"
inky says, "but hmm"
djfletch says, "anyway we need to saxophone for the fish ritual"
DavidW says, "yes. We need the sax for that."
inky says, "oh yeah, stupid golem"
inky says (to Floyd), "read bottle"
Floyd | >The makers of Dante Tomato Sauce take no responsibility for any throat
Floyd | pain, heartburns, ulcers, ruined tongues or death that may be caused by
Floyd | the sauce.
Floyd |
inky says, "oh, I know"
inky says (to Floyd), "drink bottle" djfletch asks, "what was the other god apart from the cat and the comedy god?"
Floyd | >You eat some sauce. Your throat starts burning, you feel a desperate
Floyd | need for water, you feel hot, your stomach starts bubbling, you turn
Floyd | red, steam shoots out of your ears, your bowels burst and your head
Floyd | explodes.
Floyd |
Floyd |     *** You have gone the way of all flesh. ***
Floyd |
Floyd |
Floyd | In that game you scored 48 out of a possible 100, in 525 turns. You get
Floyd | reincarnated as a gerbil.
Floyd | Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, UNDO your last move or
Floyd | QUIT?
inky says, "aw man"
inky says, "I was hoping it would translate to the gremlin"
inky says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | > Tremendous Cave
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
DavidW says, "The other god was a god of wisdom."
djfletch says, "lemme have a look at those gods again"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a little blood here.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can also see the severed top of your head here.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "take head"
Floyd | >You already have that.
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "take top"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "nice"
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot gun at top" DavidW says, "Waste not, want not."
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun, hits the
Floyd | severed top of your head and disappears.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "wear top"
Floyd | >You are a little unsure exactly how you are going to put that in your
Floyd | head. Maybe you should try eating it.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "eat top"
Floyd | >It is certainly edible, but you feel a little queasy about eating part
Floyd | of yourself, so no.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Bumper cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the west. There is
Floyd | another exit to the northeast. Someone has chiseled gaps into the cave
Floyd | wall, forming a primitive ladder leading up to a hole in the ceiling.
Floyd | A table made from human skulls stands near the northeast exit. On the
Floyd | table stands a shimmering pink translucent cube and a small, rusty,
Floyd | holy grail.
Floyd | A small round stage stands close to the table. It is apparently made
Floyd | from human faces frozen in terrible screams.
Floyd | A small flamingo-headed man sits behind the table in a
Floyd | comfortable-looking armchair covered in obviously fake giraffe fur. He
Floyd | is wearing a jester's suit, including a ridiculous hat with bells on.
Floyd | He is staring at the pink cube.
Floyd | An armadillo-headed woman in a white toga sits next to him on a
Floyd | barstool made from green shimmering flames. She is reading a small
Floyd | yellow book called "Fake Paradoxes in Solipsistic Thinking".
Floyd | A cat-headed man sits next to her on a throne draped in black leather,
Floyd | with numerous spikes sticking out of it. He is tall, fat and dressed in
Floyd | a black leather jacket, black jeans and black leather boots.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a flickering image inside the cube. The flamingo-headed man
Floyd | giggles and says, "Some woman in Singapore just sat on a cactus."
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "laugh at flamingo"
Floyd | >That's not a verb I recognise.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "ne"
Floyd | >As you are about to go, the cat-headed man punches you in the stomach.
Floyd | "I'm not going to let you go there!" he says.
Floyd | "Why not?" you whimper.
Floyd | "Because I don't feel like it!"
Floyd |
inky says, "harsh, man"
inky says (to Floyd), "give bottle to cat"
Floyd | >(the cat-headed man)
Floyd | "That's trash!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "give bottle to comedy"
Floyd | >(the flamingo-headed man)
Floyd | "That's not funny! I don't want it!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "give head to comedy"
Floyd | >(the flamingo-headed man)
Floyd | You can't give away things that are stuck on your body.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "maybe only the cat matters and the other two are just for decoration"
inky says (to Floyd), "give top to comedy"
Floyd | >(the flamingo-headed man)
Floyd | "That's not funny! I don't want it!"
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a flickering image inside the cube. The flamingo-headed man
Floyd | giggles and says, "Some woman in Switzerland just feel down a canyon."
Floyd |
inky says, "could be, could be"
DavidW says (to djfletch), "you wish"
djfletch says, "dammit"
DavidW says, "It's possible, though, that only the cat blocks the ne exit."
inky says, "ok, I dunno"
inky says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >20 gold coins
Floyd | A staff (with the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | A fat fish
Floyd | A knife
Floyd | A bottle (open)
Floyd | A healing gun
Floyd | A nosehairscrew
Floyd | A manual
Floyd | A severed head top
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | Mirrorshades
Floyd | A ring
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "oh! I remember how to get the sax."
inky says (to Floyd), "give nosehairscrew to cat"
Floyd | >(the cat-headed man)
Floyd | "That's trash!"
Floyd |
djfletch asks, "if we torture ourselves does it hurt the gremlin?"
DavidW says (to dj), "yup"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "torture me with nosehairscrew"
Floyd | >To torture someone with a nosehairscrew, the nosehairscrew must first
Floyd | be in that someone's nose.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a flickering image inside the cube. The flamingo-headed man
Floyd | giggles and says, "Some guy in Norway just fell into a barrel of fish."
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "put screw in nose"
Floyd | >You put the nosehairscrew into your nose.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "turn screw"
Floyd | >You put your hand on the nosehairscrew, but hesitate. The pain is
Floyd | going to be horrible. But then you remember what the Hoverist taught
Floyd | you. You twist the screw. The pain is indescribable so I won't try. You
Floyd | collapse.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a flickering image inside the cube. The flamingo-headed man
Floyd | giggles and says, "Some guy in Singapore just fell down a hole."
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >You can't do anything. You are paralyzed with pain.
Floyd |
Floyd | The pain subsides. You get up.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a little blood here.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Tremendous Cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the
Floyd | south.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | A hippoman, half man, half hippo, stands knitting something yellow. He
Floyd | is fat, purple and has two very thick legs. He is wearing your helmet.
Floyd | A young angry-looking woman stands holding a large placard saying "Save
Floyd | the braineating parasite worm!" She is clearly one of those monster
Floyd | rights activists that have been making your job so much harder lately.
Floyd | The gremlin has climbed quite high up on the wall. He is a small green
Floyd | humanoid creature with pointy ears. He is wearing a tiny ring and is
Floyd | smoking a tiny cigarette.
Floyd | A carrot with tiny wings flies around. Its arms and legs look like
Floyd | those of a human, only much smaller. It has no head or face. A steady
Floyd | shower of shimmering sparks falls from all over its body; each spark
Floyd | disappears before hitting the ground.
Floyd | A large metal chest stands up against a wall. It is open and empty.
Floyd | A large machine is at the back of the cave. Its mechanisms looks very
Floyd | complex. Actually it is very easy to use. You know this because on a
Floyd | previous product-testing mission you came across a machine just like it
Floyd | and spend four hours trying to figure out how it worked. The machine is
Floyd | for sharpening tools and weapons. Just put what you want sharpened into
Floyd | it and wait.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a little blood here.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a big tacky holy grail here.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "put screw in nose"
Floyd | >The nosehairscrew is already here.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "turn screw"
Floyd | >You put your hand on the nosehairscrew, but hesitate. The pain is
Floyd | going to be horrible. But then you remember what the Hoverist taught
Floyd | you. You twist the screw. The pain is indescribable so I won't try. You
Floyd | collapse. The gremlin screams and falls down from the wall.
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
inky says (to Floyd), "grab gremlin"
Floyd | >That's not a verb I recognise.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get gremlin"
Floyd | >You can't do anything. You are paralyzed with pain.
Floyd |
Floyd | The pain subsides. You get up. The gremlin curses and scuttles up the
Floyd | wall.
Floyd |
inky says, "ok, I guess we have to repeat the whole machine sequence"
DavidW says, "yes"
inky says (to Floyd), "put knife in machine"
Floyd | >Just as you are about to put the knife into the machine, the hippoman
Floyd | approaches you angrily. He lifts his hand as if to hit you, but
Floyd | suddenly stops and yelps. He looks startled for a moment. Then he tries
Floyd | to tear off the helmet, but it is stuck. You put the knife in the
Floyd | machine. The knife slides in until it is completely out of view. The
Floyd | machine beeps.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "z.z.z.z"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine hums.
Floyd | Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine whistles.
Floyd | Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine makes a sound like glass breaking.
Floyd | Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine makes a sound like a cabbage being hit with a sledgehammer.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "z.z.z"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine lets out some steam.
Floyd | Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine vibrates.
Floyd | Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine shakes.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "z.z"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine moves a couple of inches to the right.
Floyd | Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine moves a couple of inches to the left.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "z.z."
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine moves a couple of inches forwards.
Floyd | Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine moves a couple of inches backwards.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "z"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine jumps.
Floyd |
Floyd | The gremlin snickers. He is staring at the machine with a mischievous
Floyd | look on his face.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "now!"
inky says (to Floyd), "turn screw"
Floyd | >You put your hand on the nosehairscrew, but hesitate. The pain is
Floyd | going to be horrible. But then you remember what the Hoverist taught
Floyd | you. You twist the screw. The pain is indescribable so I won't try. You
Floyd | collapse. The gremlin screams and falls down from the wall.
Floyd |
Floyd | The machine beeps. The dagger slides out on the floor. It looks nice
Floyd | and sharp.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by five points.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get knife"
Floyd | >You can't do anything. You are paralyzed with pain.
Floyd |
Floyd | The pain subsides. You get up. The gremlin curses and scuttles up the
Floyd | wall.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get knife"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "cf13"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
DavidW asks, "Now... do you now know what the knife is for?"
inky says, "not the slightest"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "take grail" inky says, "I guess we can, you know, stab stuff"
Floyd | >As you are about to take it, the hippoman approaches you angrily. He
Floyd | lifts his hand as if to hit you, but suddenly stops and yelps. He looks
Floyd | startled for a moment. Then he tries to tear off the helmet, but it is
Floyd | stuck. You pick up the grail. Suddenly you feel a terrible pain in your
Floyd | hand, and you drop the grail. You hear somebody hissing, and look
Floyd | around. It is the gremlin. He is stabbing his cigarette into his own
Floyd | hand. He is clearly in pain. He removes the cigarette from his hand,
Floyd | and the pain in your hand disappears. He puts the cigarette back in his
Floyd | mouth and laughs at you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "throw knife at gremlin"
Floyd | >The gremlin quickly climbs out of the way of the knife which smashes
Floyd | into the wall, and falls to the ground. The gremlin giggles.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | >Tremendous Cave
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "stab hand"
Floyd | >(with the big tacky holy grail)
Floyd | That is not suitable as a hitting weapon.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "stab hand with knife"
Floyd | >That seems a tad drastic. Try cutting off just the finger.
Floyd |
inky says, "man dang"
inky says (to Floyd), "cut off finger"
Floyd | >(with the big tacky holy grail)
Floyd | That is not a proper tool for cutting.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "cut off finger with knife"
Floyd | >You begin to move the knife towards the finger with the ring on, then
Floyd | hesitate. The pain would just be too much, you think. Then you remember
Floyd | what the Hoverist taught you. You cut off the finger. Blood starts
Floyd | gushing out of the wound. You begin to feel weak.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by five points.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot gremlin with gun"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | gremlin. The gremlin grins.
Floyd |
Floyd | The blood keeps pouring out of your finger. You are feeling really bad.
Floyd | You think you will die unless you do something right now.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot gremlin with gun"
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | gremlin. The gremlin grins.
Floyd |
Floyd | The blood loss gets too big.
Floyd |
Floyd |     *** You are vulture lunch. ***
Floyd |
Floyd |
Floyd | In that game you scored 58 out of a possible 100, in 569 turns. You get
Floyd | reincarnated as a duck-billed platypus.
Floyd | Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, UNDO your last move or
Floyd | QUIT?
DavidW says, "no!"
djfletch says, "no shoot us now"
inky says, "oh, right"
inky says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | > Tremendous Cave
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot me with gun" DavidW says, "Once the ring is off we shoot US."
Floyd | >You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits you.
Floyd | Suddenly a good feeling fills your body. A new finger grows out where
Floyd | the old one was. The bleeding stops.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
inky says, "right, sorry, I didn't realize that was what we were doing"
inky says (to Floyd), "get finger"
Floyd | >You already have that.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get grail"
Floyd | >As you are about to take it, the hippoman approaches you angrily. He
Floyd | lifts his hand as if to hit you, but suddenly stops and yelps. He looks
Floyd | startled for a moment. Then he tries to tear off the helmet, but it is
Floyd | stuck. You pick up the grail.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "cf14"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "look"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Tremendous Cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the
Floyd | south.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | A hippoman, half man, half hippo, stands knitting something yellow. He
Floyd | is fat, purple and has two very thick legs. He is wearing your helmet.
