  
 
The idea behind ClubFloyd is that each week at a pre-arranged time, a group of people meet online to cooperatively play a game of interactive fiction. Below is a transcript of Little Blue Men, written by Michael S. Gentry. Little Blue Men was originally released during the 1998 Interactive Fiction Competition, where it took 7th place. It received XYZZY nominations for Best Individual PC, Best Game, Best Writing, Best Story, and Best Individual Puzzle, and ultimately took the XYZZY for Best Individual PC. You can learn more about the game, including how to download it, by visiting Baf's Guide, WARNING! Below you will find a transcript of people playing this game, and it goes without saying that the transcript is full of spoilers. So, if you've never played this game, and think you might like to at some point, I do not recommend reading any further. Instead, you might want to return to the interactive fiction page. |
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| DavidW arrives, full of neither funk nor fun. | DavidW says, "Kindly give me a minute or two more here. My machine needs to delete stuff first." | |||
| Limax says, "Wow... and half an hour passes quickly" | ||||
| Limax arrives, full of neither funk nor fun. | ||||
| Marvin arrives, full of fun and funk. | DavidW says, "Today's game is Little Blue Men by Michael S. Gentry. It was 7th in IF Comp 1998 and won Best Individual NPC at the Xyzzies for that year, so this should be good." | |||
| Marvin says, "It better be..." | ||||
| DavidW says, "I know no more than what I just read at Baf's Guide, though, since I have never played this." | ||||
| Limax says, "Hee hee" | ||||
| Spinster says, "It is good" | ||||
| DavidW says, "Okay. Let's begin." | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "load bluemen" | ||||
Floyd | Are you sure you want to quit? Welcome to the Cheap Glk Floyd | Implementation, library version 0.9.0. Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | [pausing to show unread error message] | ||||
| Ellison arrives, full of fun, but no funk. | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "push green button" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | LITTLE BLUE MEN Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | [Press any key to begin] | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "push green button" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Another day in the trenches. Another day of tooth-and-nail against a Floyd | horde of sons of bitches who would chisel you out if you gave them Floyd | half a second or half a chance. And if they can't take you down with a Floyd | well-placed stab in the back, then they'll just wait you out and let Floyd | the big, creaking wheel of routine slowly drive you mad. Floyd | Floyd | Don't let them get to you. You've got to stay one step ahead. You've Floyd | got to keep it covered. Get a grip on it. Stay in the loop. Floyd | Floyd | And above all, you must remain. Totally. Frosty. Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "push green button" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | LITTLE BLUE MEN Floyd | An interactive object lesson by Michael S. Gentry, Floyd | Floyd | DISCLAIMER: This game contains strong language, graphic violence, Floyd | unwarranted hostility toward others and negative vibes of various Floyd | sorts. However, at its most fundamental level, this game is about Floyd | learning to love yourself. We hope that you can look past these Floyd | shocking and sometimes offensive trappings of style, and appreciate Floyd | the game's message for its inner substance. Floyd | Floyd | Type ABOUT before you do anything else. Floyd | Floyd | Release 1 / Serial number 980923 / Inform v6.15 Library 6/7 Floyd | Floyd | Your Corner Floyd | This is your scratching ground, your own little slice of the shit pie Floyd | these sons of bitches call an office -- and don't think for a second Floyd | that you didn't have to fight like hell to get it. Neatly shoved away Floyd | into the southwest corner of the general work area, where they think Floyd | you can't get into any mischief. Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are an in-tray (in which is some paperwork), an out-tray Floyd | (which is empty) and a telephone. Floyd | Floyd | You are carrying a crumpled dollar bill. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "Nice of the game to give you your inventory" | |||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "about" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Background Information Floyd | Floyd | Use the arrow keys to point to a question. Floyd | Press ENTER to select the question. Floyd | Press BACKSPACE to back out of the menu system. Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | > About this game. Floyd | About the author. | Limax says, "Wow. Long intro" | |||
| Marvin asks, "So, is this a game we can all just randomly do stuff to?" | ||||
| Limax asks, "Uh oh... arrow keys?" | ||||
| DavidW says, "hm. I dunno if we *can* press BACKSPACE on Floyd." | ||||
| DavidW pushes the green 'space' button. | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Background Information Floyd | Floyd | Use the arrow keys to point to a question. Floyd | Press ENTER to select the question. Floyd | Press BACKSPACE to back out of the menu system. Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | > About this game. Floyd | About the author. Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | This game is a joke. Floyd | Floyd | This game is a warning. Floyd | Floyd | This game is a satire. Floyd | Floyd | This game is inspired in equal parts by Vaclav Havel's The Memorandum Floyd | and Hunter S. Thompson's Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. Floyd | Floyd | This game is a big, stupid shaggy dog story. Floyd | Floyd | This game started out as a very silly game, and at some point during Floyd | the design process it turned into a very serious game instead -- too Floyd | far from the beginning to go back and rewrite everything to make the Floyd | mood more consistent, too far from the end to play it down to the Floyd | level of a minor punchline. The result is a kind of rushed and uneven Floyd | mixture of gonzo humor and surreal horror that didn't turn out to be Floyd | the polished, concise masterwork I had hoped it would be, but perhaps Floyd | it will make for an interesting playing experience, nonetheless. Floyd | Anyway, have fun. Floyd | Floyd | You might find the following commands useful: Floyd | Floyd | HINT Floyd | CREDITS Floyd | Floyd | [Please press SPACE.] | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "q" | ||||
| grim arrives, full of funk, but no fun. | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Background Information Floyd | Floyd | Use the arrow keys to point to a question. Floyd | Press ENTER to select the question. Floyd | Press BACKSPACE to back out of the menu system. Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | > About this game. Floyd | About the author. | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "q" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Your Corner Floyd | This is your scratching ground, your own little slice of the shit pie Floyd | these sons of bitches call an office -- and don't think for a second Floyd | that you didn't have to fight like hell to get it. Neatly shoved away Floyd | into the southwest corner of the general work area, where they think Floyd | you can't get into any mischief. Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are an in-tray (in which is some paperwork), an out-tray Floyd | (which is empty) and a telephone. Floyd | Floyd | You are carrying a crumpled dollar bill. Floyd | Floyd | > | Limax says, "At least it's not paperwokr" | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x paperwork" | ||||
Floyd | A thick sheaf of workpapers with relevant carbon copies attached. All Floyd | that fine print, all those tiny little scribbled blanks and Floyd | check-boxes -- your eyes water just looking at it. Fortunately, you Floyd | don't have to read it. All you have to do is stamp it. Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW says, "I did read that there are in-game hints, which we might need, eventually." | |||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "stamp paperwork" | ||||
Floyd | Any idiot knows you need a stamp to stamp! Floyd | Floyd | > | * grim has joined the channel. | |||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "x desk" | ||||
Floyd | This cheap chunk of fake wood and Formica is your desk. Key word: it Floyd | is YOURS. Any son of a bitch tries to move it, or go poking around in Floyd | the little drawer on the side, they are meat. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x phone" | ||||
Floyd | Oh yeah, the phone. You can't make outgoing calls on it; there's no Floyd | dial. You don't even know why it's on your desk. Presumably, you're Floyd | expected to answer it if it rings, but it never does. Never has. Not Floyd | once. Not ever. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "open drawer" | ||||
Floyd | You open the drawer, revealing an ink stamp, a little gray bottle and Floyd | a little white bottle. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "take stamp" | ||||
Floyd | Taken. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "x bottles" | ||||
Floyd | Which do you mean, the little gray bottle or the little white bottle? Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "both" | ||||
Floyd | Sorry, you can only have one item here. Which exactly? Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "gray" | ||||
Floyd | The bottles are where you keep your pills. Your pills are extremely Floyd | important; sometimes, they're the only way you can stay frosty around Floyd | here. One bottle contains your headache pills, the other your sleeping Floyd | pills. Unfortunately, you've spent so much time gripping and squeezing Floyd | and twisting the child-proof caps that the labels have long since Floyd | rubbed away, and now you can never remember which is which. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "gray" | ||||
Floyd | That's not a verb I recognise. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "get gray bottle" | ||||
Floyd | Taken. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "get white bottle" | ||||
Floyd | Taken. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x dollar" | ||||
Floyd | Lousy crumpled dollar bill... Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "stamp paperwork" | ||||