Floyd | A young angry-looking woman stands holding a large placard saying "Save
Floyd | the braineating parasite worm!" She is clearly one of those monster
Floyd | rights activists that have been making your job so much harder lately.
Floyd | The gremlin has climbed quite high up on the wall. He is a small green
Floyd | humanoid creature with pointy ears. He is wearing a tiny ring and is
Floyd | smoking a tiny cigarette.
Floyd | A carrot with tiny wings flies around. Its arms and legs look like
Floyd | those of a human, only much smaller. It has no head or face. A steady
Floyd | shower of shimmering sparks falls from all over its body; each spark
Floyd | disappears before hitting the ground.
Floyd | A large metal chest stands up against a wall. It is open and empty.
Floyd | A large machine is at the back of the cave. Its mechanisms looks very
Floyd | complex. Actually it is very easy to use. You know this because on a
Floyd | previous product-testing mission you came across a machine just like it
Floyd | and spend four hours trying to figure out how it worked. The machine is
Floyd | for sharpening tools and weapons. Just put what you want sharpened into
Floyd | it and wait.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is quite a lot of blood here.
Floyd |
Floyd | A severed finger lies here. On it is a Snuffelburg & Co. Type F Magical
Floyd | Ring. The ring is red and golden. It was supposed to protect you from
Floyd | any magical rays, by moving the effect of the ray away from you and
Floyd | onto the gremlin.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get severed finger"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
djfletch asks, "one miserable point for a fricking grail?"
inky says, "it's not a very good grail"
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a little blood here.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Bumper cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the west. There is
Floyd | another exit to the northeast. Someone has chiseled gaps into the cave
Floyd | wall, forming a primitive ladder leading up to a hole in the ceiling.
Floyd | A table made from human skulls stands near the northeast exit. On the
Floyd | table stands a shimmering pink translucent cube and a small, rusty,
Floyd | holy grail.
Floyd | A small round stage stands close to the table. It is apparently made
Floyd | from human faces frozen in terrible screams.
Floyd | A small flamingo-headed man sits behind the table in a
Floyd | comfortable-looking armchair covered in obviously fake giraffe fur. He
Floyd | is wearing a jester's suit, including a ridiculous hat with bells on.
Floyd | He is staring at the pink cube.
Floyd | An armadillo-headed woman in a white toga sits next to him on a
Floyd | barstool made from green shimmering flames. She is reading a huge black
Floyd | book called "Quantum Physics in Infinitely Dimensional Realities".
Floyd | A cat-headed man sits next to her on a throne draped in black leather,
Floyd | with numerous spikes sticking out of it. He is tall, fat and dressed in
Floyd | a black leather jacket, black jeans and black leather boots.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get grail"
Floyd | >(the big tacky holy grail)
Floyd | You already have that.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get rusty grail"
Floyd | >You try to take the grail, but the flamingo-headed man notices it. He
Floyd | sticks his hands inside his chest and pulls out a huge fish, holding it
Floyd | around its tail. The fish is much larger than the man's chest, and
Floyd | almost larger than the man. The man slaps you in the face with the
Floyd | fish. Then, giggling, he puts it back in his chest. "It's my grail," he
Floyd | says.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "give tacky grail to flamingo"
Floyd | >(the flamingo-headed man)
Floyd | "No thanks, I already have a grail."
Floyd |
djfletch says, "we can try selling it"
inky says (to Floyd), "put tacky grail on table"
Floyd | >Just as you are about to put it on the table, the skulls start
Floyd | screaming, and you quickly step back.
Floyd |
inky says, "ah, true"
inky says (to Floyd), "w.s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a little blood here.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the north. There is
Floyd | also an exit to the south.
Floyd | A red automat, hundred of meters tall, stands in the middle of the
Floyd | cave. Despite the insane magnitude of the machine, its money-slot and
Floyd | buttons are normal-sized and placed at normal height. The
Floyd | merchandise-slot is also close to the floor, but huge enough to hold a
Floyd | horse. You have come across these automats before. Several companies
Floyd | have recently begun placing them in dangerous places, for adventurers
Floyd | who need equipment. They are easy to use; just buy something. Something
Floyd | is written on the automat next to the buttons.
Floyd | A stone altar stands up against a wall. It is low, shadowy,
Floyd | bloodstained and has runes written on it. Next to it is a huge pile of
Floyd | fish bones.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the altar you can see:
Floyd | A sluggish fish. Its eyes are white and have no pupils. It is crawling
Floyd | around. It is covered in tomato sauce.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the south, or you can go
Floyd | further into the mountain to the north.
Floyd | A burly barbarian is leaning against a wall, playing with a yo-yo, a
Floyd | grim expression on his face. A long sabre is in his belt.
Floyd | A tough-looking dwarf, wearing chain mail and a helmet, is sitting on
Floyd | the floor. With one hand he is holding an axe almost as big as himself.
Floyd | In the other he is holding a wooden paddle with a small ball attached
Floyd | with a rubber string. He keeps hitting the ball with the paddle.
Floyd | A muscular white horse and a mangy donkey stand here.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "sell grail"
Floyd | >You have to specify whom you want to give to.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "sell grail to barbarian"
Floyd | >(the barbarian)
Floyd | The barbarian smiles and says, "That is a good treasure." He attaches
Floyd | the grail to his belt. Then he gives you five gold coins. Then he jumps
Floyd | forwards, summersaults through the air, and lands on the back of his
Floyd | horse. It storms out to the south.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
DavidW says, "ha woodle paddle"
DavidW says, "er wooden"
inky says (to Floyd), "l"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the south, or you can go
Floyd | further into the mountain to the north.
Floyd | A tough-looking dwarf, wearing chain mail and a helmet, is sitting on
Floyd | the floor. With one hand he is holding an axe almost as big as himself.
Floyd | In the other he is holding a wooden paddle with a small ball attached
Floyd | with a rubber string. He keeps hitting the ball with the paddle.
Floyd | A mangy donkey stands here.
Floyd |
inky asks, "wait, the dwarf is still hanging out?"
DavidW says, "we now have 25 gp"
inky says, "oh, right"
inky says, "I guess when we have 30 we put the diamond in the wheelbarrow"
DavidW says, "Dwarf wants a grail too."
DavidW says (to inky), "mmhm"
DavidW says, "We can get the sax."
djfletch says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the north. There is
Floyd | also an exit to the south.
Floyd | A red automat, hundred of meters tall, stands in the middle of the
Floyd | cave. Despite the insane magnitude of the machine, its money-slot and
Floyd | buttons are normal-sized and placed at normal height. The
Floyd | merchandise-slot is also close to the floor, but huge enough to hold a
Floyd | horse. You have come across these automats before. Several companies
Floyd | have recently begun placing them in dangerous places, for adventurers
Floyd | who need equipment. They are easy to use; just buy something. Something
Floyd | is written on the automat next to the buttons.
Floyd | A stone altar stands up against a wall. It is low, shadowy,
Floyd | bloodstained and has runes written on it. Next to it is a huge pile of
Floyd | fish bones.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the altar you can see:
Floyd | A sluggish fish. Its eyes are white and have no pupils. It is crawling
Floyd | around. It is covered in tomato sauce.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a little blood here.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Prodigious and very hot cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the east.
Floyd | It is terribly hot here. The intolerable temperature is almost
Floyd | certainly caused by the red-hot stone oven standing in a corner.
Floyd | A stone table stands in the middle of the cave. Round it stands a stone
Floyd | throne with an old troll, a stone chair with a tall troll, a stone
Floyd | stool with a short troll, and a large stone. The trolls look a bit like
Floyd | humans made of stone, though with no necks, bigger jaws, smaller eyes
Floyd | and huge arms and hands. They are playing some kind of card game.
Floyd | A golem, a man crudely made from stone, is standing here unmoving. Some
Floyd | runes have been chiseled into his chest.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a stone saxophone here.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "stab golem with knife"
Floyd | >(the golem with the knife)
Floyd | The knife makes no damage at all to the stone man.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get sax"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "play sax"
Floyd | >The unearthly blare spewing forth from the instrument is hideous
Floyd | beyond comprehension. Your bones shiver from the obvious evil infusing
Floyd | every resonance of the soul-quenching noise and you feel like the
Floyd | eldritch sounds tear your mind apart and play ping-pong with your
Floyd | sanity. You were never a big fan of saxophone music.
Floyd |
schep arrives, full of neither funk nor fun.
inky says (to Floyd), "play sax"
Floyd | >The unearthly blare spewing forth from the instrument is hideous
Floyd | beyond comprehension. Your bones shiver from the obvious evil infusing
Floyd | every resonance of the soul-quenching noise and you feel like the
Floyd | eldritch sounds tear your mind apart and play ping-pong with your
Floyd | sanity. You were never a big fan of saxophone music.
Floyd |
dsimon says, "heh"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >As you are about to leave, the golem suddenly comes to life. It easily
Floyd | yanks the saxophone from your arms and puts it on the cave floor. Then
Floyd | it goes back to standing still, exactly in the same position as before.
Floyd | One of the trolls says, "Ur, oh yeah, that golem was sat there to guard
Floyd | the saxophone. That sax is some kind of holy relic or something."
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >25 gold coins
Floyd | A staff (with the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | A fat fish
Floyd | A knife (sharpened)
Floyd | A bottle (open)
Floyd | A healing gun
Floyd | A manual
Floyd | A severed finger (with a ring)
Floyd | A severed head top
Floyd | A nosehairscrew (in your nose)
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | Mirrorshades
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read runes"
Floyd | >They are very old runes and the only one you understand means
Floyd | "saxophone".
Floyd |
inky says, "hmm"
inky asks, "will the goblin understand them?"
DavidW says, "no."
DavidW says, "we asked"
dsimon says (to Floyd), "erase runes"
Floyd | >Your attempts at erasing the runes fail, the stone is too hard. Nice
Floyd | try though.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "yay"
inky asks, "and not just with his eyesight?"
inky says (to Floyd), "point healing gun at golem"
Floyd | >(the golem)
Floyd | Nah, aiming is for wimps.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "different runes"
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot healing gun at golem"
Floyd | >(the golem)
Floyd | You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | golem.
Floyd |
newbold arrives, full of neither funk nor fun.
dsimon says (to Floyd), "hit goblin with fish"
Floyd | >There is not much you can do to stuff that is inside the orb.
Floyd |
Ellison arrives, ready to play with the toys.
dsimon says (to Floyd), "hit golem with fish"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "give finger to golem"
Floyd | >(the golem with the fat fish)
Floyd | That is not suitable as a hitting weapon.
Floyd |
Floyd | >(the golem)
Floyd | You can't give away things that are stuck on your body.
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Dj, heh"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "give head top to golem"
Floyd | >(the golem)
Floyd | The golem does not respond to your offer.
Floyd |
djfletch asks, "have we looked up the golem?"
inky says (to Floyd), "give severed finger to golem"
Floyd | >(the golem)
Floyd | The golem does not respond to your offer.
Floyd |
newbold heads home. DavidW says, "no"
inky says, "good idea"
inky says (to Floyd), "read manual"
Floyd | >You must say what page to read, like "read page 1" or "read 1"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read page 2"
Floyd | >So, you have spotted a monster. How many legs does it have?
Floyd | None: read page 3
Floyd | One: read page 35
Floyd | Two: read page 36
Floyd | Three: read page 62
Floyd | Four: read page 63
Floyd | Six: read page 86
Floyd | Eight: read page 87
Floyd | Forty eight billion and five: read page 90
Floyd | It varies: read page 91
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read page 36"
Floyd | >Does it have wings?
Floyd | Yes: read page 37
Floyd | No: read page 45
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read page 46"
Floyd | >What does its head look like?
Floyd | Like a human head: 47
Floyd | Like an animal head: read page 52
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read page 45"
Floyd | >What does the skin on its body look like?
Floyd | Like human skin: read page 46
Floyd | Green: read page 53
Floyd | Purple: read page 58
Floyd | Like rock: read page 59
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read page 59"
Floyd | >Does it have runes carved into its breast?
Floyd | Yes: read 60
Floyd | No: read 61
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read page 60"
Floyd | >It is a Golem; an artificial creature made of rock and magic, forced
Floyd | to serve out the commands carved into its chest. To destroy it, simply
Floyd | buy and read my previous book "How to Destroy a Golem".