Floyd | (with the ink stamp) Floyd | You take a deep breath, raise the ink stamp high over your head, and Floyd | slam it down as hard as you can. Floyd | Floyd | - APPROVED - Floyd | Floyd | Right in the middle, every damn time. It's thrilling, on a sort of Floyd | visceral, primitive level. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit less steamed.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "score" | ||||
Floyd | You are currently feeling so-so. Floyd | Floyd | > | Marvin says, "Heh." | |||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "g" | ||||
Floyd | You are currently feeling so-so. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "stamp paperwork" | ||||
Floyd | (with the ink stamp) Floyd | You've stamped it once already. Give it a rest. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "put paperwork in tray" | ||||
Floyd | Which do you mean, the in-tray or the out-tray? Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "put paperwork in out-tray" | ||||
Floyd | (first taking the paperwork) Floyd | Seconds after you drop it in, Benson scoots by your desk and whisks it Floyd | away. Floyd | Floyd | The work is gone from your desk. It's out of your hands. A deep sense Floyd | of satisfaction and contentment fills your soul, and you smile. If you Floyd | had a chair, you would lean back in it happily, smug with the Floyd | knowledge that you've done a good job, and you are now utterly at Floyd | peace with yourself. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit more frosty.] Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW asks, "If we had a chair?" | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "look" | ||||
Floyd | This is your own tidy little corner, your home away from home in the Floyd | happy little community you like to call your office. All the security Floyd | and companionship you could ever want is right here and always will Floyd | be. Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are an in-tray (which is empty), an out-tray (which is Floyd | empty) and a telephone. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "score" | ||||
Floyd | You are currently loving life. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x chair" | ||||
Floyd | You can't see any such thing. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "No chair. You work standing." | |||
| Guest1 arrives, full of fun, but no funk. | DavidW says, "afk for a minute or so. Carry on." | |||
| Miseri has had his fill of playing for now, and goes back to the Lounge. | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "z" | ||||
Floyd | Time passes. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "e" | ||||
Floyd | Why leave? You've never been happier than when you're right here, Floyd | where you belong. Floyd | Floyd | Furman zooms past suddenly, and tosses more paperwork into your Floyd | in-tray. Your little bubble of happiness pops instantly and the gall Floyd | comes rushing back. Floyd | Floyd | The fucking nerve! As if you didn't have enough to do already! Those Floyd | sons of bitches never let up, they never give you a moment's peace. Floyd | Never a chance to catch up or take a breath or get even halfway Floyd | frosty. One of these days, you'll make them all pay... Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit more steamed.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x in-tray" | ||||
Floyd | That's where they put work for you to do. They never seem to get tired Floyd | of it. There's work in there right now, as a matter of fact. Lousy Floyd | sons of bitches! Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "take work" | ||||
Floyd | As you take the papers, a memo slips out between two pages and lands Floyd | on your desk face-down. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x memo" | ||||
Floyd | (first taking the memo) Floyd | First thing you notice, turning the memo over: it's not on official Floyd | firm stationery. You allow yourself a grim chuckle. Some poor slob's Floyd | going to get it in the ass for that little slip-up, and for once it Floyd | won't be you. Floyd | Floyd | Then you read it. Floyd | Floyd | All it says is: "How about a snack?" Floyd | Floyd | Some kind of joke? Nervously, you glance around, but neither Furman Floyd | nor Benson are anywhere in sight. Floyd | Floyd | Not that it matters. Obviously, some son of a bitch is trying to mess Floyd | with you. Either Furman or Benson, or maybe both. Or maybe that Floyd | bastard Biedermeyer. Whatever. One way or the other, that son of a Floyd | bitch is going to be sorry. That son of a bitch is going to find out Floyd | just how frosty you can be. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit more steamed.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Guest1 says, "clubfloyd" | ||||
| Jota arrives, full of fun, but no funk. | ||||
| Spinster says, "#clubfloyd text" | ||||
| Guest1 goes home. | Spinster says, "I believe now you can keep working on your paperwork, or leave the room" | |||
| Jota says, "Whoops, missed the start. Good thing I've played before." | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "e" | ||||
| Spinster goes home. | Jota says, "(Not sure how much I remember, but if I do remember anything out loud, I'll do it on #cfspoilers.)" | |||
| Marvin buggers off. | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Benson's Corner Floyd | As usual, Benson's corner of the office, is a filthy sty. Files, Floyd | papers, supplies lying around everywhere. You don't know how anyone Floyd | could work in these conditions. A vast bank of filing cabinets stands Floyd | against the west wall, behind Benson's desk. Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are some scattered papers. Floyd | Floyd | That lazy son of a bitch Benson is perched on his precious stool, Floyd | leaning back against the files with his feet up on the desk like Floyd | always. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin arrives, ready to play with the toys. | ||||
| Spinster arrives, full of fun, but no funk. | Spinster says, "ack" | |||
| Marvin asks, "Did I miss anything?" | ||||
| [cfspoilers] * vimes has joined the channel. | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "look" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Benson's Corner Floyd | As usual, Benson's corner of the office, is a filthy sty. Files, Floyd | papers, supplies lying around everywhere. You don't know how anyone Floyd | could work in these conditions. A vast bank of filing cabinets stands Floyd | against the west wall, behind Benson's desk. Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are some scattered papers. Floyd | Floyd | That lazy son of a bitch Benson is perched on his precious stool, Floyd | leaning back against the files with his feet up on the desk like Floyd | always. Floyd | Floyd | > | Marvin says, "I typed 'e' and then everything went kaplooey." | |||
| Marvin says, "Oh, we went east. Gosh." | ||||
| Spinster says, "I think the others didn't notice they went bloopy yet." | ||||
| Marvin asks, "Hello? Helloooooo?" | ||||
| DavidW says, "back" | ||||
| Spinster says, "Hm" | ||||
| DavidW asks, "Who's driving?" | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "i" | ||||
Floyd | You are carrying a memo, some paperwork, a little white bottle (which Floyd | is closed), a little gray bottle (which is closed), an ink stamp and a Floyd | crumpled dollar bill. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "Nobody really." | |||
| Marvin says, "Last thing that happened, I typed 'E', and we apparently went east." | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "stamp paperwork" | ||||
Floyd | (with the ink stamp) Floyd | You take a deep breath, raise the ink stamp high over your head, and Floyd | slam it down as hard as you can. Floyd | Floyd | - APPROVED - Floyd | Floyd | Right in the middle, every damn time. It's thrilling, on a sort of Floyd | visceral, primitive level. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "The memo is important" | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x memo" | ||||
Floyd | All it says is: "How about a snack?" Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "ask Benson about memo" | ||||
Floyd | Benson shrugs. "It didn't come from my desk." Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x benson" | ||||
Floyd | Benson is a lazy, ineffectual slob and everyone in the office knows Floyd | it. He's in charge of Records, which puts him slightly below you on Floyd | the totem pole, but it also entitles him to the use of the only stool Floyd | in the office -- and he hogs that thing for all it's worth. He never Floyd | actually uses it to get files. Just parks his pudgy ass on it and Floyd | munches nougat bars all day. Floyd | Floyd | Like your other co-worker Furman, Benson is short and slightly pudgy, Floyd | and wears thick, black-rimmed glasses. Floyd | Floyd | Benson shifts around on his stool, trying to get more comfortable. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "ask Benson about nougat" | ||||
Floyd | "Man, I LOVE those nougat bars!" cries Benson happily. "I could eat Floyd | those things all day long!" Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x stool" | ||||
Floyd | It's not a very fancy stool, but it's the only place to sit down in Floyd | the entire office. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "take glasses" | ||||
Floyd | "Hey," says Benson, jerking his head away. "Keep your hands to Floyd | yourself, will you?" Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "ask Benson about stool" | ||||
Floyd | "That's right," Benson says proudly, giving the side of the stool an Floyd | affectionate slap. "She's all mine." Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "ask benson about snack" | ||||
Floyd | Which do you mean, the snack machine, the nougat bar or the Beechnut Floyd | gum? Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "kick stool" | ||||
Floyd | You give the stool a good, hard thump. You thump it again, a bit Floyd | harder this time. Next thing you know, you're pounding on the stool Floyd | again and again for all you're worth -- you stop yourself, feeling a Floyd | bit light-headed. Damn. You hate it when that happens. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster asks, "hah. Bug?" | |||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "x desk" | ||||
Floyd | It's an ordinary-looking desk. A bit smaller then yours, but everybody Floyd | knows Benson's a lazy imbecile. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "kick benson" | ||||
Floyd | Oh, don't think you wouldn't love to pound Benson's face right through Floyd | the back of his pointy little head. You never would, though, not with Floyd | that bastard Biedermeyer watching your every move. Bide your time, Floyd | though. Stay frosty. His day will come. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "ask benson about snack machine" | ||||