Floyd |
djfletch says, "this manual should be a feelie for this game"
inky says, "ha ha jerk"
schep says (to Floyd), "read page 61"
Floyd | >It is a Troll. They are extinct so don't worry about them.
Floyd |
Ellison says, "that classification manual is a nice idea"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "write on golem"
Floyd | >That's not a verb I recognise.
Floyd |
inky says, "hmm"
inky says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >25 gold coins
Floyd | A staff (with the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | A fat fish
Floyd | A knife (sharpened)
Floyd | A bottle (open)
Floyd | A healing gun
Floyd | A manual
Floyd | A severed finger (with a ring)
Floyd | A severed head top
Floyd | A nosehairscrew (in your nose)
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | Mirrorshades
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "talk to golem"
Floyd | >(the golem)
Floyd | "Who made you?" you ask, but the golem does not respond.
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "give bottle to golem"
Floyd | >(the golem)
Floyd | The golem does not respond to your offer.
Floyd |
inky says, "I'm not really sure where to go with this guy"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "pour bottle on golem"
Floyd | >(the golem)
Floyd | Hold on! You have to catch a creature before you can begin preparations
Floyd | for eating it!
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "pour bottle on golem"
Floyd | >(the golem)
Floyd | Hold on! You have to catch a creature before you can begin preparations
Floyd | for eating it!
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
Ellison says, "hee"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "put shades on golem"
Floyd | >(the golem)
Floyd | Putting things on the golem would achieve nothing.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "well, this can be solved with a trick."
inky says (to Floyd), "get sax"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
inky says, "but what *sort* of trick"
schep asks, "you can't erase all the runes, but can you change, cover, or replace the rune that says 'saxophone'?"
inky says (to Floyd), "hit me with staff"
Floyd | >Suddenly everything looks slightly different.
Floyd |
Floyd | Prodigious and very hot cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the east.
Floyd | It is terribly hot here. The intolerable temperature is almost
Floyd | certainly caused by the red-hot stone oven standing in a corner.
Floyd | A stone table stands in the middle of the cave. Round it stands a stone
Floyd | throne with an old troll, a stone chair with a tall troll, a stone
Floyd | stool with a short troll, and a large stone. The trolls look a bit like
Floyd | humans made of stone, though with no necks, bigger jaws, smaller eyes
Floyd | and huge arms and hands. They are playing some kind of card game.
Floyd | A golem, a man crudely made from stone, is standing here unmoving. Some
Floyd | runes have been chiseled into his chest.
Floyd |
Floyd | A mail-ordered short metal staff with a clear orb on the end lies here.
Floyd | Its manufacturers say the staff will remove any creature that comes in
Floyd | contact with the orb. Inside the orb you can see the goblin sidekick.
Floyd | He is now tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
inky says, "oh well"
DavidW says, "The runes and golem can't be altered."
inky asks, "the goblin can't carry stuff for us, can it?"
djfletch says, "yes it can"
DavidW says, "certainly he can."
inky says (to Floyd), "hit fish with staff"
Floyd | >First taking the staff.
Floyd | Taken.
Floyd | The fat fish vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin sidekick appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the fat fish is inside the orb now, tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin says, "Gee boss, I am kind of confused about what just
Floyd | happened. But I saw you had become this tiny frozen figure inside the
Floyd | orb. I figured I had to try and rescue you, so I touched the orb. I
Floyd | don't know exactly what happened then, but now here you are."
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get sax"
Floyd | >You already have that.
Floyd |
Floyd | "Oh no, my eyesight is back to normal!" says the goblin.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "give sax to goblin"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | You give the stone saxophone to the goblin.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit goblin with staff"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick with the staff)
Floyd | The goblin sidekick vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The fat fish appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the goblin sidekick is inside the orb now, tiny and
Floyd | unmoving.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a little blood here.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit fish with staff"
Floyd | >You can't see any such thing.
Floyd |
DavidW asks, "don't you want the fish?"
inky says, "oops yes"
DavidW says, "you left it in the other room"
inky says (to Floyd), "w. get fish. e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Prodigious and very hot cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the east.
Floyd | It is terribly hot here. The intolerable temperature is almost
Floyd | certainly caused by the red-hot stone oven standing in a corner.
Floyd | A stone table stands in the middle of the cave. Round it stands a stone
Floyd | throne with an old troll, a stone chair with a tall troll, a stone
Floyd | stool with a short troll, and a large stone. The trolls look a bit like
Floyd | humans made of stone, though with no necks, bigger jaws, smaller eyes
Floyd | and huge arms and hands. They are playing some kind of card game.
Floyd | A golem, a man crudely made from stone, is standing here unmoving. Some
Floyd | runes have been chiseled into his chest.
Floyd |
Floyd | A fat fish crawls around here. Its eyes are white and have no pupils.
Floyd | Taken.
Floyd |
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a little blood here.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit fish with staff"
Floyd | >The fat fish vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin sidekick appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the fat fish is inside the orb now, tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by five points.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, give sax to me"
Floyd | >The goblin gives the stone saxophone to you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the north. There is
Floyd | also an exit to the south.
Floyd | A red automat, hundred of meters tall, stands in the middle of the
Floyd | cave. Despite the insane magnitude of the machine, its money-slot and
Floyd | buttons are normal-sized and placed at normal height. The
Floyd | merchandise-slot is also close to the floor, but huge enough to hold a
Floyd | horse. You have come across these automats before. Several companies
Floyd | have recently begun placing them in dangerous places, for adventurers
Floyd | who need equipment. They are easy to use; just buy something. Something
Floyd | is written on the automat next to the buttons.
Floyd | A stone altar stands up against a wall. It is low, shadowy,
Floyd | bloodstained and has runes written on it. Next to it is a huge pile of
Floyd | fish bones.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the altar you can see:
Floyd | A sluggish fish. Its eyes are white and have no pupils. It is crawling
Floyd | around. It is covered in tomato sauce.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "play sax"
Floyd | >The unearthly blare spewing forth from the instrument is hideous
Floyd | beyond comprehension. Your bones shiver from the obvious evil infusing
Floyd | every resonance of the soul-quenching noise and you feel like the
Floyd | eldritch sounds tear your mind apart and play ping-pong with your
Floyd | sanity. You were never a big fan of saxophone music.
Floyd |
Floyd | A blue eerie light surrounds the altar. The sluggish fish fades away.
Floyd | Suddenly you hear a terrible scream from the north:
Floyd | "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" The scream stops. Shortly after the altar
Floyd | suddenly crumbles to dust.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by three points.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a little blood here.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Bumper cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the west. There is
Floyd | another exit to the northeast. Someone has chiseled gaps into the cave
Floyd | wall, forming a primitive ladder leading up to a hole in the ceiling.
Floyd | A table made from human skulls stands near the northeast exit. On the
Floyd | table stands a shimmering pink translucent cube and a small, rusty,
Floyd | holy grail.
Floyd | A small round stage stands close to the table. It is apparently made
Floyd | from human faces frozen in terrible screams.
Floyd | A small flamingo-headed man sits behind the table in a
Floyd | comfortable-looking armchair covered in obviously fake giraffe fur. He
Floyd | is wearing a jester's suit, including a ridiculous hat with bells on.
Floyd | He is staring at the pink cube.
Floyd | An armadillo-headed woman in a white toga sits next to him on a
Floyd | barstool made from green shimmering flames. She is reading a
Floyd | heavy-looking green book called "Strategies in Controlling the
Floyd | Subconscious".
Floyd | A big pile of smoking ashes lies next to her.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | "Where on earth can the cat-headed man have gone?" you think.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "talk to comedy"
Floyd | >(the flamingo-headed man)
Floyd | "What is the weird stage for?" you ask.
Floyd | "It's mine. It's my altar. Where my followers stand when they worship
Floyd | me."
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a flickering image inside the cube. The flamingo-headed man
Floyd | giggles and says, "Some woman in Canada just got attacked by a
Floyd | woodpecker."
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "cf15"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "talk to woman"
Floyd | >(the armadillo-headed woman)
Floyd | "Is it a good book?" you ask.
Floyd | The woman frowns and says: "No. Can you believe the writer overlooked
Floyd | the implications of the pseudo-imaginary deterioration of quasi-Jungian
Floyd | id complexity during non-elusive, non-reflective dreams?" She laughs
Floyd | joylessly.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "ne"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gargantuan cave
Floyd | This cave's only exit is to the southwest.
Floyd | A large wooden crank sticks out from a wall.
Floyd | A lizard as long as your arm is clutched to the wall, high above the
Floyd | crank, its head facing downwards. It has huge bulging eyes. It is red,
Floyd | orange, yellow, blue, purple, pink, brown, gray and black.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky asks, "I don't really understand what happened -- did he eat the hot sauce, maybe?"
DavidW says, "yes. The cat god ate the hot sauced fish and was destroyed."
inky says, "ah good"
djfletch says, "oh I see"
inky says (to Floyd), "turn crank"
Floyd | >As you approach the crank, the lizard shoots a fireball downwards from
Floyd | its mouth. You jump back, unhurt.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "The golem, should you want to check, is also gone."
inky says, "dang"
inky says, "hunh, interesting"
inky says (to Floyd), "read 2"
Floyd | >So, you have spotted a monster. How many legs does it have?
Floyd | None: read page 3
Floyd | One: read page 35
Floyd | Two: read page 36
Floyd | Three: read page 62
Floyd | Four: read page 63
Floyd | Six: read page 86
Floyd | Eight: read page 87
Floyd | Forty eight billion and five: read page 90
Floyd | It varies: read page 91
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 63"
Floyd | >Does it have hooves?
Floyd | Yes: read page 64
Floyd | No: read page 72
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 72"
Floyd | >Is it hairy?
Floyd | Yes: read page 73
Floyd | No: read page 79
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 79"
Floyd | >Does it have large bulging eyes?
Floyd | No: read page 80
Floyd | Yes: read page 81
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 81"
Floyd | >Is it green?
Floyd | No: read page 82
Floyd | Yes: read page 83
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 82"
Floyd | >It is a Shameleon. This lizard has developed a special kind of
Floyd | camouflage: it will taste exactly the same as whatever surface it is
Floyd | lying on. The Shameleon can breathe fire. Its colorful body is easy to
Floyd | spot, so just stay out of its range and you'll be safe.
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
inky says (to Floyd), "look"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gargantuan cave
Floyd | This cave's only exit is to the southwest.
Floyd | A large wooden crank sticks out from a wall.
Floyd | A lizard as long as your arm is clutched to the wall, high above the
Floyd | crank, its head facing downwards. It has huge bulging eyes. It is red,
Floyd | orange, yellow, blue, purple, pink, brown, gray and black.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see the goblin sidekick here.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "lick wall"
Floyd | >It taste awful.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "lick lizard"
Floyd | >The lizard is too high up.
Floyd |
Ellison says, "hee"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "goblin, turn crank"
Floyd | >The goblin approaches the crank. The lizard shoots out a fireball. The
Floyd | goblin runs and hides behind you.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "hit lizard with staff"
Floyd | >The lizard is too high up.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "throw staff at lizard"
Floyd | >The staff smashes into the lizard.
Floyd |
Floyd | The lizard vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The fat fish appears hovering in the air, but immediately falls down.
Floyd |
Floyd | The staff falls on the ground.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the lizard is inside the orb now, tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "take staff"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "take fish"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
inky says, "ah, nice"
inky says (to Floyd), "turn crank"
Floyd | >You turn the crank. The cave rumbles and part of the cave-wall slides
Floyd | away, revealing an exit to the northeast.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "ne"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Commodious cave (on the west ledge)
Floyd | A wide abyss fills almost the entire floor in this cave, with only two
Floyd | stone ledges to stand on. Both ledges go from the south end to the
Floyd | north end of the cave. One ledge comes out from the west wall, the
Floyd | other from the east wall.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. Another exit,
Floyd | reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast.
Floyd | A large button sticks up from the middle of the east ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "The staff is damn handy."
inky says, "man, how can this game keep going and going"
inky says (to Floyd), "score"
Floyd | >You have so far scored 70 out of a possible 100, in 648 turns.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "push button"
Floyd | >You can't do that from the west ledge.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "jump"
Floyd | >The abyss is too wide to jump across.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, push button"
Floyd | >"I can't reach that from this ledge, boss!"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "is"
schep says (to Floyd), "goblin, jump"
Floyd | >25 gold coins
Floyd | A staff (with the lizard)
Floyd | A fat fish
Floyd | A saxophone
Floyd | A knife (sharpened)
Floyd | A bottle (open)
Floyd | A healing gun
Floyd | A manual
Floyd | A severed finger (with a ring)
Floyd | A severed head top
Floyd | A nosehairscrew (in your nose)
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | Mirrorshades
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
Floyd | >"But boss, this abyss is too wide to jump across."
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "throw manual at button"
Floyd | >You throw the Creature Manual at the button. There is a click, and a
Floyd | narrow stone bridge shoots out from the west wall, just below the west
Floyd | ledge. The bridge extends until it meets the east wall, just below the
Floyd | east ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >You walk across the bridge.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin runs across the bridge to the east ledge.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get manual"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "l"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Commodious cave (on the east ledge)
Floyd | A wide abyss fills almost the entire floor in this cave, with only two
Floyd | stone ledges to stand on. Both ledges go from the south end to the
Floyd | north end of the cave. One ledge comes out from the west wall, the
Floyd | other from the east wall.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. Another exit,
Floyd | reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast.
Floyd | A large button sticks up from the middle of the east ledge.
Floyd | A narrow stone bridge goes from the east side of the room to the west,
Floyd | just below the ledges.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the east ledge you can see the goblin sidekick.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "ne"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Over-sized cave (on the west ledge)
Floyd | This cave is almost identical to the previous, with an abyss, a west
Floyd | ledge and an east ledge.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. Another exit,
Floyd | reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast.
Floyd | A small catapult, about as tall as you, is standing on the west ledge,
Floyd | aimed towards the east ledge. You have come across this type of
Floyd | catapult before. They are very easy to use, just put something in it,
Floyd | and it will be shot out automatically before the catapult adjusts
Floyd | itself so that it is ready to shoot again. These catapults are no
Floyd | longer being sold due to the large number of accidents they have
Floyd | caused.
Floyd | A large wooden crank sticks out from the east wall above the ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "turn crank"
Floyd | >You can't do that from the west ledge.
Floyd |
schep says (to Floyd), "goblin, enter catapult"
Floyd | >The goblin reluctantly climbs into the catapult. He says, "Are you
Floyd | sure this is saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaafe?" before smashing into the east wall.
Floyd | He slides down on the east ledge, as the catapult readjusts itself so
Floyd | that it is ready to shoot again.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, turn crank"
Floyd | >The goblin turns the crank. There is a click, and a narrow stone
Floyd | bridge shoots out from the west wall, just below the west ledge. The
Floyd | bridge extends until it meets the east wall, just below the east ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin runs across the bridge to the west ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
inky says, "hee hee"
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >You walk across the bridge.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin runs across the bridge to the east ledge.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "ne"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Cavernous cave (on the west ledge)
Floyd | Once again it's an abyss, a west ledge and an east ledge.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. A metal door,
Floyd | reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast.
Floyd | A large wooden crank sticks out from the east wall above the ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "x crank"
Floyd | >In this game you can't examine things. Instead use either "look" to
Floyd | see descriptions of the things in the room you are in, or "inventory"
Floyd | to see descriptions of what you are carrying. You also can't use "look
Floyd | inside", "look under", "look behind", "look <direction>" or "search".
Floyd | But you can use "read".
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, turn crank"
Floyd | >"I can't reach that from this ledge."
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "jump"
Floyd | >The abyss is too wide to jump across.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "throw manual at crank"
Floyd | >You throw the Creature Manual. It hits the crank before falling on the
Floyd | east ledge.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | >Cavernous cave
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
schep says, "I suspect the staff and orb, but haven't seen enough of exactly what they do"
inky says, "the staff (which has the orb on it) sucks a monster into it when you hit them with it"
inky says, "and ejects the previous occupant"
djfletch asks, "might work - throw the staff over with the goblin, then throw the fish at the staff?"
inky says, "sounds good"
djfletch says, "but save first"
inky says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
inky says (to Floyd), "cf16"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit goblin with staff"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick with the staff)
Floyd | The goblin sidekick vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The lizard appears on the west ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the goblin sidekick is inside the orb now, tiny and
Floyd | unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | The lizard crawls off in the direction you found it.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "throw fish at crank"
Floyd | >You throw the fat fish. It hits the crank before falling on the east
Floyd | ledge.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "throw staff at fish"
Floyd | >The staff smashes into the fat fish.
Floyd |
Floyd | The fat fish vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin sidekick appears on the east ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | The staff falls down on the east ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the fat fish is inside the orb now, tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
dsimon says, "Booyah"
inky says, "awesome"
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, turn crank"
Floyd | >The goblin turns the crank. There is a rumbling and the cave shakes. A
Floyd | vertical strip of light appears on the north wall. The strip widens
Floyd | into an opening. Light shines through it. It is an exit to the outside.
Floyd | The exit is reachable from the west ledge. The goblin looks perplexed.
Floyd | "I thought there was going to be a new bridge," he says. Then he looks
Floyd | a little scared. "Er, boss I hope you have a way of getting me off this
Floyd | ledge."
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by five points.]
Floyd |
DavidW says, "heh"
schep says, "yay"
inky says, "ha ha ha"
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, north"
Floyd | >"After you boss."
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, open door"
Floyd | >The goblin tries to open the door. "It is locked," he says. "And there
Floyd | is no key hole! Darnit, get me off this ledge right now!"
Floyd |
schep says (to Floyd), "goblin, throw staff at me"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "goblin, give staff to me"
Floyd | >"But I don't have that."
Floyd |
Floyd | >"But I don't have that."
Floyd |
schep says, "(yes, mine is probably a remarkably bad idea"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "goblin, take staff"
Floyd | >The goblin takes the staff.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "goblin, give staff to me"
Floyd | >"But I can't reach you, boss!"
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "goblin, throw staff at west ledge"
Floyd | >The goblin throws the staff onto the west ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by three points.]
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "take staff"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "cf17"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
inky asks, "now what?"
DavidW says, "I believe we can go north even though the goblin is trapped."
schep says (to Floyd), "l"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Cavernous cave (on the west ledge)
Floyd | Once again it's an abyss, a west ledge and an east ledge.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. A metal door,
Floyd | reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast. An exit to the outside,
Floyd | reachable from the west ledge, goes north.
Floyd | A large wooden crank sticks out from the east wall above the ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the east ledge you can see:
Floyd | Your goblin sidekick.
Floyd |
inky says, "oh, I see"
inky says, "I thought it was on the other ledge"
inky says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading east. To the south is a tall mountain
Floyd | wall, with a cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a pink-eyed hamster here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The hamster manages to bite one of your toes. You scream and jump back.
Floyd |
inky says, "so long, sucker"
inky says (to Floyd), "hit hamster with staff"
Floyd | >The pink-eyed hamster vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The fat fish appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the pink-eyed hamster is inside the orb now, tiny and
Floyd | unmoving.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get fish"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading west. To the south is a tall mountain
Floyd | wall. A metal door leads southwest.
Floyd | A red mailbox (for outgoing mail) is attached to the south wall.
Floyd |
Floyd | A huge wooden crate stands here. Stamps have been attached to it, and
Floyd | somebody has written something on it. Guess it was too big to fit in
Floyd | the mailbox. It is closed.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 2"
Floyd | >So, you have spotted a monster. How many legs does it have?
Floyd | None: read page 3
Floyd | One: read page 35
Floyd | Two: read page 36
Floyd | Three: read page 62
Floyd | Four: read page 63
Floyd | Six: read page 86
Floyd | Eight: read page 87
Floyd | Forty eight billion and five: read page 90
Floyd | It varies: read page 91
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 63"
Floyd | >Does it have hooves?
Floyd | Yes: read page 64
Floyd | No: read page 72
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 72"
Floyd | >Is it hairy?
Floyd | Yes: read page 73
Floyd | No: read page 79
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 73"
Floyd | >Is it bigger than a big rock?
Floyd | Yes: read page 74
Floyd | No: read page 75
Floyd |
Ellison asks, "that hamster has pink-eye? where has it been?"
inky says (to Floyd), "read 75"
Floyd | >What kind of eyes does it have?
Floyd | Pink: read page 76
Floyd | Cute: read page 77
Floyd | None: read page 78
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 76"
Floyd | >It is a Devil Hamster. These creatures have a bad reputation, and can
Floyd | be a little wild, but all they really need is love. Just pet it enough,
Floyd | and it will be your friend for life.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 77"
Floyd | >It is an ?s?s?t Cat. They lack a digestive system and cannot eat. They
Floyd | derive their energy from people petting them. They are the third cutest
Floyd | creatures in the world. Fairly harmless, although people have been
Floyd | known to die from exhaustion after petting them too much.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read 78"
Floyd | >It is a Wigfield. These small hairy creatures form symbiotic
Floyd | relationships with bald or balding humans by clutching onto their
Floyd | heads. The humans then appear to have hair, whilst the Wigfield suck
Floyd | minuscule amounts of blood from them. Harmless.
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
inky says (to Floyd), "read crate"
Floyd | >"To:  The king of Norway
Floyd |       The Norwegian Castle
Floyd |       Norway
Floyd |
Floyd | From: Melvin Hippoman
Floyd |       Cave 7318
Floyd |       Treasure Cave Mountain.
Floyd |
Floyd | Congratulations on your birthday old buddy!"
Floyd |
Floyd | Hmmmmm. The Norwegian castle. It would probably have lots of treasures,
Floyd | if only there was some way you could get there.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "open door"
Floyd | >The door is locked.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "unlock door"
Floyd | >What do you want to unlock the door with?
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "open crate"
Floyd | >You open the crate. It contains:
Floyd | A small black book: "Beyond the Meaning of Life" by Marvin Bronchitis.
Floyd |
Floyd | You wonder why somebody would use such a big crate to send such a small
Floyd | book.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "x book"
Floyd | >In this game you can't examine things. Instead use either "look" to
Floyd | see descriptions of the things in the room you are in, or "inventory"
Floyd | to see descriptions of what you are carrying. You also can't use "look
Floyd | inside", "look under", "look behind", "look <direction>" or "search".
Floyd | But you can use "read".
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "read book"
Floyd | >You flip through the book. Looks like philosophy. Hmmmm. Here is a
Floyd | logical proof that gods cannot exist! What utter rubbish! You have met
Floyd | several!
Floyd |
Floyd | A gust of wind pushes the lid of the crate, and the crate closes.
Floyd |
inky says, "heh"
inky says (to Floyd), "open crate"
Floyd | >You open the crate. It contains:
Floyd | A small black book: "Beyond the Meaning of Life" by Marvin Bronchitis.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to Floyd), "take book"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "enter crate"
Floyd | >You get into the crate.
Floyd |
Floyd | A gust of wind pushes the lid of the crate. The lid bounces into you,
Floyd | and moves back to where it was.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "wait"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "wait"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "wait"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | A gust of wind pushes the lid of the crate. The lid bounces into you,
Floyd | and moves back to where it was.
Floyd |
inky says, "oh wait"
inky says (to Floyd), "duck"
Floyd | >That's not a verb I recognise.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "curl up"
Floyd | >That's not a verb I recognise.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "lie down"
Floyd | >I didn't understand that sentence.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "lie"
Floyd | >(on top of the crate)
Floyd | But you are already in the crate.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "close crate"
Floyd | >Actually, the crate is not big enough to fit you when it is closed. It
Floyd | wouldn't even be big enough to fit the goblin.
Floyd |
inky says, "pshaw, and they call that a big crate"
inky says (to Floyd), "out"
Floyd | >You get out off the crate.
Floyd |
Floyd | A gust of wind pushes the lid of the crate, and the crate closes.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "look in mailbox"
Floyd | >In this game you can't examine things. Instead use either "look" to
Floyd | see descriptions of the things in the room you are in, or "inventory"
Floyd | to see descriptions of what you are carrying. You also can't use "look
Floyd | inside", "look under", "look behind", "look <direction>" or "search".
Floyd | But you can use "read".
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "open mailbox"
Floyd | >Never mind the mailbox.
Floyd |
inky says, "I guess the book is useful with the goddess of wisdom"
DavidW says, "yes"
inky says, "can we really not get the goblin out? that seems bogus"
DavidW says, "We can save the goblin later."
inky says, "ok fine"
inky says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading east. To the south is a tall mountain
Floyd | wall, with a cave.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Cavernous cave (on the west ledge)
Floyd | Once again it's an abyss, a west ledge and an east ledge.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. A metal door,
Floyd | reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast. An exit to the outside,
Floyd | reachable from the west ledge, goes north.
Floyd | A large wooden crank sticks out from the east wall above the ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the east ledge you can see:
Floyd | Your goblin sidekick.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "sw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Over-sized cave (on the east ledge)
Floyd | This cave is almost identical to the previous, with an abyss, a west
Floyd | ledge and an east ledge.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. Another exit,
Floyd | reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast.