Floyd | "Generous of management, isn't it, to provide us working stiffs with Floyd | that piece of junk, eh?" Benson smirks. "Still, he says, "I sure like Floyd | those nougat bars!" Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW says, "We probably need to buy a nougat bar from the snack machine." | |||
| aash29 arrives, ready to play with the toys. | Spinster says, "Something like that" | |||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "l" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Benson's Corner Floyd | As usual, Benson's corner of the office, is a filthy sty. Files, Floyd | papers, supplies lying around everywhere. You don't know how anyone Floyd | could work in these conditions. A vast bank of filing cabinets stands Floyd | against the west wall, behind Benson's desk. Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are some scattered papers. Floyd | Floyd | That lazy son of a bitch Benson is perched on his precious stool, Floyd | leaning back against the files with his feet up on the desk like Floyd | always. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "s" | ||||
Floyd | Since this is the southeast corner of the office, you can only go Floyd | north, west or northwest from here. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "n" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Snack Bar Floyd | What few pathetic nods to biological necessity are allowed by the firm Floyd | have been shoved away into the northeast corner. There's a coffee Floyd | maker in the corner, a vending machine against the east wall, and a Floyd | door to the restroom to the north. Floyd | Floyd | The vending machine stands there silently. Mocking you. Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW says, "But I'd first put the paperwork back in our out-tray" | |||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "sw" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Your Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are an in-tray (which is empty), an out-tray (which is Floyd | empty) and a telephone. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "save bluemen1" | ||||
Floyd | I only understood you as far as wanting to save. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "save" | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "bluemen 1" | ||||
Floyd | Enter saved game to store: Ok. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "oops" | |||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "put paperwork in out-tray" | ||||
Floyd | Seconds after you drop it in, Benson scoots by your desk and whisks it Floyd | away. Floyd | Floyd | The paperwork disappears, and once again that inner serenity builds in Floyd | you. Your anger subsides. Suddenly you realize that this is the Floyd | secret, and it has been all along: Floyd | Floyd | Work really will make you free. Floyd | Floyd | It really is that simple. You've been so foolish, so needlessly Floyd | frustrated all this time. Floyd | Floyd | Furman zooms past again, dropping more papers into your in-tray. But Floyd | it doesn't bother you. Smiling at the memory of your misguided ways, Floyd | and looking forward to the beginning of a new era of goodness, harmony Floyd | and team spirit you slowly raise the ink stamp and think: Floyd | Floyd | I could never find a better job than this, if I spent my whole life Floyd | looking. Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | *** You have learned to love yourself *** Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | In this game, you have finally managed to love life. Floyd | Floyd | Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, UNDO your last move, Floyd | give the FULL score for that game or QUIT? Floyd | > | Spinster says, "Well, go ahead" | |||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "undo" | Spinster says, "heheh" | |||
Floyd | Your Corner Floyd | [Previous turn undone.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "ne" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Snack Bar Floyd | Floyd | The vending machine stands there silently. Mocking you. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x machine" | ||||
Floyd | Ah, yes, the vending machine. Floyd | Floyd | Like most vending machines, it is essentially a refrigerator-sized box Floyd | with a glass front, behind which can be seen several rows of assorted Floyd | treats. There is a panel of buttons to the side, beneath which is a Floyd | slot for coins, a bill changer for paper money, and a cup for your Floyd | change. Insert your money, make your selection, and your snack drops Floyd | from the appropriate row into the receptacle bin at the bottom of the Floyd | machine. Floyd | Floyd | Simple. Floyd | Floyd | But there is more to this vending machine than only that. Floyd | Floyd | You hate this vending machine. You hate it more than just about Floyd | anything or anyone else in this office. This vending machine was Floyd | designed to hammer home a keen sense of the futility of existence; to Floyd | taunt you with life's possibilities only to forever harass and Floyd | frustrate your every attempt to grasp them. The machine never has Floyd | anything you want. And even if it did, you couldn't buy it because you Floyd | never have any change and the machine will only take mint-condition Floyd | bills crisp enough to scoop bean dip with. And even if, by some Floyd | fantastic stroke of luck, you did have change, and there was something Floyd | remotely edible in the machine that you actually wanted, you'd still Floyd | never be able to get it, because the merchandise invariably gets stuck Floyd | before dropping into the receptacle, and no amount of shaking will Floyd | bring it down unless you happen to be that son of a bitch Benson, who Floyd | somehow always manages to retrieve his disgusting nougat bars with a Floyd | single, insultingly skillful jiggle. Otherwise, forget it. Floyd | Floyd | The machine is your nemesis. Someday -- and you know that day is fast Floyd | approaching, you must destroy it... or it will destroy you. Floyd | Floyd | Benson strolls by and heads straight for the vending machine, ignoring Floyd | you completely. He pops a few coins into the slot and pushes 'A'. Floyd | Floyd | The machine dutifully grinds out another nougat bar, which snags on Floyd | the wire, like always, just before it can drop into the receptacle. Floyd | Floyd | Benson leans his hip against the machine and gives it a deft shove. Floyd | The nougat bar shakes free immediately and drops into the receptacle.. Floyd | Satisfied, he retrieves his prize, digs his change out of the change Floyd | cup, and heads back to his desk, already stuffing the end of the Floyd | nougat bar into his mouth as he goes. Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW says, "Baf's Guide did warn that the game can end early like that." | |||
| Marvin asks, "Did it warn that the game will suddenly fill the ENTIRE SCREEN WITH TEXT?" | ||||
| Spinster says, "I thought IF people liked wordy" | ||||
| Spinster says, "x snack" | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x snack" | ||||
Floyd | Which do you mean, the vending machine or the merchandise? Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "merchandise" | ||||
Floyd | There are ten rows behind the Plexiglass front, labeled A through J, Floyd | corresponding to the ten buttons on the side of the machine. Row A Floyd | contains those filthy nougat bars that Benson can't seem to stop Floyd | stuffing down his fat, greedy hole. Every other row contains Beechnut Floyd | gum. That's it. Nothing but Beechnut, Beechnut and Beechnut. Floyd | Floyd | You hate Beechnut. You don't know anyone who doesn't hate Beechnut. Floyd | Even Benson would probably start chewing on Furman's congealed coffee Floyd | grinds before shelling out for a stick of fucking Beechnut... Floyd | Floyd | Hey, wait a minute. Floyd | Floyd | Down at the bottom, in row J, something is glinting. It's a little Floyd | metal key. Second from the front. Right behind a stick of Beechnut. Floyd | Floyd | How the mighty freaking hell did that get in there? Floyd | Floyd | It's part of the joke. That must be it. Benson or Furman or that Floyd | bastard Biedermeyer are sneaking around here somewhere, spying on you Floyd | and laughing their asses off. Floyd | Floyd | You are abruptly seized by an acute desire to get that key, get it no Floyd | matter what the cost, and cram it down some poor joker's throat. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit more steamed.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "x key" | ||||
Floyd | It's a little metal key, dangling right behind the first pack of Floyd | Beechnut in row J. Damned if you know what it opens, though. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| aash29 says (to f), "l under machine" | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "score" | ||||
Floyd | You are currently feeling totally steamed. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| aash29 says (to floyd), "l under machine" | ||||
Floyd | Getting down on your hands and knees and peering under the machine, Floyd | you notice that one of the legs is slightly shorter than the other. A Floyd | thin wooden shim has been wedged under the shorter leg, preventing the Floyd | machine from wobbling. Floyd | Floyd | You also see a nickel which must have been dropped here earlier. You Floyd | snooze, you lose, punk-ass, you think to yourself gleefully, pocketing Floyd | the money. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit less steamed.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "put nickel in machine" | ||||
Floyd | The nickel disappears into the slot and rattles down into the guts of Floyd | the machine. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "press j" | ||||
Floyd | The machine beeps at you -- not enough money! Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit more steamed.] Floyd | Floyd | > | Limax says, "Yipes... time to g" | |||
| Limax has had his fill of playing for now, and goes back to the Lounge. | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "press change" | ||||
Floyd | You are unable to. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x machine" | ||||