Floyd | A small catapult, about as tall as you, is standing on the west ledge,
Floyd | aimed towards the east ledge. You have come across this type of
Floyd | catapult before. They are very easy to use, just put something in it,
Floyd | and it will be shot out automatically before the catapult adjusts
Floyd | itself so that it is ready to shoot again. These catapults are no
Floyd | longer being sold due to the large number of accidents they have
Floyd | caused.
Floyd | A large wooden crank sticks out from the east wall above the ledge.
Floyd | A narrow stone bridge goes from the east side of the room to the west,
Floyd | just below the ledges.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "sw"
inky says (to Floyd), "sw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Commodious cave (on the east ledge)
Floyd | A wide abyss fills almost the entire floor in this cave, with only two
Floyd | stone ledges to stand on. Both ledges go from the south end to the
Floyd | north end of the cave. One ledge comes out from the west wall, the
Floyd | other from the east wall.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. Another exit,
Floyd | reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast.
Floyd | A large button sticks up from the middle of the east ledge.
Floyd | A narrow stone bridge goes from the east side of the room to the west,
Floyd | just below the ledges.
Floyd |
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gargantuan cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the southwest and northeast.
Floyd | A large wooden crank sticks out from a wall.
Floyd | A lizard as long as your arm is clutched to the wall, high above the
Floyd | crank, its head facing downwards. It has huge bulging eyes. It is red,
Floyd | orange, yellow, blue, purple, pink, brown, gray and black.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "sw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Bumper cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the west. There is
Floyd | another exit to the northeast. Someone has chiseled gaps into the cave
Floyd | wall, forming a primitive ladder leading up to a hole in the ceiling.
Floyd | A table made from human skulls stands near the northeast exit. On the
Floyd | table stands a shimmering pink translucent cube and a small, rusty,
Floyd | holy grail.
Floyd | A small round stage stands close to the table. It is apparently made
Floyd | from human faces frozen in terrible screams.
Floyd | A small flamingo-headed man sits behind the table in a
Floyd | comfortable-looking armchair covered in obviously fake giraffe fur. He
Floyd | is wearing a jester's suit, including a ridiculous hat with bells on.
Floyd | He is staring at the pink cube.
Floyd | An armadillo-headed woman in a white toga sits next to him on a
Floyd | barstool made from green shimmering flames. She is reading a small
Floyd | orange book called "The Myth of Economics".
Floyd | A big pile of ashes lies next to her.
Floyd |
schep asks, "what, he doesn't plead with the PC every time we walk by?"
inky says (to Floyd), "give book to woman"
Floyd | >(the Beyond the Meaning of Life to the armadillo-headed woman)
Floyd | The armadillo-headed woman takes the book and starts reading. She reads
Floyd | faster than you have ever seen anybody read before. "Hmmmmm," she
Floyd | mutters. "This is slightly less pathetic that I thought it would be."
Floyd | She quickly turns a few more pages. "But what's this? The author says
Floyd | the existence of gods is logically impossible. Ha!" She quickly reads
Floyd | through about twenty more pages and wrinkles her brow. "His arguments
Floyd | are pretty good though. Surely there must be a flaw in his logic
Floyd | somewhere?" She quickly reads through the rest of the book. "Nope,
Floyd | there wasn't." With a loud pop she disappears. Shortly afterwards the
Floyd | flames in her barstool die down.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a flickering image inside the cube. The flamingo-headed man
Floyd | giggles and says, "Some woman in Brazil just stepped on a beehive."
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by three points.]
Floyd |
DavidW says, "not yet"
inky says (to Floyd), "look"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Bumper cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the west. There is
Floyd | another exit to the northeast. Someone has chiseled gaps into the cave
Floyd | wall, forming a primitive ladder leading up to a hole in the ceiling.
Floyd | A table made from human skulls stands near the northeast exit. On the
Floyd | table stands a shimmering pink translucent cube and a small, rusty,
Floyd | holy grail.
Floyd | A small round stage stands close to the table. It is apparently made
Floyd | from human faces frozen in terrible screams.
Floyd | A small flamingo-headed man sits behind the table in a
Floyd | comfortable-looking armchair covered in obviously fake giraffe fur. He
Floyd | is wearing a jester's suit, including a ridiculous hat with bells on.
Floyd | He is staring at the pink cube.
Floyd | A big pile of ashes lies behind the table.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "stand on stage"
Floyd | >You get on the stage.
Floyd |
Floyd | The flamingo-headed man turns around and looks at the stage.
Floyd |
Floyd | Suddenly a palm tree appears on the stage. You begin to walk towards
Floyd | it. You can't control your body. You stand just underneath the tree. A
Floyd | coconut falls from the tree onto your head. The flamingo-headed man
Floyd | giggles. The palm tree and coconut vanish.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "wait"
Floyd | >Time passes.
Floyd |
Floyd | Suddenly a small black cloud appears, hovering somewhere above the
Floyd | other side of the stage. You begin to walk towards it. You can't
Floyd | control your legs. You stop when you are standing directly under the
Floyd | cloud. Lightning strikes down from the cloud and hits you. The
Floyd | flamingo-headed man giggles. The cloud vanishes.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "out"
Floyd | >You get off the stage.
Floyd |
Floyd | The flamingo-headed man turns around and looks at the pink cube.
Floyd |
inky says, "hmm"
inky says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >25 gold coins
Floyd | A staff (with the hamster)
Floyd | A fat fish
Floyd | A saxophone
Floyd | A knife (sharpened)
Floyd | A bottle (open)
Floyd | A healing gun
Floyd | A manual
Floyd | A severed finger (with a ring)
Floyd | A severed head top
Floyd | A nosehairscrew (in your nose)
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | Mirrorshades
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
schep says (to Floyd), "get ashes"
Floyd | >Never mind the ashes.
Floyd |
inky says, "I assume we have to sabotage some of his antics or something"
inky says (to Floyd), "stand on stage"
Floyd | >You get on the stage.
Floyd |
Floyd | The flamingo-headed man turns around and looks at the stage.
Floyd |
Floyd | Suddenly a palm tree appears on the stage. You begin to walk towards
Floyd | it. You can't control your body. You stand just underneath the tree. A
Floyd | coconut falls from the tree onto your head. The flamingo-headed man
Floyd | giggles. The palm tree and coconut vanish.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "play sax"
Floyd | >The unearthly blare spewing forth from the instrument is hideous
Floyd | beyond comprehension. Your bones shiver from the obvious evil infusing
Floyd | every resonance of the soul-quenching noise and you feel like the
Floyd | eldritch sounds tear your mind apart and play ping-pong with your
Floyd | sanity. You were never a big fan of saxophone music.
Floyd |
Floyd | Suddenly a small black cloud appears, hovering somewhere above the
Floyd | other side of the stage. You begin to walk towards it. You can't
Floyd | control your legs. You stop when you are standing directly under the
Floyd | cloud. Lightning strikes down from the cloud and hits you. The
Floyd | flamingo-headed man giggles. The cloud vanishes.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "if we had the goblin we could put him on the stage"
inky says (to Floyd), "out"
Floyd | >You get off the stage.
Floyd |
Floyd | The flamingo-headed man turns around and looks at the pink cube.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a flickering image inside the cube. The flamingo-headed man
Floyd | giggles and says, "Some woman in Russia just got hit in the head by a
Floyd | coco-nut."
Floyd |
Ellison says (to Floyd), "search ashes"
Floyd | >In this game you can't examine things. Instead use either "look" to
Floyd | see descriptions of the things in the room you are in, or "inventory"
Floyd | to see descriptions of what you are carrying. You also can't use "look
Floyd | inside", "look under", "look behind", "look <direction>" or "search".
Floyd | But you can use "read".
Floyd |
djfletch says (to Floyd), "put fish on stage"
Floyd | >As you put the fat fish on the stage, the faces start to wiggle. It
Floyd | looks quite creepy. This makes the fat fish slide down on the floor.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "I'm hoping we haven't goofed up here by backtracking."
inky says, "uh-oh"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "get fish"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
Ellison says, "(I was unclear on how disposing of the goddess helped us)"
inky says, "yeah I dunno either"
inky says (to Floyd), "sit on stool"
Floyd | >You can't see any such thing.
Floyd |
djfletch says, "maybe she would have stopped us taking the grail if the comedy god didn't"
DavidW says, "yes, I think she'd prevent it"
djfletch asks, "can we do anything with the hamster?"
DavidW says, "yes"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "touch fish with staff"
Floyd | >The fat fish vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The hamster appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the fat fish is inside the orb now, tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | The hamster runs up to you and bites you on the toe. Then it runs off
Floyd | in the direction you found it.
Floyd |
schep says, "the manual suggested petting it"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | >Bumper cave
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
DavidW says, "ok good. We're not stuff."
DavidW says, "er stuck"
schep says (to Floyd), "hit flamingo with staff"
Floyd | >(the flamingo-headed man with the staff)
Floyd | You hit the flamingo-headed man with the staff. He giggles and says,
Floyd | "Magic doesn't work on gods."
Floyd |
DavidW says, "You guys were so close back at the mailbox."
djfletch says, "we should try petting the hamster I suppose"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "cf18"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
dsimon exclaims, "Oh, wait!"
dsimon asks, "Can the staff fit in the box?"
schep says, "had an idea, but didn't want to leave the region prematurely"
dsimon says, "If so, then we can mail ourselves in it"
inky says, "good call"
inky says (to Floyd), "brief"
Floyd | >The game is now in its normal brief printing mode, which gives long
Floyd | descriptions of places never before visited and short descriptions
Floyd | otherwise.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "ne.ne.ne"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gargantuan cave
Floyd |
Floyd | Commodious cave (on the west ledge)
Floyd | A wide abyss fills almost the entire floor in this cave, with only two
Floyd | stone ledges to stand on. Both ledges go from the south end to the
Floyd | north end of the cave. One ledge comes out from the west wall, the
Floyd | other from the east wall.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. Another exit,
Floyd | reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast.
Floyd | A large button sticks up from the middle of the east ledge.
Floyd | A narrow stone bridge goes from the east side of the room to the west,
Floyd | just below the ledges.
Floyd |
Floyd | Over-sized cave (on the west ledge)
Floyd | This cave is almost identical to the previous, with an abyss, a west
Floyd | ledge and an east ledge.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. Another exit,
Floyd | reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast.
Floyd | A small catapult, about as tall as you, is standing on the west ledge,
Floyd | aimed towards the east ledge. You have come across this type of
Floyd | catapult before. They are very easy to use, just put something in it,
Floyd | and it will be shot out automatically before the catapult adjusts
Floyd | itself so that it is ready to shoot again. These catapults are no
Floyd | longer being sold due to the large number of accidents they have
Floyd | caused.
Floyd | A large wooden crank sticks out from the east wall above the ledge.
Floyd | A narrow stone bridge goes from the east side of the room to the west,
Floyd | just below the ledges.
Floyd |
schep says (to Floyd), "enter catapult"
Floyd | >Nah, you figure you are just a tiny tad too heavy to be thrown across
Floyd | the abyss by the catapult.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "ne"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Cavernous cave (on the west ledge)
Floyd | Once again it's an abyss, a west ledge and an east ledge.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. A metal door,
Floyd | reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast. An exit to the outside,
Floyd | reachable from the west ledge, goes north.
Floyd | A large wooden crank sticks out from the east wall above the ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | On the east ledge you can see:
Floyd | Your goblin sidekick.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading east. To the south is a tall mountain
Floyd | wall, with a cave.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd |
Floyd | A huge wooden crate stands here. Stamps have been attached to it, and
Floyd | somebody has written something on it. Guess it was too big to fit in
Floyd | the mailbox. It is closed.
Floyd |
inky says, "f"
inky says, "er"
inky says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "pet hamster"
Floyd | >There is not much you can do to stuff that is inside the orb.
Floyd |
inky says, "oh, ah"
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd |
Floyd | A huge wooden crate stands here. Stamps have been attached to it, and
Floyd | somebody has written something on it. Guess it was too big to fit in
Floyd | the mailbox. It is closed.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "enter crate"
Floyd | >You can't get into the closed crate.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "open crate"
Floyd | >You open the crate. It is empty.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "enter crate"
Floyd | >You get into the crate.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit me with staff"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Suddenly you are somewhere else.
Floyd |
Floyd | Ballroom
Floyd | You are standing close to the center of a wonderful huge ballroom.
Floyd | There are exits in all directions, and there is an open window in the
Floyd | ceiling.