Floyd | Like most vending machines, it is essentially a refrigerator-sized box Floyd | with a glass front, behind which can be seen several rows of assorted Floyd | treats. There is a panel of buttons to the side, beneath which is a Floyd | slot for coins, a bill changer for paper money, and a cup for your Floyd | change. Insert your money, make your selection, and your snack drops Floyd | from the appropriate row into the receptacle bin at the bottom of the Floyd | machine. Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW asks (of aash29), "How'd you know how to think of look under machine?" | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "press a" | ||||
Floyd | (the panel of buttons) Floyd | The machine beeps at you -- not enough money! Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| aash29 says (to clubfloyd), "habit of 'looking under'" | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "x bill changer" | ||||
Floyd | It says "Insert bill in any direction," but that is clearly a gross Floyd | misrepresentation of the facts. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "put bill in machine" | ||||
Floyd | (the crumpled dollar bill in the vending machine) Floyd | It isn't enough, sometimes, to simply know that your efforts are Floyd | hopeless; sometimes you really have to watch yourself fail one more Floyd | time -- just to drive the point home. Floyd | Floyd | Carefully, painstakingly, you smooth the crumpled bill as best you Floyd | can, then gently prod one end of it into the bill changer. The Floyd | mechanism inside catches it, drags it in and starts working it over. Floyd | When it finally spits the bill back out with a self-satisfied buzzing Floyd | sound, the dollar looks even more masticated than it did before. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit more steamed.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| aash29 says, "habit of 'looking under'" | Spinster says, "Type #cl text" | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "get shim" | ||||
Floyd | You pry the shim out from under the vending machine, which wobbles a Floyd | bit as the little wedge pops free. Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW asks, "I wonder if there's a press we can iron the bill with?" | |||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x shim" | ||||
Floyd | It's a thin wedge, made of wood. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "push machine" | ||||
Floyd | Violence has never worked on this machine before, but who knows? Floyd | Perhaps today's the day. You set your shoulder against the side of the Floyd | machine and give it a good shove. The vending machine rocks back Floyd | alarmingly, much more than you'd intended, and pauses on the very Floyd | brink of tipping... but doesn't. Floyd | Floyd | You breathe a sigh of relief. Floyd | Floyd | Then it rocks the other way, toward you. And it overbalances. And Floyd | falls. Your struggle to push the 1,500-pound machine back to an Floyd | upright position is vicious but very, very short. Floyd | Floyd | Stay frosty, you think desperately, stay frosty, stay frosty, just Floyd | stay fr-- Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | *** The machine has won *** Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | In this game, you have only managed to get yourself totally steamed. Floyd | Floyd | Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, UNDO your last move, Floyd | give the FULL score for that game or QUIT? Floyd | > | grim says, "bows" | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "/undo" | ||||
Floyd | Snack Bar Floyd | [Previous turn undone.] Floyd | Floyd | > | grim bows, even | |||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "pick up machine" | ||||
Floyd | That's hardly portable. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "Pick Up The Snack Machine And Die" | |||
| Jota says (to Floyd), "pull machine" | ||||
Floyd | You are unable to. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "z" | ||||
Floyd | Time passes. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "z" | ||||
Floyd | Time passes. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "jiggle machine" | ||||
Floyd | Violence has never worked on this machine before, but who knows? Floyd | Perhaps today's the day. You set your shoulder against the side of the Floyd | machine and give it a good shove. The vending machine rocks back Floyd | alarmingly, much more than you'd intended, and pauses on the very Floyd | brink of tipping... but doesn't. Floyd | Floyd | You breathe a sigh of relief. Floyd | Floyd | Then it rocks the other way, toward you. And it overbalances. And Floyd | falls. Your struggle to push the 1,500-pound machine back to an Floyd | upright position is vicious but very, very short. Floyd | Floyd | Stay frosty, you think desperately, stay frosty, stay frosty, just Floyd | stay fr-- Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | *** The machine has won *** Floyd | Floyd | Floyd | In this game, you have only managed to get yourself totally steamed. Floyd | Floyd | Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, UNDO your last move, Floyd | give the FULL score for that game or QUIT? Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "undo" | ||||
Floyd | Snack Bar Floyd | [Previous turn undone.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| plchoristers arrives, full of fun and funk. | Spinster says, "z" | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "z" | ||||
Floyd | Time passes. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "z" | ||||
Floyd | Time passes. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "z" | ||||
Floyd | Time passes. Floyd | | grim asks, "can we kill the other guy now then?" | |||
Floyd | > | Spinster says, "hrrrr" | |||
| Marvin says, "Are you trying to kill..." | ||||
| Spinster says, "yes :3" | ||||
| DavidW asks (of Spinster), "uh, what are you doing?" | ||||
| grim says, "not really, but he hits the machine to get his bar" | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "look" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Snack Bar Floyd | What few pathetic nods to biological necessity are allowed by the firm Floyd | have been shoved away into the northeast corner. There's a coffee Floyd | maker in the corner, a vending machine against the east wall, and a Floyd | door to the restroom to the north. Floyd | Floyd | The vending machine stands there silently. Mocking you. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x coffee maker" | ||||
Floyd | A simple device: push the black button on top, and it pisses a cupful Floyd | of tepid nastiness into the little dispenser beneath. Not that you'd Floyd | want it to. Furman's the only one who'll drink the revolting stuff. Floyd | Floyd | > | Marvin says (to DavidW), "Hoping the guy comes back to push the machine." | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "save" | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "bluemen2" | ||||
Floyd | Enter saved game to store: Ok. Floyd | Floyd | > | grim says, "might have to make him do that" | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "n" | ||||
Floyd | The restroom door wheezes shut behind you as you pass through. Floyd | Predictably, the smoke detector goes off as soon as you walk through Floyd | the door, cutting through your skull like a dull bone saw. Floyd | Floyd | Restroom Floyd | Every wall, fixture and counter surface in this restroom is painted an Floyd | intolerably bright, eye-bending nuclear orange. The reasoning behind Floyd | this choice of decor is unclear -- perhaps the hope is that someone Floyd | who is tense enough to crack walnuts with his ass cheeks isn't going Floyd | to be spending lots of time on a toilet seat. Anyway, there's a sink Floyd | and mirror in the north wall, and a stall to the east. Or you could Floyd | just leave to the south. Floyd | Floyd | The plastic smoke detector is stuck to the center of the ceiling like Floyd | a crazy orange limpet. Floyd | Floyd | The fire extinguisher is sitting in its usual corner, gathering dust. Floyd | Floyd | The smoke detector is still shrieking. Floyd | Floyd | > | Jota asks (of Spinster), "Have you played before?" | |||
| Spinster says, "A while ago" | ||||
| Jota says, "You'll want to be really careful not to accidentally give anything away, then." | ||||
| Spinster says, "Okey dokey." | ||||
| DavidW says, "I've seen no evidence that Benson's part of a daemon cycle." | ||||
| Spinster says, "Also, I went the wrong way" | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "x detector" | ||||
Floyd | That piece of crap hasn't detected so much as a bugfart since the day Floyd | they installed it. It only (and always) goes off whenever someone Floyd | actually enters the bathroom, letting forth with a piercing shriek Floyd | high enough to break up kidney stones. A further deterrent for anyone Floyd | too comatose to be bothered by the paint, probably. Floyd | Floyd | That whine is killing you. Your head feels like it's trying to give Floyd | birth to a crazed, pecking kiwi-bird. It's no good, you can't stay Floyd | frosty here; desperately, half-blind from the swirling orange Floyd | holocaust pressing in on you from all sides, you lurch to the door and Floyd | stumble out into the office. Floyd | Floyd | Snack Bar Floyd | Floyd | The vending machine stands there silently. Mocking you. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit more steamed.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "s" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Benson's Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are a half-eaten nougat bar and some scattered papers. Floyd | Floyd | That lazy son of a bitch Benson is perched on his precious stool, Floyd | leaning back against the files with his feet up on the desk like Floyd | always. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "take bar" | ||||
Floyd | "Hey!" snaps Benson. "Keep your hands off the nougat, buddy!" Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x papers" | ||||
Floyd | Which do you mean, the scattered papers or the paperwork? Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x scattered papers" | ||||
Floyd | Benson habitually keeps his papers in a state of hopeless mess, Floyd | scattered all over his desk. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "x cabinets" | ||||
Floyd | The filing cabinets cover the entire east wall. Their drawers are Floyd | perpetually closed. You've never even seen Benson go into them; then Floyd | again, you've never handed him a stamped request form, either. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "read scattered papers" | ||||