Floyd | The biggest, gaudiest chandelier you have ever seen lights the room.
Floyd | A birthday cake, which is taller than you, stands in a corner.
Floyd | A banner hangs from wall to wall.
Floyd | The fat queen of Norway stands near you. She looks rather bewildered.
Floyd | The princess of Finland is close by. She is holding a glass box with a
Floyd | small tag attached to it. Inside the box is a blue and pink bird.
Floyd | A large silver cage stands right next to you. It has quite wide gaps
Floyd | between the bars, but not wide enough for a person to go through. A
Floyd | large tag is hanging from it. Inside the cage is a bat, which is larger
Floyd | than you.
Floyd | Some guards stand in a circle around you. They are all holding
Floyd | crossbows.
Floyd | A huge crowd is spread around the room. It consists of royalty,
Floyd | ambassadors and ministers, all dressed up in their finest clothes and
Floyd | many of them holding presents. They all look rather shocked.
Floyd | The prime minister of Norway is being chased around the room by the
Floyd | hamster.
Floyd |
Floyd | A mail-ordered short metal staff with a clear orb on the end lies here.
Floyd | Its manufacturers say the staff will remove any creature that comes in
Floyd | contact with the orb. Inside the orb you can see the fat king of
Floyd | Norway. He is now tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | A huge wooden crate stands here. Stamps have been attached to it, and
Floyd | somebody has written something on it. It is open.
Floyd |
Floyd | The prime minister runs out the southeast exit, followed by the
Floyd | hamster.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by five points.]
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha ha"
inky says, "delightful"
DavidW says, "This section is timed. Good luck."
inky says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | >On a mountain ledge
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
inky says (to Floyd), "cf19"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "There's some leeway for experimentation."
inky says (to Floyd), "hit me with staff"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Suddenly you are somewhere else.
Floyd |
Floyd | Ballroom
Floyd | You are standing close to the center of a wonderful huge ballroom.
Floyd | There are exits in all directions, and there is an open window in the
Floyd | ceiling.
Floyd | The biggest, gaudiest chandelier you have ever seen lights the room.
Floyd | A birthday cake, which is taller than you, stands in a corner.
Floyd | A banner hangs from wall to wall.
Floyd | The fat queen of Norway stands near you. She looks rather bewildered.
Floyd | The princess of Finland is close by. She is holding a glass box with a
Floyd | small tag attached to it. Inside the box is a blue and pink bird.
Floyd | A large silver cage stands right next to you. It has quite wide gaps
Floyd | between the bars, but not wide enough for a person to go through. A
Floyd | large tag is hanging from it. Inside the cage is a bat, which is larger
Floyd | than you.
Floyd | Some guards stand in a circle around you. They are all holding
Floyd | crossbows.
Floyd | A huge crowd is spread around the room. It consists of royalty,
Floyd | ambassadors and ministers, all dressed up in their finest clothes and
Floyd | many of them holding presents. They all look rather shocked.
Floyd | The prime minister of Norway is being chased around the room by the
Floyd | hamster.
Floyd |
Floyd | A mail-ordered short metal staff with a clear orb on the end lies here.
Floyd | Its manufacturers say the staff will remove any creature that comes in
Floyd | contact with the orb. Inside the orb you can see the fat king of
Floyd | Norway. He is now tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | A huge wooden crate stands here. Stamps have been attached to it, and
Floyd | somebody has written something on it. It is open.
Floyd |
Floyd | The prime minister runs out the southeast exit, followed by the
Floyd | hamster.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by five points.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get staff"
Floyd | >Taken.
Floyd |
Floyd | The bat says, "Hey buddy! Seems like we are both in trouble. If you can
Floyd | get me out of this cage, I'll get you out of the castle!"
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "read tag"
Floyd | >Which do you mean, the large tag or the small tag?
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "read large tag"
Floyd | >"To the King of Norway
Floyd |  From the Duke of Brujljewjhutten
Floyd |  49 hoorays from me!"
Floyd |
Floyd | One of the guards says, "Hva er det som skjer? Har kongen forvandle seg
Floyd | til denna fyren?"
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "talk to bat"
Floyd | >"What am I supposed to do?" you ask.
Floyd | "Get me out of this cage."
Floyd |
Floyd | One of the guards says, "Nei, jeg tror kongen har forsvinni!"
Floyd |
schep says (to Floyd), "hit bat with staff"
Floyd | >The bat vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The fat king of Norway appears inside the large cage.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the bat is inside the orb now, tiny and unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | A man in the crowd screams "Det er revolusjonen!" Panic breaks out
Floyd | among the crowd, people shout and run away in all directions. The
Floyd | princess screams and escapes through the west exit. In her haste she
Floyd | drops the glass box, which shatters. The bird flies up and sits in the
Floyd | chandelier. The guards aim their crossbows at you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit me with staff"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Suddenly you are somewhere else.
Floyd |
Floyd | You are standing in the middle of a small dirty cell. The only light
Floyd | comes from a small window with bars. A wooden bench is attached to a
Floyd | wall. A couple of rats are scampering around. In front of you stand two
Floyd | guards. The first is holding a crossbow aimed at you. The other is
Floyd | holding your staff. Inside the orb you can see a rat, tiny and
Floyd | unmoving.
Floyd | "Vi skj?nte nok ?ssen staven din virka!" says the first guard. "S? n?
Floyd | sitter'u i fella!"
Floyd | "Ja!" says the other. "Du m? bli her ei hel uke! Ha-ha-ha!"
Floyd | They leave through a massive iron door. It slams shut, and you can hear
Floyd | the sound of it being locked.
Floyd |
Floyd |     *** You are in jail! ***
Floyd |
Floyd |
Floyd | In that game you scored 89 out of a possible 100, in 739 turns.
Floyd |
Floyd | Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, UNDO your last move or
Floyd | QUIT?
schep says, "no, see, I released your king! ... into a cage, sure"
inky says, "darn"
inky says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | > Ballroom
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
djfletch asks, "do we have the fish?"
inky says (to Floyd), "hit fish with staff"
Floyd | >You lift the fish up to hit it with your staff. Suddenly one of the
Floyd | guards fires. The arrow hits the fish, which is pulled out of your
Floyd | hand. Both fish and arrow disappear out the northeast exit.
Floyd | "Jeg trur han p?nska p? no' med den fisken!" says the guard that shot.
Floyd | "Ja!" says a couple of the other guards.
Floyd |
Floyd | The king says, "?ffer er jeg her inne a?"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "throw staff at bird"
Floyd | >You throw the staff. It hits the chandelier and falls down without
Floyd | hurting the bird.
Floyd |
Floyd | A guard says, "Hva gj?r vi n? a?"
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | >Ballroom
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit princess with staff"
Floyd | >You can't see any such thing.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "hit queen with staff"
Floyd | >The queen of Norway vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The bat appears.
Floyd |
Floyd | You notice that the queen of Norway is inside the orb now, tiny and
Floyd | unmoving.
Floyd |
Floyd | The bat says, "Hey, great going buddy! Now jump up on my back, and
Floyd | let's blow this joint!"
Floyd | You climb onto the bat's back, holding onto his fur. The bat takes off,
Floyd | up towards the window. An arrow swishes past your head.
Floyd | "Ah, drat!" says the bat and flies behind the chandelier.
Floyd | Many arrows hit the chandelier. You look down. The guards have moved
Floyd | into the center of the room, right below the window, and they are
Floyd | shooting at you. The arrows keep hitting the chandelier, wich shakes.
Floyd | This apparently spooks the bird, and it takes off. For a moment it
Floyd | looks as if it is going to fly out the window, but then it starts
Floyd | flying in circles just below it.
Floyd | The bat says, "We can't make it to the window, we'll be shot to death.
Floyd | We need to get rid of them guards!"
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "cut chandelier with knife"
Floyd | >Never mind the chandelier.
Floyd |
Floyd | The bat says, "Buddy, we are in up to our necks in trouble. You better
Floyd | figure out something."
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "play sax"
Floyd | >The unearthly blare spewing forth from the instrument is hideous
Floyd | beyond comprehension. Your bones shiver from the obvious evil infusing
Floyd | every resonance of the soul-quenching noise and you feel like the
Floyd | eldritch sounds tear your mind apart and play ping-pong with your
Floyd | sanity. You were never a big fan of saxophone music.
Floyd |
Floyd | The arrows make the chandelier shake.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | >Ballroom
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
inky says, "hmm"
inky says (to Floyd), "is"
Floyd | >25 gold coins
Floyd | A staff (with the queen)
Floyd | A saxophone
Floyd | A knife (sharpened)
Floyd | A bottle (open)
Floyd | A healing gun
Floyd | A manual
Floyd | A severed finger (with a ring)
Floyd | A severed head top
Floyd | A nosehairscrew (in your nose)
Floyd |
Floyd | You are wearing:
Floyd | Mirrorshades
Floyd | Boxer shorts.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "pour bottle on guards"
Floyd | >You can't do that from the bat's back.
Floyd |
Floyd | The arrows make the chandelier shake.
Floyd |
djfletch asks, "can we hit the bird now?"
inky says (to Floyd), "undo"
Floyd | >Ballroom
Floyd | [Previous turn undone.]
Floyd |
DavidW says, "I think so."
inky says (to Floyd), "hit bird with staff"
Floyd | >The bird vanishes.
Floyd |
Floyd | The fat queen of Norway appears in the air, and immediately falls down
Floyd | right on top of the guards. They all go "Ompf!"
Floyd |
Floyd | The bat laughs and flies out the window.
Floyd | "Where to, buddy?" he asks.
Floyd | "You know where Treasure Cave Mountain is?"
Floyd | "Sure do, kid! Hang on!" the bat flaps his wings, and speeds up a lot.
Floyd | You really do have to hang on.
Floyd |
Floyd | The trip takes a day and a night. On the way you get caught up in a
Floyd | hurricane, attacked by a flock of ducks, and hit by lightning. The
Floyd | lightning causes you to drop the staff, and it falls into a lake. After
Floyd | that the trip is eventless. Finally you can see Treasure Cave Mountain.
Floyd | You must have been gone several weeks, it is covered in snow!
Floyd |
Floyd | The bat flies down and hovers next to the ledge on the north side of
Floyd | the mountain. You jump off.
Floyd | "Anything else I can do for you buddy?" asks the bat.
Floyd | "Well, there's this locked door..."
Floyd | "Say no more, say no more." The bat grabs the door with his massive
Floyd | claws, flaps his wings and flies backwards. There is a terrible sound
Floyd | as the door is torn from its hinges. The bat drops the door; it
Floyd | disappears far below.
Floyd | "Hey, thanks a lot!" you say.
Floyd | "Yeah, thanks to you too! And good luck!" The bat waves a claw, and
Floyd | flies away.
Floyd | You hear some moaning from the southwest.
Floyd |
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading west. To the south is a tall mountain
Floyd | wall. There is a cave to the southwest.
Floyd | A red mailbox (for outgoing mail) is attached to the south wall.
Floyd | The ground is covered in snow.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
inky says, "oh, yeah"
inky says, "aw, our staff"
inky says, "alas"
inky says, "it was too beautiful to live"
inky says (to Floyd), "get snow"
Floyd | >Never mind the snow.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "sw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Cavernous cave (on the east ledge)
Floyd | Once again it's an abyss, a west ledge and an east ledge.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. An exit to the
Floyd | outside, reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast. An exit to the
Floyd | outside, reachable from the west ledge, goes north.
Floyd | A large wooden crank sticks out from the east wall above the ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin sidekick is lying here, looking half dead and very thin.
Floyd |
Floyd | "Goblin," you say. "how have you been?"
Floyd | "You bastard! You left me here for all those weeks! I'm starving to
Floyd | death! Get me something to eat!"
Floyd |
inky says, "poor guy"
inky says (to Floyd), "shoot gun at goblin"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | You pull the trigger. A white ray shoots out of the gun and hits the
Floyd | goblin. The goblin smiles and wiggles his ears. He looks at his foot.
Floyd | "Hey, my toe fungus is gone!" he says.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "ne"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading west. To the south is a tall mountain
Floyd | wall. There is a cave to the southwest.
Floyd | A red mailbox (for outgoing mail) is attached to the south wall.
Floyd | The ground is covered in snow.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get hamster"
Floyd | >You can't see any such thing.
Floyd |
inky says, "oops"
inky says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >You are not testing The Pebble That Protects You From Falling Down
Floyd | From Really High Places this month. It was a complete scam anyway.