Floyd | (first taking the scattered papers) Floyd | You've got enough papers to push on your own desk without pushing any Floyd | of Benson's. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "w" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Your Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are an in-tray (which is empty), an out-tray (which is Floyd | empty) and a telephone. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "n" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Furman's Corner Floyd | The northwest corner is Furman's area. Everything is tucked away and Floyd | tidy, which is exactly how that obsessive freak likes it. The Floyd | photocopier squats over by the west wall, and a short corridor to the Floyd | north leads to that bastard Biedermeyer's office. Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are a microfiche reader and a file request form. Floyd | Floyd | Furman's jacket is hanging neatly up on its hook, just like always. Floyd | Floyd | Furman himself is hunched over his precious microfiche reader, Floyd | ignoring you completely. Floyd | Floyd | > | grim asks, "what's in the filing cabinets?" | |||
| DavidW says, "A distraction." | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "ask furman about memo" | ||||
Floyd | Furman frowns. "If you got a memo, it didn't come through me. And I Floyd | refuse to believe that Biedermeyer would have sent you a message Floyd | personally. Which means the memo is most likely unauthorized." He Floyd | turns away from you with a sniff. "If I were you, I'd take it straight Floyd | to Biedermeyer. I won't have anything to do with it." Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "x jacket" | ||||
Floyd | Neat, creased and free of lint. It's enough to make you sick. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "x form" | ||||
Floyd | Benson won't let anyone check out files unless they hand him a stamped Floyd | file request form. Of course, you're not authorized to keep forms on Floyd | your own desk -- you're forced to beg them off that son of a bitch Floyd | Furman. This one, however, might be free for the taking, if Furman Floyd | doesn't catch you. It looks like this one's already been filled out. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "get form" | ||||
Floyd | You deftly swipe the file request form from Furman's desk. He's so Floyd | absorbed with his reader, he doesn't even notice. Serves him right, if Floyd | he gets in trouble for losing it. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit less steamed.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "read form" | ||||
Floyd | Benson won't let anyone check out files unless they hand him a stamped Floyd | file request form. Of course, you're not authorized to keep forms on Floyd | your own desk -- you're forced to beg them off that son of a bitch Floyd | Furman. Or steal them, as the case may be. It looks like this one's Floyd | already been filled out. Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW says, "We can probably steal the bar or stool when Benson's filing the form. After we stamp it, of course." | |||
| grim says (to floyd), "stamp form" | ||||
Floyd | (with the ink stamp) Floyd | Carefully, you stamp the form right over the signature blank, pressing Floyd | down good and hard to make it dark. If Benson doesn't look to closely, Floyd | he'll never notice that Furman hasn't authorized it. Floyd | Floyd | > | grim asks, "is that too much me?" | |||
| DavidW says, "no. Go ahead." | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "se" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Benson's Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are a half-eaten nougat bar and some scattered papers. Floyd | Floyd | That lazy son of a bitch Benson is perched on his precious stool, Floyd | leaning back against the files with his feet up on the desk like Floyd | always. Floyd | Floyd | Someone taps you on the shoulder. You turn around, and are startled to Floyd | find that son of a bitch Furman away from his desk. Floyd | Floyd | "Excuse me," he says in his most irritated voice, "I was looking for Floyd | that." He plucks the file request form from your hand. "It's my last Floyd | one, and anyway you aren't authorized to use them." Floyd | Floyd | He sort of sniffs at you, then turns around and minces back to his Floyd | desk. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit more steamed.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "sw" | ||||
Floyd | Since this is the southeast corner of the office, you can only go Floyd | north, west or northwest from here. Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW says, "ack. We lost the darn form." | |||
| grim says, "mmm" | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x bar" | ||||
Floyd | It's disgusting; Benson's been gnawing on it for God knows how long, Floyd | and the end is all soft and melted and covered with Benson's slobber. Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW says, "We could try giving/showing the memo to Biedmeyer or whoever it is." | |||
| grim says (to floyd), "eat bar" | ||||
Floyd | (first taking the half-eaten nougat bar) Floyd | "Hey!" snaps Benson. "Keep your hands off the nougat, buddy!" Floyd | Floyd | Benson takes another bite of his nougat bar and sets it back on his Floyd | desk, ruminating thoughtfully. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "nw. n" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Furman's Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are a file request form and a microfiche reader. Floyd | Floyd | Furman's jacket is hanging neatly up on its hook, just like always. Floyd | Floyd | Furman himself is hunched over his precious microfiche reader, Floyd | ignoring you completely. Floyd | Floyd | Short Corridor Floyd | This short, empty corridor connects the main office area, to the Floyd | south, with Biedermeyer's office, to the north. Floyd | Floyd | The door to Biedermeyer's office is closed. Floyd | Floyd | A shiver runs up your back. You never come here. No one ever comes Floyd | here. You are finding it decidedly difficult to stay frosty. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "n" | ||||
Floyd | You can't, since the door to Biedermeyer's office is in the way. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "open door" | ||||
Floyd | It seems to be locked. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "knock" | ||||
Floyd | What do you want to knock? Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "knock on door" | ||||
Floyd | Timidly, you knock on the door. No one answers. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "knock on door" | ||||
Floyd | Timidly, you knock on the door. No one answers. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "kick door" | ||||
Floyd | You wouldn't dare. Your knuckles seem to curdle at the very thought. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "s" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Furman's Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are a file request form and a microfiche reader. Floyd | Floyd | Furman's jacket is hanging neatly up on its hook, just like always. Floyd | Floyd | Furman himself is hunched over his precious microfiche reader, Floyd | ignoring you completely. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "There you go" | |||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x form" | ||||
Floyd | Benson won't let anyone check out files unless they hand him a stamped Floyd | file request form. Of course, you're not authorized to keep forms on Floyd | your own desk -- you're forced to beg them off that son of a bitch Floyd | Furman. Or steal them, as the case may be. It looks like this one's Floyd | already been filled out. It's even been stamped. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "look in jacket" | ||||
Floyd | "Excuse me," Furman says, waving you off, "please don't touch my Floyd | clothes." Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "take form" | ||||
Floyd | Taken. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "x reader" | ||||
Floyd | Furman loves that reader; it's like his special toy. He never lets Floyd | anyone else touch it -- says it's "too complicated," though it can't Floyd | be that difficult if a terminal moron like Furman can operate it. Floyd | Anyway, the only controls are a toggle switch and a small button. Floyd | The microfiche reader is currently switched on. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "se" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Benson's Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are a half-eaten nougat bar and some scattered papers. Floyd | Floyd | That lazy son of a bitch Benson is perched on his precious stool, Floyd | leaning back against the files with his feet up on the desk like Floyd | always. Floyd | Floyd | Someone taps you on the shoulder. You turn around, and are startled to Floyd | find that son of a bitch Furman away from his desk. Floyd | Floyd | "Excuse me," he says in his most irritated voice, "I was looking for Floyd | that." He plucks the file request form from your hand. "It's my last Floyd | one, and anyway you aren't authorized to use them." Floyd | Floyd | He sort of sniffs at you, then turns around and minces back to his Floyd | desk. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x furman" | ||||
Floyd | You can't see any such thing. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "nw" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Furman's Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are a file request form and a microfiche reader. Floyd | Floyd | Furman's jacket is hanging neatly up on its hook, just like always. Floyd | Floyd | Furman himself is hunched over his precious microfiche reader, Floyd | ignoring you completely. Floyd | Floyd | Furman whirs through some more text on the microfiche reader. He makes Floyd | some clicking noises with his tongue, and scribbles down a few notes. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "Let's keep doing that and maybe it'll work" | |||
| DavidW says, "Obviously it won't work." | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "turn off reader" | ||||
Floyd | "Hands off," snaps Furman, slapping your hand away. "This is a Floyd | delicate piece of equipment." Floyd | Floyd | > | Marvin says, "Well, I thought maybe you had a limited time or something." | |||
| grim says (to floyd), "s" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Your Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are an in-tray (which is empty), an out-tray (which is Floyd | empty) and a telephone. Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW says, "No, I think it's cued to entering Benson's office with it." | |||
| grim says (to floyd), "ne" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Snack Bar Floyd | Floyd | The vending machine stands there silently. Mocking you. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| aash29 says (to floyd), "i" | ||||