Floyd |
inky says, "I guess I lost the hamster somehow"
DavidW says, "That gun wasn't food, and the hamster's in Norway."
schep says, "yeah, it chased off somebody at the castle"
inky says, "oh right"
inky says, "hmm"
inky asks, "do goblins eat fish?"
schep says, "if they're starving, probably"
Ellison asks, "the lizard is going to be food for something at some point, right?"
inky says, "it does taste like something delicious"
DavidW says, "You lost the fish, although you could get another, I suppose. But you have food already.,"
inky says, "uh-oh"
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "sw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Cavernous cave (on the east ledge)
Floyd | Once again it's an abyss, a west ledge and an east ledge.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. An exit to the
Floyd | outside, reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast. An exit to the
Floyd | outside, reachable from the west ledge, goes north.
Floyd | A large wooden crank sticks out from the east wall above the ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin sidekick is lying here, looking half dead and very thin.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "give finger to goblin"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | You can't give away things that are stuck on your body.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "give severed finger to goblin"
Floyd | >(the goblin sidekick)
Floyd | You give your severed finger to the goblin.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin throws the finger into his mouth, briefly chews on it, then
Floyd | swallows it, ring and all. The goblin gets up and says, "I'm feeling
Floyd | much better now, boss!"
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
inky says (to Floyd), "ne"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | A narrow mountain ledge leading west. To the south is a tall mountain
Floyd | wall. There is a cave to the southwest.
Floyd | A red mailbox (for outgoing mail) is attached to the south wall.
Floyd | The ground is covered in snow.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Ellison says, "heh, ew"
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Cavernous cave (on the west ledge)
Floyd | Once again it's an abyss, a west ledge and an east ledge.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. An exit to the
Floyd | outside, reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast. An exit to the
Floyd | outside, reachable from the west ledge, goes north.
Floyd | A large wooden crank sticks out from the east wall above the ledge.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "sw.sw.sw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Over-sized cave (on the east ledge)
Floyd | This cave is almost identical to the previous, with an abyss, a west
Floyd | ledge and an east ledge.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. Another exit,
Floyd | reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast.
Floyd | A small catapult, about as tall as you, is standing on the west ledge,
Floyd | aimed towards the east ledge. You have come across this type of
Floyd | catapult before. They are very easy to use, just put something in it,
Floyd | and it will be shot out automatically before the catapult adjusts
Floyd | itself so that it is ready to shoot again. These catapults are no
Floyd | longer being sold due to the large number of accidents they have
Floyd | caused.
Floyd | A large wooden crank sticks out from the east wall above the ledge.
Floyd | A narrow stone bridge goes from the east side of the room to the west,
Floyd | just below the ledges.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | Commodious cave (on the east ledge)
Floyd | A wide abyss fills almost the entire floor in this cave, with only two
Floyd | stone ledges to stand on. Both ledges go from the south end to the
Floyd | north end of the cave. One ledge comes out from the west wall, the
Floyd | other from the east wall.
Floyd | An exit, reachable from the west ledge, leads southwest. Another exit,
Floyd | reachable from the east ledge, goes northeast.
Floyd | A large button sticks up from the middle of the east ledge.
Floyd | A narrow stone bridge goes from the east side of the room to the west,
Floyd | just below the ledges.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | Gargantuan cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the southwest and northeast.
Floyd | A large wooden crank sticks out from a wall.
Floyd | A lizard as long as your arm is clutched to the wall, high above the
Floyd | crank, its head facing downwards. It has huge bulging eyes. It is red,
Floyd | orange, yellow, blue, purple, pink, brown, gray and black.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "sw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Bumper cave
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "look" schep asks, "I missed how he got off the ledge. or did we reach him through the door the bat opened?"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Bumper cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the west. There is
Floyd | another exit to the northeast. Someone has chiseled gaps into the cave
Floyd | wall, forming a primitive ladder leading up to a hole in the ceiling.
Floyd | A table made from human skulls stands near the northeast exit. On the
Floyd | table stands a shimmering pink translucent cube and a small, rusty,
Floyd | holy grail.
Floyd | A small round stage stands close to the table. It is apparently made
Floyd | from human faces frozen in terrible screams.
Floyd | A small flamingo-headed man sits behind the table in a
Floyd | comfortable-looking armchair covered in obviously fake giraffe fur. He
Floyd | is wearing a Santa Claus suit. He is staring at the pink cube.
Floyd | A beautifully decorated Christmas tree stands in a corner.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see the goblin sidekick here.
Floyd |
inky says, "yeah"
DavidW says, "yes"
inky says (to Floyd), "talk to man"
Floyd | >"What is the weird stage for?" you ask.
Floyd | "It's mine. It's my altar. Where my followers stand when they worship
Floyd | me."
Floyd |
schep asks, "did we mess up the hamster part?"
djfletch says (to Floyd), "goblin, get on stage"
Floyd | >The goblin gets on the stage.
Floyd |
Floyd | The flamingo-headed man turns around and looks at the stage.
Floyd |
Floyd | Suddenly a small cactus appears on the stage. The goblin walks up to
Floyd | it. Then he turns so that his back faces the cactus. He sits down on
Floyd | the cactus. He jumps up again howling with pain. The flamingo-headed
Floyd | man giggles. The cactus vanishes.
Floyd |
inky asks, "is there anything good upstairs?"
inky says (to Floyd), "get grail"
Floyd | >You quickly steal the grail while the flamingo-headed man is not
Floyd | looking.
Floyd |
Floyd | Suddenly a large gorilla appears on the stage. The gorilla knocks the
Floyd | goblin over, then proceeds to jump up and down on the goblin's back.
Floyd | The flamingo-headed man giggles. The gorilla vanishes. The goblin gets
Floyd | up.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a flickering image inside the cube.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by three points.]
Floyd |
DavidW says, "no, the hamster was done right."
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, get down"
Floyd | >"I can't reach that from the stage."
Floyd |
Floyd | Suddenly a rake appears, lying on the stage. The goblin walks towards
Floyd | it. He steps on it, so that the handle flies up and smashes him in the
Floyd | face. The flamingo-headed man giggles. The rake vanishes.
Floyd |
schep says, "huh."
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, out"
Floyd | >The goblin gets off the stage.
Floyd |
Floyd | The flamingo-headed man turns around and looks at the pink cube.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "score"
Floyd | >You have so far scored 95 out of a possible 100, in 765 turns.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "almost done"
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "verbose"
Floyd | >The game is now in its verbose mode, which always gives long
Floyd | descriptions of locations (even if you've been there before).
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "l"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the south, or you can go
Floyd | further into the mountain to the north.
Floyd | A small fire is burning here.
Floyd | A tough-looking dwarf, wearing chain mail and a helmet, is sitting on
Floyd | the floor near the fire. He is holding an axe almost as big as himself.
Floyd | He is chewing on a short bone.
Floyd | The skeleton of a donkey is lying here.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see the goblin sidekick here.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "give grail to dwarf"
Floyd | >The dwarf grabs the grail, stuffs it inside his chain mail, and pulls
Floyd | out five gold coins that he throws to you. He stomps out the fire. Then
Floyd | he walks away to the south.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the north. There is
Floyd | also an exit to the south.
Floyd | A red automat, hundred of meters tall, stands in the middle of the
Floyd | cave. Despite the insane magnitude of the machine, its money-slot and
Floyd | buttons are normal-sized and placed at normal height. The
Floyd | merchandise-slot is also close to the floor, but huge enough to hold a
Floyd | horse. You have come across these automats before. Several companies
Floyd | have recently begun placing them in dangerous places, for adventurers
Floyd | who need equipment. They are easy to use; just buy something. Something
Floyd | is written on the automat next to the buttons.
Floyd | A huge pile of fish bones lies near a wall.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "buy wheelbarrow"
Floyd | >You put the coins in the slot and push the appropriate button. There
Floyd | is some rumbling from the machine. Then a wheelbarrow falls down in the
Floyd | slot, and bounces out onto the cave floor.
Floyd |
Floyd | [Your score has just gone up by one point.]
Floyd |
inky says, "poor donkey"
inky says (to Floyd), "push wheelbarrow north"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a little blood here.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "There's a lot of changes if you care to explore."
inky says (to Floyd), "SAVE"
inky says (to Floyd), "cf20"
Floyd | >Enter saved game to store: Ok.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "get diamond"
Floyd | >This thing is really heavy. You just barely manage to pick it up. Your
Floyd | back creaks ominously.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "put diamond on wheelbarrow"
Floyd | >You put the diamond into the wheelbarrow. Afterwards it's only a
Floyd | matter of days before you have managed to transport the diamond back to
Floyd | the Adventurer's Consumer Guide's headquarters. Your mission is
Floyd | accomplished.
Floyd |
Floyd |     ***Hooray!***
Floyd |
Floyd |
Floyd | In that game you scored 100 out of a possible 100, in 775 turns.
Floyd |
Floyd | Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, UNDO your last move,
Floyd | see some suggestions for AMUSING things to do or QUIT?
inky says, "hooray"
Ellison says, "yay"
inky says (to Floyd), "amusing"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Put sugar in the saltshaker.
Floyd | Tickle yourself with a feather.
Floyd | Ring someone's doorbell, then run away.
Floyd | Engage in witty banter with friends or co-workers.
Floyd | Throw someone a surprise party, who doesn't even have a birthday!
Floyd | For men only: dress up like a chick and pick up some guy in a bar.
Floyd | Then, right before you are going to have sex, reveal your true self!
Floyd | Call someone and ask them if their refrigerator is running. If they say
Floyd | yes, tell them "Well, you better try to catch it then!".
Floyd |
Floyd | Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, UNDO your last move,
Floyd | see some suggestions for AMUSING things to do or QUIT?
djfletch exclaims, "victory!"
inky says, "ha ha"
schep says, "ha ha awesome"
Ellison says, "ha ha clever"
DavidW says, "heh"
inky says (to Floyd), "RESTORE"
inky says (to Floyd), "cf20"
Floyd | > Enter saved game to load: Ok.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Prodigious and very hot cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the east.
Floyd | It is terribly hot here. The intolerable temperature is almost
Floyd | certainly caused by the red-hot stone oven standing in a corner.
Floyd | A stone table stands in the middle of the cave. Round it stands a stone
Floyd | throne with an old troll, a stone chair with a tall troll, a stone
Floyd | stool with a short troll, and a large stone. The trolls look a bit like
Floyd | humans made of stone, though with no necks, bigger jaws, smaller eyes
Floyd | and huge arms and hands. They are drinking lava from large stone mugs
Floyd | and playing some kind of card game.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | "Hey, what happened to the golem? you ask.
Floyd | "Ur, remember when there was that terrible scream?" says a troll.
Floyd | "Right afterwards the golem just crumbled to dust."
Floyd |
inky says, "I don't really get why we had to go through that whole sequence with norway etc"
DavidW says, "If you'd sold the first grail to the dwarf, the barbarian would've eaten his horse while you're in Norway."
DavidW says, "To get the goblin back."
inky says, "hmm"
inky asks, "couldn't we have distracted the comedy god with the goblin first, then later gotten the book and given it to the wisdom god, leaving the goblin stranded?"
DavidW says, "You needed the bat to open the door to get the goblin to get the grail to sell for the gp to buy the wheelbarrow to put the diamond in."
schep says, "then athena would have still been there"
DavidW says, "no, because the wisdom god would've snitched."
inky says, "I guess I don't know what getting rid of the wisdom god did"
inky says, "ah, ok"
inky says (to Floyd), "talk to old troll"
Floyd | >"That was a fun game," you say. The old troll sulks.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a little blood here.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can also see a wheelbarrow (which is empty) here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "n"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Tremendous Cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from this cave's only exit to the
Floyd | south.
Floyd | Some runes are written on the wall.
Floyd | A hippoman, half man, half hippo, stands knitting something yellow. He
Floyd | is fat, purple and has two very thick legs. He is wearing your helmet
Floyd | and a yellow wool suit.
Floyd | A young angry-looking woman wearing a yellow wool jacket and yellow
Floyd | wool gloves, stands holding a large placard saying "Save the carrot
Floyd | fairy!" She is clearly one of those monster rights activists that have
Floyd | been making your job so much harder lately.
Floyd | The gremlin has climbed quite high up on the wall. He is a small green
Floyd | humanoid creature with pointy ears. He is wearing a tiny ring and a
Floyd | yellow woolen cap and is smoking a tiny cigarette.
Floyd | A carrot with tiny wings flies around. Its arms and legs look like
Floyd | those of a human, only much smaller. It has no head or face. It is
Floyd | wearing a yellow woolen scarf. A steady shower of shimmering sparks
Floyd | falls from all over its body; each spark disappears before hitting the
Floyd | ground.