Floyd | You are carrying a wooden shim, a memo, some paperwork, a little white Floyd | bottle (which is closed), a little gray bottle (which is closed), an Floyd | ink stamp and a crumpled dollar bill. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "l" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Snack Bar Floyd | What few pathetic nods to biological necessity are allowed by the firm Floyd | have been shoved away into the northeast corner. There's a coffee Floyd | maker in the corner, a vending machine against the east wall, and a Floyd | door to the restroom to the north. Floyd | Floyd | The vending machine stands there silently. Mocking you. Floyd | Floyd | > | Marvin says, "Yeah, probably." | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x coffee" | ||||
Floyd | A simple device: push the black button on top, and it pisses a cupful Floyd | of tepid nastiness into the little dispenser beneath. Not that you'd Floyd | want it to. Furman's the only one who'll drink the revolting stuff. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "press button" | ||||
Floyd | Which do you mean, the black button or the panel of buttons? Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW says, "I would guess we need to keep Furman occupied while delivering the form." | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "press black button" | ||||
Floyd | The coffee maker shudders as though straining to pass a gallstone, and Floyd | after a moment a plastic cup drops into its small dispenser. Then, Floyd | with a horrible, thick gurgling sound, it spews a generous amount of Floyd | terrible-smelling coffee into the cup. Voila; your swill is served. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| aash29 says (to floyd), "x gray bottle" | ||||
Floyd | The bottles are where you keep your pills. Your pills are extremely Floyd | important; sometimes, they're the only way you can stay frosty around Floyd | here. One bottle contains your headache pills, the other your sleeping Floyd | pills. Unfortunately, you've spent so much time gripping and squeezing Floyd | and twisting the child-proof caps that the labels have long since Floyd | rubbed away, and now you can never remember which is which. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "get coffee" | ||||
Floyd | (the nasty coffee) Floyd | Taken. Floyd | Floyd | > | Marvin says, "Oh, hey." | |||
| DavidW says, "oh right. Sleeping pill in Furman's coffee." | ||||
| Marvin says, "Pills, coffee." | ||||
| grim asks, "which pill's which?" | ||||
| DavidW says, "Now we just need.. yeah." | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "open white bottle" | ||||
Floyd | You open the little white bottle, revealing some gray pills. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "take gray pill" | ||||
Floyd | You toss one into your mouth and swallow it dry. It scrapes down your Floyd | throat like a chunk of gravel. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "undo" | ||||
Floyd | Snack Bar Floyd | [Previous turn undone.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "put gray pill in cofee" | ||||
Floyd | You can't see any such thing. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "put gray pill in coffee" | ||||
Floyd | You drop one of the gray pills into the coffee, where it instantly Floyd | dissolves into the murky depths. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "sw" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Your Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are an in-tray (which is empty), an out-tray (which is Floyd | empty) and a telephone. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "n" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Furman's Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are a file request form and a microfiche reader. Floyd | Floyd | Furman's jacket is hanging neatly up on its hook, just like always. Floyd | Floyd | Furman himself is hunched over his precious microfiche reader, Floyd | ignoring you completely. Floyd | Floyd | Furman whirs through some more text on the microfiche reader. "Oh, ho Floyd | ho," he chortles. He winks disgustingly at you and lays his finger Floyd | alongside his nose. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "give coffee to furman" | ||||
Floyd | "Hey, thanks," Furman says, hardly even glancing at you. He swills Floyd | down some coffee, wipes his chin with the back of his hand, puts the Floyd | cup on his desk and turns back to his microfiche. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "z" | ||||
Floyd | Time passes. Floyd | Floyd | Furman takes another sip of coffee, his eyes never leaving the Floyd | microfiche screen. Floyd | Floyd | > | grim asks, "why not put both pills in the coffee?" | |||
| DavidW asks, "Furman as 'Santa'?" | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x coffee" | ||||
Floyd | The coffee is thick and sludgy looking, with a thin, oily film Floyd | skimming the surface. Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW asks, "ho ho and finger alongside?" | |||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "open gray bottle" | ||||
Floyd | You open the little gray bottle, revealing some white pills. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "put white pill in coffee" | ||||
Floyd | You drop one of the white pills into the coffee, where it instantly Floyd | dissolves into the murky depths. Furman, absorbed with his microfiche Floyd | reader, doesn't even notice. Floyd | Floyd | Furman takes another sip of coffee, his eyes never leaving the Floyd | microfiche screen. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "Now he'll be sleepy and free of headaches" | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "z" | ||||
Floyd | Time passes. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "z" | ||||
Floyd | Time passes. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "z" | ||||
Floyd | Time passes. Floyd | Floyd | Furman whirs through some more text on the microfiche reader. "Hmm," Floyd | he mutters, "very interesting..." Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| aash29 says (to floyd), "open grey bottle" | ||||
Floyd | That's already open. Floyd | Floyd | Furman leans back from the microfiche, rubs his eyes and lets forth a Floyd | jaw-cracking yawn. "Man, am I beat," he says, and then pitches Floyd | headfirst across his desk like a pole-axed buffalo. Floyd | Floyd | Clearly, your pharmacopeial cocktail must have shagged him -- the Floyd | whites are obviously the sleeping pills. Potent ones, by the look of Floyd | it. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit more frosty.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "get form" | ||||
Floyd | Taken. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "look in jacket" | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "se" | ||||
Floyd | Nothing. Not even a molecule of pocket lint. Floyd | Floyd | > Floyd | Floyd | Benson's Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are a half-eaten nougat bar and some scattered papers. Floyd | Floyd | That lazy son of a bitch Benson is perched on his precious stool, Floyd | leaning back against the files with his feet up on the desk like Floyd | always. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "give form to benson" | ||||
Floyd | Benson takes the file request form, squints at it, turns it Floyd | upside-down, then looks you over suspiciously. He checks the form Floyd | again. He scratches his head. Floyd | Floyd | "Well," he says finally, "all right... but try to stamp it closer to Floyd | the edge next time, will you?" Floyd | Floyd | He turns his back to you and starts digging through the file cabinets. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit more frosty.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "give form to benson" | ||||
Floyd | You can't see any such thing. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "take bar" | ||||
Floyd | Taken. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "take stool" | ||||
Floyd | "Take a hike," snaps Benson. "I need this stool to reach the high Floyd | files. You want one, get your own." Floyd | Floyd | Benson turns back to you, shaking his head. "I can't find that file Floyd | anywhere -- hey!" He leans over and snatches the sticky nougat bar Floyd | from you. "Get your own, if you're that hungry!" Floyd | Floyd | Benson stretches his arms noisily. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit less frosty.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "undo" | ||||
Floyd | Benson's Corner Floyd | [Previous turn undone.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "eat bar" | ||||
Floyd | You take a deep breath and scarf down the nougat bar. Almost Floyd | immediately you begin to gag -- the stuff is essentially nothing but Floyd | sawdust and cushion stuffing coated with a thin layer of brown, edible Floyd | paste. But you force it down anyway, gobbling the whole thing in a Floyd | matter of seconds. Floyd | Floyd | Benson turns back to you, shaking his head. "I can't find that file Floyd | anywhere in our archives," he says. "Sorry." Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit less frosty.] Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW asks, "ugh. Why eat it?" | |||
| Marvin says, "So he can't take it back." | ||||
| DavidW says, "But, that's not why we wanted it." | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "n" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Snack Bar Floyd | Floyd | The vending machine stands there silently. Mocking you. Floyd | Floyd | > | Marvin asks, "Why did we want it?" | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "z" | ||||
Floyd | Time passes. Floyd | Floyd | Benson strolls by and heads straight for the vending machine, ignoring Floyd | you completely. He pops a few coins into the slot and pushes 'A'. Floyd | Floyd | The machine dutifully grinds out another nougat bar, which snags on Floyd | the wire, like always, just before it can drop into the receptacle. Floyd | Floyd | Benson leans his hip against the machine and gives it a deft shove. Floyd | The machine rocks back alarmingly, comes forward again, overbalances Floyd | and tips over. Benson never even sees it coming. Glass breaks, Floyd | Beechnut flies everywhere, and the machine, which weighs in excess of Floyd | 1,500 pounds, crushes the hapless son of a bitch before he can even Floyd | squawk for help. Floyd | Floyd | Satisfying; very satisfying. Looks like Benson and the machine both Floyd | got what was coming to them. By pitting your enemies against one Floyd | another, you've come out on top. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit more frosty.] Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "Because of that" | |||
| DavidW says, "well, I don't ... oh. That works." | ||||
| aash29 says, "#clubfloyd yay" | Marvin says, "Right, he wouldn't have come to the machine if he could just take the bar back." | |||
| Spinster says, "Turn off autosay" | DavidW asks, "Of course, we didn't key the key ... or can we now?" | |||
| grim says (to floyd), "get key" | ||||
Floyd | Taken. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit more frosty.] Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW says, "yay" | |||
| grim says, "glass broken" | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "get nickel" | ||||
Floyd | You can't see any such thing. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x machine" | ||||
Floyd | The machine is lying face down, its innards smashed and scattered Floyd | across the floor. A ragged hole has been hacked into the back of the Floyd | machine like some sort of crude, mechanical nephrectomy scar, Floyd | providing access to the inner workings. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x workings" | ||||
Floyd | It's a lot of mechanical stuff, mostly beyond you. Anyway, it never Floyd | worked right when it was intact, so why should it be of any use now? Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x benson" | ||||
Floyd | Benson is finished; the heavy vending machine squashed him like bug Floyd | under a brick. He lies face up and spread-eagled, half-under the Floyd | vending machine, his glasses slightly askew. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "I hope the nickel wasn't needed" | |||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "take glasses" | ||||
Floyd | Gingerly you tug at the glasses, but they don't seem to want to come Floyd | off. Looking closely, you see that this is because they seem to be Floyd | attached directly to Benson's flesh, right behind the ears. Floyd | Floyd | Pulling a little harder, you notice that the skin is in fact giving a Floyd | little bit, pulling away from Benson's head like the edge of a rubber Floyd | mask. And underneath the edge of skin, you can see... Floyd | Floyd | ... you can see something blue. Floyd | Floyd | At that precise moment, Biedermeyer walks up behind you. Floyd | Floyd | "Ah, thank you, but there's no need to mess with that," he says. Floyd | Instinctively you jerk your hand away from the glasses and drop your Floyd | gaze to the floor. Floyd | Floyd | "I know you want to help and all but, well... you know how it is. Floyd | Everything's fine here, everything's under control," says Biedermeyer Floyd | awkwardly. "Your concern is appreciated, but there's, uh, there's Floyd | really nothing more you can do." Effortlessly, he lifts the vending Floyd | machine with one hand and pulls Benson's corpse out from under it with Floyd | the other. "Go ahead and get on back to work now. Thank you." And he Floyd | hauls off Benson as casually as if he had just cleaned up a spilled Floyd | soda. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit less frosty.] Floyd | Floyd | > | Marvin says, "Man, I just killed some poor bastard." | |||
| Marvin says, "Oh..." | ||||
| DavidW asks, "Benson is *blue* under his skin?!?!?" | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "save" | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "bluemen3" | ||||
Floyd | Enter saved game to store: Ok. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "score" | ||||
Floyd | You are currently feeling totally frosty. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "I'm thinking of something blue... something blue. Something bluuue." | |||
| DavidW says, "I guess we can score the stool now. fwiw" | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "s" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Benson's Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are some scattered papers. Floyd | Floyd | You can see the stool here. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "take stool" | ||||
Floyd | Taken. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "read scattered" | ||||
Floyd | (first taking the scattered papers) Floyd | You've got enough papers to push on your own desk without pushing any Floyd | of Benson's. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x archives" | ||||
Floyd | You can't see any such thing. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "search scattered" | ||||
Floyd | You gingerly lift up a couple of sheets of paper, and discover a pair Floyd | of scissors underneath. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "w" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Your Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are an in-tray (which is empty), an out-tray (which is Floyd | empty) and a telephone. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "e" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Benson's Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are a pair of scissors and some scattered papers. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "take scissors" | ||||
Floyd | Taken. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "waait loot" | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x cabinets" | ||||
Floyd | The filing cabinets cover the entire east wall. Their drawers are Floyd | perpetually closed. You've never even seen Benson go into them; then Floyd | again, you've never handed him a stamped request form, either. Floyd | Floyd | Well, except for today, anyway. Floyd | Floyd | > | Marvin says, "Yeah, sorry." | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "search cabinets" | ||||
Floyd | Eagerly, you pull open a drawer and start riffling through the manila Floyd | folders inside, but all the folders in that drawer are empty. You slam Floyd | the drawer shut and open another one. Those folders are empty, too. Floyd | Drawer after drawer, each filled with manila folders, each manila Floyd | folder blank and empty. These worthless filing cabinets have nothing Floyd | in them, nothing in them at all. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit less frosty.] Floyd | Floyd | > | Marvin says, "I'm just wondering if we can get anything from the reader." | |||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "open drawer" | ||||
Floyd | It's just empty folders. All of it. There's absolutely nothing in Floyd | here. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "x desk" | ||||
Floyd | It's an ordinary-looking desk. A bit smaller then yours, but everybody Floyd | knows Benson's a lazy imbecile. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "look under desk" | ||||
Floyd | You find nothing of interest. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "OK, go ahead" | |||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "w" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Your Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are an in-tray (which is empty), an out-tray (which is Floyd | empty) and a telephone. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "x scissors" | ||||
Floyd | They're blunt scissors. They only let you use blunt scissors here. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "n" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Furman's Corner Floyd | Floyd | On the desk are Furman, a plastic cup (in which is some nasty coffee) Floyd | and a microfiche reader. Floyd | Floyd | Furman's jacket is hanging neatly up on its hook, just like always. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x reader" | ||||
Floyd | Furman loves that reader; it's like his special toy. He never lets Floyd | anyone else touch it -- says it's "too complicated," though it can't Floyd | be that difficult if a terminal moron like Furman can operate it. Floyd | Anyway, the only controls are a toggle switch and a small button. Floyd | The microfiche reader is currently switched on. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x furman" | ||||
Floyd | Furman is sprawled across his desk, totally gone. His glasses seem to Floyd | have gone crooked. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "take glasses" | ||||
Floyd | Time to get to the bottom of this, goddammit -- you give the glasses a Floyd | determined yank, stripping away a large swatch of Furman's face along Floyd | with it. Floyd | Floyd | The head underneath is small and perfectly round, like a shot-put Floyd | ball. The skin is a uniform, creamy, day-dreamy blue. And the eyes... Floyd | Floyd | Good jesus god almighty the eyes-- Floyd | Floyd | "Go back to your desk now," Biedermeyer says brusquely, stepping Floyd | between you and the body. He slips the glasses from your numb fingers. Floyd | "There's work to be done." Floyd | Floyd | You turn away, stomach heaving, as that bastard Biedermeyer bundles Floyd | away the body. When you finally look back, both Biedermeyer and Furman Floyd | are gone. As if nothing had ever happened. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit less frosty.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "x toggle" | ||||
Floyd | It's a simple toggle switch with a symbol at either end, like this: Floyd | Floyd | O Floyd | ! Floyd | X Floyd | Floyd | The switch is currently pointing toward 'O'. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x jacket" | ||||
Floyd | Neat, creased and free of lint. It's enough to make you sick. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "search it" | ||||
Floyd | Nothing. Not even a molecule of pocket lint. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "take it" | ||||
Floyd | You pull Furman's jacket down, leaving the empty hanger dangling on Floyd | the hook. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "get hanger" | ||||
Floyd | Taken. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "take hook" | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "push button" | ||||
Floyd | That's fixed in place. Floyd | Floyd | > Floyd | (the big green button) Floyd | The machine beeps at you; it won't copy anything unless there's Floyd | something on the glass. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "Mine mine all mine" | |||
| Marvin says, "Heh." | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x reader" | ||||
Floyd | Furman loves that reader; it's like his special toy. He never lets Floyd | anyone else touch it -- says it's "too complicated," though it can't Floyd | be that difficult if a terminal moron like Furman can operate it. Floyd | Anyway, the only controls are a toggle switch and a small button. Floyd | The microfiche reader is currently switched on. Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW says, "Photocopy the bill." | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "look in reader" | ||||