Floyd | A large metal chest stands up against a wall. It is open and empty.
Floyd | A large machine is at the back of the cave. Its mechanisms looks very
Floyd | complex. Actually it is very easy to use. You know this because on a
Floyd | previous product-testing mission you came across a machine just like it
Floyd | and spend four hours trying to figure out how it worked. The machine is
Floyd | for sharpening tools and weapons. Just put what you want sharpened into
Floyd | it and wait.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is quite a lot of blood here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says, "ha ha"
inky says, "this is cute"
inky says, "the genie would have liked it even better, too bad he's dead"
DavidW says, "The hoverist, elf, and female goblin are a little different too."
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Huge cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the north, east, south and west.
Floyd | A stone pedestal as tall as you stands in a corner.
Floyd |
Floyd | There is a little blood here.
Floyd |
Floyd | A diamond the size of your chest lies in the middle of the cave. A
Floyd | tremendous light shines out from it and fills the entire cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can also see a wheelbarrow (which is empty) here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Gigantic cave
Floyd | An extremely bright light comes from an exit to the north. There is
Floyd | also an exit to the south.
Floyd | A red automat, hundred of meters tall, stands in the middle of the
Floyd | cave. Despite the insane magnitude of the machine, its money-slot and
Floyd | buttons are normal-sized and placed at normal height. The
Floyd | merchandise-slot is also close to the floor, but huge enough to hold a
Floyd | horse. You have come across these automats before. Several companies
Floyd | have recently begun placing them in dangerous places, for adventurers
Floyd | who need equipment. They are easy to use; just buy something. Something
Floyd | is written on the automat next to the buttons.
Floyd | A huge pile of fish bones lies near a wall.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Spacious cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the south, or you can go
Floyd | further into the mountain to the north.
Floyd | The skeleton of a donkey is lying here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "s"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd | The ground is covered in snow.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "ne"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Vast cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the southwest. In the middle
Floyd | of the ceiling, high above you, is a round hole. On the floor, directly
Floyd | under the hole, is a pile of hay.
Floyd | A short lever with a handle sticks out from a wall. The handle has a
Floyd | thin, wide gap, large enough for the fingers of one hand to go through.
Floyd | A metallic pyramid, about half a meter high, sticks up from the cave
Floyd | floor. You once tested a hundred different teleporters, and you
Floyd | recognize the pyramid as one of the safest and least complicated
Floyd | models. To use it you just stand on it and shake the lever repeatedly.
Floyd | This particular teleporter seems badly designed though: the lever is
Floyd | far away from it, almost on the other side of the cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can hear a low humming coming from the teleporter.
Floyd |
Floyd | Up from the lever sticks the new magical sword from Adventurer's
Floyd | Emporium. According to the commercial it will start to vibrate when you
Floyd | are close to danger. It is shaking like crazy, but not enough to shake
Floyd | the lever.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see a cage here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword goes even crazier and starts thrashing like a headless
Floyd | chicken on drugs.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The sound from the teleporter gets
Floyd | louder.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, stand on teleporter"
Floyd | >The goblin gets on the teleporter.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The sound gets even louder. A few
Floyd | electrical sparks shoots up from the teleporter. The goblin giggles.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "stand on teleporter"
Floyd | >You get on the teleporter.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. The teleporter starts shaking and
Floyd | smoking. The cave begins to fade out around you, and another cave fades
Floyd | in.
Floyd |
Floyd | Voluminous cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit to the east. In the middle of the floor is a
Floyd | round hole.
Floyd | A huge monster skeleton lies here, with an elf skeleton in its mouth.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin begins to fade in next to you. You look down at yourself.
Floyd | You seem unsubstantial, like a ghost. Slowly you begin to take on a
Floyd | more solid form. Now you look normal.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "nw"
Floyd | >You are not testing the Suspenders That Let You Walk Through Walls on
Floyd | this trip; that was seven months ago. Just as well, they stopped
Floyd | working very suddenly. You were stuck for a week. If those dwarves had
Floyd | decided to build their new mine anywhere else, you might never have
Floyd | gotten out.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "e"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Capacious cave
Floyd | This cave has exits to the west and northwest.
Floyd | A goblin woman is standing here. She is wearing a medallion, winter
Floyd | boots, a long fur coat and a round fur hat. She is carrying a purse.
Floyd | You are not quite sure, but with her long ears, sharp yellow teeth, and
Floyd | big feet you think she is pretty cute by goblin standards. She is
Floyd | holding your magical crossbow.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
Floyd | "Well, hello there!" says the female goblin and smiles.
Floyd |
Floyd | "Uh, hi," says the goblin, his cheeks turning a darker shade of green.
Floyd | They seem distracted.
Floyd |
inky asks, "did we ever find out the deal with the medallion?"
inky says, "I guess it is just decoration"
inky says (to Floyd), "w"
Floyd | >"Come along now," you say to the goblin as you leave.
Floyd |
Floyd | Voluminous cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit to the east. In the middle of the floor is a
Floyd | round hole.
Floyd | A huge monster skeleton lies here, with an elf skeleton in its mouth.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin reluctantly walks in from the east, throwing several glances
Floyd | over his shoulder.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "goblin, east"
Floyd | >"After you boss."
Floyd |
DavidW says, "btw, the medallion prevents you tapping her with the orb."
inky says (to Floyd), "enter hole"
Floyd | >You jump down the hole. You land in a pile of hay. You hear someone
Floyd | shouting, "Wheeeeeee!" and you look up. The goblin is falling right
Floyd | towards you. You quickly roll to the side, and the goblin lands in the
Floyd | hay. You two get up.
Floyd |
Floyd | Vast cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit leading outside to the southwest. In the middle
Floyd | of the ceiling, high above you, is a round hole. On the floor, directly
Floyd | under the hole, is a pile of hay.
Floyd | A short lever with a handle sticks out from a wall. The handle has a
Floyd | thin, wide gap, large enough for the fingers of one hand to go through.
Floyd | A metallic pyramid, about half a meter high, sticks up from the cave
Floyd | floor. You once tested a hundred different teleporters, and you
Floyd | recognize the pyramid as one of the safest and least complicated
Floyd | models. To use it you just stand on it and shake the lever repeatedly.
Floyd | This particular teleporter seems badly designed though: the lever is
Floyd | far away from it, almost on the other side of the cave.
Floyd |
Floyd | Up from the lever sticks the new magical sword from Adventurer's
Floyd | Emporium. According to the commercial it will start to vibrate when you
Floyd | are close to danger. It is shaking like crazy, but not enough to shake
Floyd | the lever.
Floyd |
Floyd | You can see the goblin sidekick and a cage here.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword goes even crazier and starts thrashing like a headless
Floyd | chicken on drugs.
Floyd |
Floyd | The sword makes the lever shake. There comes a low humming sound from
Floyd | the teleporter.
Floyd |
inky says, "ah, sensible"
schep asks, "any way to change the lizard's flavor?"
inky says (to Floyd), "sw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | On a mountain ledge
Floyd | The end of a narrow mountain ledge leading west. The tall mountain wall
Floyd | has three caves: to the northwest, north and northeast.
Floyd | The ground is covered in snow.
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
inky says (to Floyd), "nw"
Floyd | >
Floyd | Big cave
Floyd | This cave has an exit southeast to the outside, or you could go further
Floyd | into the mountain to the northwest.
Floyd | A somewhat larger than life-size statue of his holiness One-Hand Jack
Floyd | stands in the middle of the cave. Jack used to be an infamous pirate,
Floyd | but later formed Hoverism, a peaceful religion. The statue holds its
Floyd | left arm out and up, the hook at the end of it just low enough to be
Floyd | reached. The statue's head is gone.
Floyd | An old Hoverist is hovering about a meter above the floor. He is
Floyd | sitting in the lotus position, his head is turned towards the statue,
Floyd | and his eyes are closed. He is wearing a white loincloth. Somebody has
Floyd | hung some Christmas ornaments on him.
Floyd | Several fragments from the safe are lying here.
Floyd |
Floyd | Though you cannot see it, you know that a Hustlespleen & Poe Coat of
Floyd | Invisibility hangs on the hook. It is supposed to turn visible (or turn
Floyd | invisible again) whenever you say the magic word "tango".
Floyd |
Floyd | The goblin comes running after you.
Floyd |
DavidW says (to schep), "not that I tried."
inky says, "heh"
DavidW says, "I did try stranding various critters on the east ledges."
DavidW says, "All of them manage to escape, in one way or another."
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take organments"
Floyd | >You can't see any such thing.
Floyd |
dsimon says (to Floyd), "take ornaments"
Floyd | >Never mind the Christmas ornaments.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "Also, you can do a double act on the stage with the goblin."
dsimon asks, "What is the name of this game?"
schep says (to Floyd), "about"
Floyd | >Adventurer's Consumer Guide
Floyd | You are a product tester for the Adventurer's Consumer Guide, a
Floyd | magazine that reviews all sorts of equipment an adventurer might need
Floyd | for his adventures. Your magazine is highly respected because of the
Floyd | thorough tests you put the equipment through. The tests aren't just
Floyd | done at the magazine's offices. No, the product testers go on actual
Floyd | adventures to test the equipment out in the field. Sometimes you kill
Floyd | an evil overlord; sometimes you rescue a fair maiden. Most of the time,
Floyd | like today, you just go out looking for a treasure in Treasure Cave
Floyd | Mountain, a perfect place for adventures as it contains plenty of
Floyd | caves, treasures, monsters and traps.
Floyd |
Floyd | As you are putting on the soon-to-be-tested magical coat, magical ring
Floyd | and magical helmet, your editor says, "On this mission you'll be having
Floyd | a helper with you."
Floyd | "Really?" you say. You usually work alone.
Floyd | "Yeah, but it's part of a test. See, there's this new agency that is
Floyd | renting out sidekicks. We are going to write a review about it. Oh,
Floyd | here he is now."
Floyd | Into your office walks a goblin: a green humanoid creature with pointy
Floyd | ears, about a meter tall. "Hi, you must be my new boss," he says to
Floyd | you.
Floyd | "I guess I am. What is it you're supposed to do, exactly?"
Floyd | "Well, I'm very brave and helpful, plus I'm a ferocious killing
Floyd | machine. If you see any kind of monster, or anything at all, and you
Floyd | want it killed, just tell me, and it's toast."
Floyd | "Okay... well, I think we should get going."
Floyd |
Floyd | You and your new companion are off to Treasure Cave Mountain. Your
Floyd | mission is to return with one really big treasure. Any really big
Floyd | treasure.
Floyd |
Floyd | If you are unfamiliar with interactive fiction, type HELP.
Floyd | If you care, type CREDITS.
Floyd | In this game you can't examine things. Instead use either "look" to see
Floyd | descriptions of the things in the room you are in, or "inventory" to
Floyd | see descriptions of what you are carrying. You also can't use "look
Floyd | inside", "look under", "look behind", "look <direction>" or "search".
Floyd | But you can use "read".
Floyd | To see your inventory without the long descriptions of all you are
Floyd | carrying, type: "inventory short". Or simply: "i s". Or simply: "is".
Floyd | No time passes when you use "look" or "inventory".
Floyd | You communicate by "talk to [whatever]", or by giving commands in this
Floyd | format: "goblin, give me the cow-o-meter".
Floyd | It is possible to put this game in an unwinnable state, but you should
Floyd | be able to figure out when this has happened.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "Adventurer's Consumer Guide"
inky says, "cunning"
DavidW says (to Floyd), "credits"
Floyd | >Written by ?yvind Thorsby. Bug reports/comments can be sent to
Floyd | jthorsby@broadpark.no
Floyd | Beta-tested by:
Floyd | Valentine Koptelsev
Floyd | Nathan D. Jerpe
Floyd | Javri
Floyd | Jessica Knoch
Floyd | J. Robinson Wheeler
Floyd | Jim Aikin
Floyd | Eric Forgeot
Floyd | Alexander Westcott
Floyd | Al
Floyd | Thanks to all the helpful people at rec.arts.int-fiction.
Floyd |
DavidW says, "lotsa testers"
dsimon says, "Ok, this was a lot of fun. I've got to get going now, so take care everyone."
dsimon goes home.
dsimon has disconnected. inky says, "yeah, thanks guys"
Johnny says, "Bye dsi... whistle"
schep has had his fill of playing for now, and goes back to the Lounge. inky says, "I've been meaning to play this for ages"
inky has had his fill of playing for now, and goes back to the Lounge. DavidW says, "yes, thanks everyone."
djfletch says, "yup, good game"
DavidW says, "yay. Glad you all liked it!"



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