Floyd | Finally! A peek at Furman's precious little secrets... Floyd | Floyd | What the hell...?! Floyd | Floyd | The screen is filled with nothing but line after line of scrambled Floyd | mumbo-jumbo. There's nothing to this piece-of-crap microfiche reader Floyd | at all. That son of a bitch Furman's been playing you for a sucker Floyd | this whole time! Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit more steamed.] Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x small button" | ||||
Floyd | It's a simple button, labeled with a symbol like this: Floyd | Floyd | >> Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "push it" | ||||
Floyd | The text scrolls past in a bright blur. Floyd | Floyd | > | Marvin says, "Good plan." | |||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x machine" | ||||
Floyd | Which do you mean, the microfiche reader or the photocopier? Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "put bill in photocopier" | ||||
Floyd | The photocopier isn't open. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x photocopier" | ||||
Floyd | The photocopier is a hulking technological monstrosity that you've Floyd | never been able to satisfactorily figure out. It's got about fourteen Floyd | billion buttons on it and the only one you know how to use is the big Floyd | green one marked 'COPY'. There's also a lid on top (paper goes in), Floyd | and a small hopper off to one side (paper comes out). That's as Floyd | familiar as you've ever cared to (or are ever likely to) get with this Floyd | thing. Floyd | Floyd | Currently, the lid is closed and the hopper is empty. Floyd | Floyd | > | Ellison says, "I've got to mow my lawn. later all" | |||
| Ellison has had his fill of playing for now, and goes back to the Lounge. | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "open photocopier" | ||||
Floyd | You open the copier. There is nothing on the glass. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "put bill in photocopier" | ||||
Floyd | You put the crumpled dollar bill on the glass. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "press button" | ||||
Floyd | (the big green button) Floyd | The machine beeps at you; it won't copy anything unless you close the Floyd | lid first. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "close lid" | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "close lid" | ||||
Floyd | You close the photocopier. Floyd | Floyd | > Floyd | That's already closed. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "press button" | ||||
Floyd | (the big green button) Floyd | The copier vibrates ominously as its inner workings begin to churn. A Floyd | ghastly light seeps out from under the edges of the lid, there is a Floyd | terrible noise like a wet canvas being sucked through a mail slot... Floyd | Floyd | ... and a copy of the dollar bill drops out the other side and lands Floyd | in the hopper. Floyd | Floyd | > | Marvin says, "Although maybe we should have done this earlier." | |||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "open lid" | ||||
Floyd | You open the copier. On the glass is the original crumpled dollar Floyd | bill. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "take bill" | ||||
Floyd | (the original crumpled dollar bill) Floyd | Taken. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x copy" | ||||
Floyd | (the big green button) Floyd | Big, green and friendly. You can't go wrong with 'COPY'. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "take copy" | ||||
Floyd | (the big green button) Floyd | That's fixed in place. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x copy of the dollar bill" | ||||
Floyd | It's a reasonable facsimile of a dollar bill, although it's not going Floyd | to fool anybody as long as it's just a picture of a dollar bill in the Floyd | middle of an eight and a half by eleven inch sheet of paper. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "cut copy of the dollar bill with scissors" | ||||
Floyd | Carefully, you cut the excess paper from around the image of the Floyd | dollar bill. The end product is a little ragged around the edges, but Floyd | otherwise not too shabby. Floyd | Floyd | [You have just become a little bit less steamed.] Floyd | Floyd | > | Marvin says, "Oh, right, scissors." | |||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "ne" | ||||
Floyd | If you feel like visiting that bastard Biedermeyer, you can go north; Floyd | otherwise you can wander around the rest of the office to the east, Floyd | south or southeast. Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW says, "yup" | |||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "e" | ||||
Floyd | Floyd | Snack Bar Floyd | Floyd | The vending machine is lying face down and smashed amidst a pile of Floyd | nougat bars and Beechnut gum. Floyd | Floyd | There's a ragged hole hacked into the east wall, where the vending Floyd | machine used to stand. Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW asks, "Do we still need change, though?" | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "put dollar bill in machine" | ||||
Floyd | Why bother? Floyd | Floyd | > | Marvin says, "Also, a whole in the east wall" | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "put copy of dollar bill in machine" | ||||
Floyd | You can't see any such thing. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "i" | ||||
Floyd | You are carrying the original crumpled dollar bill, a hanger, Furman's Floyd | jacket, a pair of scissors, the stool, a shiny key, a wooden shim, a Floyd | memo, some paperwork, a little white bottle (which is open), inside Floyd | which are some gray pills, a little gray bottle (which is open), Floyd | inside which are some white pills and an ink stamp. Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW says (to Martin), "oho" | |||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "look in hole" | ||||
Floyd | Which do you mean, the hole in the wall or the broken vending machine? Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "look in hole in the wall" | ||||
Floyd | You hunker down and peer into the hole. It appears to go all the way Floyd | through the wall, but you can't see anything but empty darkness on the Floyd | other side. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "e" | ||||
Floyd | You can go north to the restroom if you want, though you might want to Floyd | save yourself some agony and just drive something sharp into your Floyd | bladder, instead. Otherwise, there's west, southwest or south. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "enter hole" | ||||
Floyd | Which do you mean, the hole in the wall or the broken vending machine? Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "wall" | ||||
Floyd | That's not something you can enter. Floyd | Floyd | > | DavidW says, "Just go east" | |||
| Marvin says, "I did." | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "e" | ||||
Floyd | You can go north to the restroom if you want, though you might want to Floyd | save yourself some agony and just drive something sharp into your Floyd | bladder, instead. Otherwise, there's west, southwest or south. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "yep" | |||
| DavidW says, "hm" | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x hole in wall" | ||||
Floyd | It's about six inches across, just big enough to put your fist Floyd | through. It's in roughly the same place that the hole in the vending Floyd | machine would be, if the vending machine were still standing against Floyd | the wall. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "reach in hole in wall" | ||||
Floyd | That's not a verb I recognise. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "look in machine" | ||||
Floyd | Peering into the machine, you can see the bent and shattered inner Floyd | mechanisms, but not much else. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "x bill changer" | ||||
Floyd | I only understood you as far as wanting to examine the original Floyd | crumpled dollar bill. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "x changer" | ||||
Floyd | You can't see any such thing. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "pot" | ||||
Floyd | That's not a verb I recognise. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x pot" | ||||
Floyd | You can't see any such thing. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "x machine" | ||||
Floyd | The machine is lying face down, its innards smashed and scattered Floyd | across the floor. A ragged hole has been hacked into the back of the Floyd | machine like some sort of crude, mechanical nephrectomy scar, Floyd | providing access to the inner workings. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "x inner workings" | ||||
Floyd | It's a lot of mechanical stuff, mostly beyond you. Anyway, it never Floyd | worked right when it was intact, so why should it be of any use now? Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "We could try the restroom" | |||
| DavidW says, "Or use the key for B's room." | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "look in hole" | ||||
Floyd | Which do you mean, the hole in the wall or the broken vending machine? Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| grim says (to floyd), "look in hole in wall" | ||||
Floyd | You hunker down and peer into the hole. It appears to go all the way Floyd | through the wall, but you can't see anything but empty darkness on the Floyd | other side. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "unfold hanger" | ||||
Floyd | That's not a verb I recognise. Floyd | Floyd | > | Spinster says, "go ahead" | |||
| DavidW says (to Floyd), "straighten hanger" | ||||
Floyd | The hanger doesn't really need it so much. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Marvin says (to Floyd), "n" | ||||
Floyd | The restroom door wheezes shut behind you as you pass through. Floyd | Predictably, the smoke detector goes off as soon as you walk through Floyd | the door, cutting through your skull like a dull bone saw. Floyd | Floyd | Restroom Floyd | Floyd | The plastic smoke detector is stuck to the center of the ceiling like Floyd | a crazy orange limpet. Floyd | Floyd | The fire extinguisher is sitting in its usual corner, gathering dust. Floyd | Floyd | The smoke detector is still shrieking. Floyd | Floyd | > | ||||
| Spinster says (to floyd), "x hanger" | ||||
Floyd | It's a hanger. Big deal. Floy | ||||